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16 Thoughts I Have When I'm Annoyed at Walmart

Updated on September 5, 2015
Source

I don't shop at Walmart often. Every time I do, I remember why I never go there.

Take yesterday, for example. The store was packed, as usual, despite the severe thunderstorm taking place outside. I typically get severe "cart rage" when this happens and find it incredibly difficult to avoid intentionally ramming my cart into another shopper. If I didn't have small children, I'd probably do it.

I wanted a jug of bottled water. Unfortunately, a woman and her friend/girlfriend/kid/whatever were blocking the water. I said, "Excuse me", but they continued talking. At this point, I had to reach behind the woman to slowly pull my water out. I was just inches away from her rear end, and it was obvious that I was struggling to get the giant jug of water out with her in the way, but she didn't seem to care.

I mean, seriously, WHO DOES THAT?! Do people not have manners these days? You see that somebody wants something behind you, so move. MOVE. For the love of God, just move.

Here We Go...

As I shop, I find myself thinking things - all of which are laced with profanity and nowhere near as nice as what I'm typing here - like:

  • OMG, get off your cell phone and shop.
  • Nobody wants to hear you scream at your toddler. We get that he's being bad, but Walmart is not the place for a full-blown screaming fest.
  • Nobody wants to hear you scream at your partner. We get that he/she is an idiot, but save that drama for your house.
  • Stop making out in the middle of the aisle. Go do that in the corner so I can get what I need.
  • Walk on one side, not the middle of the aisle. I can't get around you, and you're moving way too slowly.
  • Are you unaware that I'm looking for a parking space? Could you maybe move out of my way so I can get through the parking lot without killing you?
  • Yes, I am in line with 3 tired children. If you try to cut in front of me, I will not hesitate to "accidentally" ram my cart into you as I regain my spot and pay for my items.
  • Get out of my bubble. Why do all of you need diapers at the exact same time as me? Go get some bread and come back in two minutes. I can't breathe.
  • Could you maybe have put on a bra before you left the house? Just maybe?
  • Don't touch my children. Get your grubby fingers away. Now.
  • Now is not the time to lecture me about Jesus. I'm already religious. Go away.
  • Now is not the time to lecture me about my children. Like I care if you think my son shouldn't be eating while I shop or my baby needs shoes. Shut up already.
  • Why is there a line all the way back to electronics?! Why is there only one cashier?!
  • Stop beating your kid in the middle of the aisle.
  • I have small children. Now is not the time to walk around bragging about your drug use or the hot chicks you hooked up with last night. Please, just shut up.
  • This is why I shop at Target.

Yeah, Yeah...First World Problems, I Know

I get that there are things in life that suck way more than shopping at Walmart, but that doesn't make my trips to the store any less stressful. Expect to see me at Target until I get my annoyance under control.

Notice there are no cashiers in the picture?  Typical day at Walmart.
Notice there are no cashiers in the picture? Typical day at Walmart. | Source

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How Do You Feel About Walmart?

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How do you feel about Walmart? What are your biggest pet peeves? Are you Team Walmart or Team Target?

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    • ThatMommyBlogger profile image

      Missy 22 months ago from The Midwest

      Story of my life. LOL I hate going to Walmart.

    • janshares profile image

      Janis Leslie Evans 2 years ago from Washington, DC

      OMGoodness, Sunnyglitter, you had me at hello! Your first two sentences resonated with me exponentially. What is it about Walmart anyway? I hope I don't sound too judgmental. But I go in there only when I have to, specifically for summer camp stuff for the kids gift bags or art projects. I beat myself up every time. Thanks for the validation, funny hub.

    • profile image

      Wearmanyhats 2 years ago

      You put words on the feelings of many people, but I think Walmart makes the problem worse by not having enough checkout counters manned, people on the floor to help find things, and shelves that are consistently stocked. I hate the size of the place, especially since my knees hurt. It takes forever to shop there and the time to just walk around is huge!

    • Ericajean profile image

      Ericajean 2 years ago

      This article is funny and sad because it is so true. I actually liked Walmart back in the day; the 90s in particular.

      But now....it is a mess. I go only if I must. And that has been a long while now.

    • Ruth Angel profile image

      Ruth Mata 2 years ago from New Mexico

      I share your frustration. The Wal-Mart here in my town, NEVER has cashiers. The isles are never stocked, some of the people roaming the place are just unbelievable. I remember once when I was pregnant with my daughter, this old woman stopped me while I was walking so she could touch my belly?

    • profile image

      angie 2 years ago

      Walmart makes up fr givin pay raise by cutting emplyee hours how shady so its like no raise at all

    • ArianaLove profile image

      ArianaLove 2 years ago

      Great article. I have those same thoughts! And it takes everything in me not to get snotty with the cashiers who always seem to be going at a negative speed.

    • thegecko profile image

      Warren Samu 2 years ago from San Diego, CA

      Just some of the reasons I shop at Target as well =)