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10 Lethal Things You Never Do to a Marine Drill Instructor

Updated on April 28, 2014

"Welcome to the Marines, maggot!"


Here we are in

the United States Marine Corps. Oooo- Rahh!

I owe the Marines so much. My freedoms that I foolishly take for granted. God forgive me. Our country would be in deep-trouble if it weren't for the Marines.

Oh behalf of my family and I, "Thank you, to all of the brave, sacrificial and valiant members of the Marine Corps who have given their all just so we can sleep at night."

And with all due-respect, that is why I lovingly-dedicate this piece to all Marine drill instructors, or "D.I.'s" as they are called by the Marine "boots," who think that anyone can lick the eight weeks of mental, physical and emotional grind and pure, unadulterated torture to become a member of the highly-respected Marine Corps.

In the Marines, there are people whom you do not mess with for any reason. Even if your life hangs in the balance. These people are the Marine drill instructors. If you have a half a brain and an ounce of common sense, you best do as these guys and gals say,

Please keep in mind that there are . . .

"10 Lethal Things That You Do Not Do to a Marine Drill Instructor"

To say that the Marine Corps are tough is like saying the Mona Lisa is a pretty painting.

Ask any current-member or retired Marine and they will quickly tell you that the Marines are "the" toughest, meanest, bravest, and can take on anybody and win. And these guys and gals really mean what they say because they believe it. And they believe in themselves.

I know for a fact that if I had volunteered when I was 18, in 1972, during the Draft and the Vietnam War I would have washed-out and been sent-packing.

I am not a tough person. Mentally or physically. I admit it with no shame.

But nonetheless, I still respect and admire the United States Marine Corps.

Marine wannabe's

just keep in mind as you scan this article which was written in admiration for the Marines, you enter as a common guy and leave a Marine.

You will notice in this article that I did not mention the CBS sitcom, "Gomer Pyle, U.S.M.C.," and I have a reason: Although Jim Nabors did a super-job of playing country bumpkin and all-around good guy, "Gomer Pyle," on the "Andy Griffith Show," I personally think that his show, did not put such a hallowed group of people as the Marine Corps in a respectful light.

As the Holy Bible states, "to every time there is a season. A time to laugh and a time to cry." And "Gomer Pyle, U.S.M.C.," to me, was a time to cry. Not laugh.

"I said drop and give me 50!"


Actual Marine Corp images

A Marine must learn self-discipline.
A Marine must learn self-discipline. | Source
R. Lee Ermy, actual Marine Corp retiree and actor.
R. Lee Ermy, actual Marine Corp retiree and actor.
Marines must learn teamwork.
Marines must learn teamwork. | Source
Marines are made from all shapes, sizes, colors and backgrounds.
Marines are made from all shapes, sizes, colors and backgrounds. | Source

And now, the 10 Lethal Things You Never do to a Marine Drill Instructor

#10: You do not hide the drill instructor's Smoky the Bear hat.

#9. You do not replace the drill instructor's sidearm .45 automatic with a water pistol.

#8. You do not let the drill instructor catch you sleeping with an inflatable doll.

#7. You do not interrupt the drill instructor while he wakes you up at the ungodly hour of 4 a.m., demands that you make your bunk in five seconds and proceeds to call you an idiot, a fool, and a piece of trash, but tot he drill instructor, those are the good names.

#6. You do not run naked through the rifle range and yell, "Shoot me all you want! I am Superman!"

#5. You do not sneak into the drill instructor's office and catch a nap in his bed.

#4.You do not have a friend sneak a horse to you inside the barracks.

#3. You do not ask the drill instructor in front of all the platoon, "Uhhh, sarge. Do you not love me?"

#2 You do not bring your guitar into the barracks and sing "American Pie," all night long.

#1. You do not ask the drill instructor if you can take his wife out on Friday night.

But seriously

thank you, dear followers and non-followers for taking the time to read this hub. I do this for I do not take your support, following, and comments for granted.



If you had it to do over, would you have enlisted in the Marines?

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    • kenneth avery profile imageAUTHOR

      Kenneth Avery 

      4 years ago from Hamilton, Alabama

      Dear Sheila,

      Thanks a million for your comment. I loved it. You were a Hospital Corpsman? Wow, that was a great job. And I admire you for not taking the poll. Marines and Navy SEALS are two groups I respect enough to not bother them.

      Yes, they do know how to have fun and yes, they TCB when they have to.

      Thanks again for your nice comment.

    • profile image


      4 years ago

      ROFL!!! Love this one! I didn't answer your poll because my answer would be "No way! I don't have that much guts!" I do have to say though, if I would've stayed in the Navy I would've chosen to be stationed with those guys. Some people will see that and say "What? Are you crazy? The Marines hate the Navy!" I was a Hospital Corpsman, so to those guys I was "Doc". I loved when I got a chance to go out to do medical coverage when they were at the shooting range. Even more, I liked when we got to hang out at the local pub. They're serious at work and know how to have fun off duty. I love Marines! OOH-RAH!

    • bethperry profile image

      Beth Perry 

      4 years ago from Tennesee

      ROFLOL!! Oh, this is priceless. Thanks for posting and voted up!

      P.S. - will have to show this one to my husband, who was in the army and has told me some likewise do's and don't's about military staff.


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