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How to Say No to a Friend That Asks for Money

Updated on February 22, 2012
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The Joy of Saying No

Is a matter of having fun saying no. No is such a wonderful, liberating word. There is no word more responsible in the world than the word "no". If the United States Congressional Budget and other finance related agencies were to say no more often, we would not be immersed in this terrible hoolabaloo we are now. If the Department of Defense had the power to say no, there would've been no need to bring our troops home, because they would've never left. When it comes to friends and relatives asking for money, look at it as the chance to educate them.

This is how you say no with a smile, with no drama and no need for alibis.

10 and More Ways to Say No to a Friend

1. Tell him you are doing him a favor by denying him the money. You are doing it to save the friendship.

2. Ask him when is he expecting to get money. Then have him consider to wait until then, that way he doesn't need to owe you any money.

3. Share your sad story with him. Bring on your statements and your debts. If he talks about a broken arm, tell him about your broken leg. If he gives you this sad story about his cell phone, remind him of the many times you were at risk of having yours disconnected. Don't be ashamed of sharing all your sad financial stories with him. After all, that's what friends are for right? At least all you're asking for is a pair of ears and maybe a shoulder, not their next paycheck.

4. Do not be afraid of being the bad one. You are going to end up being the bad one anyway. You might as well play the part and save your money, rather than trying to do something you can't really afford and then end up chasing bones while losing a friendship.

5. Rethink the definition of a friendship. Are you really a friend or a personal ATM? When friendship is about all you can give to the other, and there is no balance in giving and receiving, regardless of the giving and receiving being solely of material nature, one should rethink if this is the kind of friendship one should be striving for.

6. Practice at saying no. The word "no" has so many negative connotations, and there is so much emotion tied up to it. Be assertive. There is day and night, life and death, they all coexist. There are moments to say yes and moments to say no. Saying No Is Good.

7. Be your own best friend first. A true friend would not place any other friend in the predicament of being in the hole. If I may relate a short personal experience, I have never asked anyone for money, not even my parents. And is not about being self-sufficient, is about personal responsibility. Last time, the only time, I loaned my boyfriend any money, I had him sign a contract and wrote in the times he paid me back.

8. Business is Business. Separate the issues in your life. Love pertains to love. Money pertains to money. If they go to the bank and the bank doesn't loan them money because they have bad credit, and you are willing to take a risk where the finance experts will not meddle, then is fool you twice.

9. Again, saying no doesn't make you a bad person. There are red lights and green lights. Would you say a red light is bad when is saving you from crashing into an upcoming vehicle?

10. If they make a scene because you said no that is enough proof of some friendship. Don't worry about being alone... is not that bad. You are really making space in your life for true quality people, just in case they decide to walk out the door on you, they've done you a favor. One less person to say no to.

Hope This Helps

Personal character is your true friend. And anybody that wants to have the honor of your friendship will absolutely respect and admire you more for having control of your life and actions.

Say No. No is Good.

Comments

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    • CrazyGata profile imageAUTHOR

      CrazyGata 

      4 years ago from Puerto Rico

      Why thank you for such a thorough comment! And thanks for the cheer. I hope you don't mind if I keep your letter as a personal reference... I could use your comment as a letter of recommendation!

    • CrazyGata profile imageAUTHOR

      CrazyGata 

      4 years ago from Puerto Rico

      Why thank you for such a thorough comment! And thanks for the cheer. I hope you don't mind if I keep your letter as a personal reference... I could use your comment as a letter of recommendation!

    • kenneth avery profile image

      Kenneth Avery 

      4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama

      CrazyGata,

      I have always hated to be the one who is hated, but even worse, to be the one who is used by a so-called friend.

      I will tell you the truth. I really love this hub. And here are the reasons why:

      1. This is an excellent piece of writing. Amazing work.

      2, I loved the way you worded this hub.

      3. Graphics, superb.

      4. This hub was helpful, informative and very interesting.

      5. Voted Up and all of the choices.

      6. I loved your topic.

      You are certainly a gifted writer. Please keep up the fine work.

      Sincerely,

      Kenneth Avery, Hamilton, Alabama

    • mizjo profile image

      mizjo 

      6 years ago from New York City, NY

      I never could say No, and so had to learn the hard way that it had to be done. I won't go into the painful details; suffice it to say I was burnt pretty badly. The borrower is now an ex-friend.

      I have learned since that many other former friends of hers had also lent her money. Since they are 'former' friends, you can draw your own conclusions.

      Crazy Gata, this is a hub for everybody.

    • CrazyGata profile imageAUTHOR

      CrazyGata 

      6 years ago from Puerto Rico

      Is an expensive lesson to learn from saying yes one too many times. Thank you for reading and posting.

    • Jaspal profile image

      Jaspal 

      6 years ago from New Delhi, India

      Good hub! I've learnt the hard way - on more occasion than one - not to loan money to a friend!

    • CrazyGata profile imageAUTHOR

      CrazyGata 

      6 years ago from Puerto Rico

      hahahaha!!!! Fine... You win, we'll split. hahaha!!!

    • Frank Atanacio profile image

      Frank Atanacio 

      6 years ago from Shelton

      LOL funny girl with jokes.. ill take you to lunch but whose buying?

    • CrazyGata profile imageAUTHOR

      CrazyGata 

      6 years ago from Puerto Rico

      You telling me! I left out the fact that my boyfriend never paid me back! I have the record in my file, every once in a while I take it out, look at his last payment...

      And sigh... Try and top that! :D Hey... Care to invite me to lunch? hahahaha!!!!

    • Frank Atanacio profile image

      Frank Atanacio 

      6 years ago from Shelton

      this was actually pretty good.. my friend asked me to loan him 100 bucks all I had was fifty.. and now he keeps tracking me down for the other fifty.. Im avoiding him when he should be trying to pay me back now aint that some shit :) LOL

    • CrazyGata profile imageAUTHOR

      CrazyGata 

      6 years ago from Puerto Rico

      The last time my brother asked me for money, I gave him this story...

      Then I heard his... He had money coming in in two weeks.

      I'm like, so why don't you wait? That's what I do...

      He asked me no more. Thank you for your comment and reading.

    • mio cid profile image

      mio cid 

      6 years ago from Uruguay

      I would add also some family members who sometimes see you as an easy way out instead of taking the trouble to look for a better solution.

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