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The Culture of Bullying, Backstabbing and Mean People – The New American Way?

Updated on October 29, 2014

A Culture of Mean

When did we become a Culture of Meanness? Even here at hubpages, where it is supposed to be a community of writers encouraging other writers I have found hubs while hub hopping that were nothing more than rants on how homely Kate Middleton is, in the writer’s opinion, as well as downright mean and hurtful comments on other people’s hub articles and in the forum.

Of course it is always easier for people to be mean on the internet when one can hide behind anonymity and make any snarky comment that comes to mind. I think if the person writing mean comments on other people’s blogs and sites were to stop and think “would I say this in person to someone I know?” Perhaps they would rethink their comment. I have seen and heard people say things that are a cruel and distasteful about people that are famous, as if being famous means people can say whatever they want about you, especially if you have hit rock bottom, (Britney, Charlie, Michael, and Anna Nicole). People seem to forget that these celebrities are still someone’s daughter, father, sister, mother, or brother. Would you want someone to talk about your family member that way?

Bullies Every Where

It seems like more and more entertainment is centered on people being mean to each other. Popular shows like the Real Housewives of Orange County, Atlanta and New York, have turned back stabbing, name calling and all out physical brawls into “acceptable entertainment.”

I can remember being harassed and picked on in school when I was a kid, but at least once I got home I could escape it. Now, poor kids, have no relief. Text messages, Facebook, You Tube and Twitter ensure that the horror and humiliation can continue unrelentingly, 24-hours a day. In the cases of Tyler Clementi and Phoebe Prince, the bullying drove them to suicide.

Pompous Pundits

All day long we are bombarded with negativity. From every echelon of society the ugliness is all around us. People can’t even have a lively debate about issues or ideas without it turning into hateful personal attacks. This is especially evident on news shows and in politics. Recently both Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck, made mocking comments about Japanese earthquake victims because despite the tragedy, they still continue to do ordinary things like recycle. First we have Limbaugh’s equally insensitive caller who said, “If these are the people that invented the Prius, have mastered public transportation, recycling, why did Mother Earth, Gaia if you will, hit them with this disaster?” Limbaugh replies with “He’s right. They’ve given us the Prius. Even now, refugees are recycling their garbage.” Laughing about it he continues with, “and yet, Gaia levels them! Just wipes them out!”

Not to be out done, Glenn Beck came out with this little gem, “I’m not saying God is, you know, causing earthquakes,” quickly adding that he’s “not not saying it either. Whether you call it Gaia, or whether you call it Jesus, there’s a message being sent. And that is, ‘Hey, you know that stuff we’re doing? Not really working out real well. Maybe we should stop doing some of it.’ I’m just saying.”

At the risk of falling into the same pattern of meanness, are Limbaugh and Beck complete idiots? Do they actually believe the words that come out of their mouths?” Seriously!

A Plague of Ugliness

All of this constant meanness seems to spread like a pandemic and before you know it you catch yourself saying some mean, offhand comment about an acquaintance, a co-worker, a complete stranger, or even a friend.  Just today, I caught myself commenting on how annoying I found a “yuppie” couple and their “bratty” kids.  Maybe the children were tired. Maybe the husband really loved pink and those shorts made him happy when he wore them.  Who was I to judge?  I have certainly made some questionable fashion choices and my children haven’t always been perfect angels.

The other day, a friend of mine posted on Facebook how someone she knew said something hateful about the situation in Japan.  She said she wasn’t going to give into this culture of hate; that the cure for hate was love. She was going to fight hate with love.  Let’s all try that.  Let’s fight hate with love and see if we can’t change the world. If not the whole world than maybe we can change just our little portion of it.

Peace, Love and Understanding


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  • Tess45 profile image

    Tess45 5 years ago from South Carolina


    And it has gotten worse since I wrote this.

  • profile image

    Justsilvie 5 years ago

    Excellent Hub! After being out of the country for the last 15 years the meanness here is a like culture shock. Yes I know it exist all over the planet, But we seem to have brought it to a new level, and giving this behavior star status! It is really scary!

  • Tess45 profile image

    Tess45 6 years ago from South Carolina

    Thanks, Dawn and it's good to hear that there are young people who are standing up for what is right.

  • profile image

    Dawn  6 years ago

    We are having a stop the Violence Week at school. Some of the students made art. ONe child wrote an essay how she used to be a bully and learned to change. It was so good to see our students taking a stand.

  • Tess45 profile image

    Tess45 6 years ago from South Carolina

    The level of cruelty that exists in Man never ceases to amaze me and sicken me. So Sorry DiY

  • DIYweddingplanner profile image

    DIYweddingplanner 6 years ago from South Carolina, USA

    So true, I just had someone write a downright cruel comment on one of my hubs about my dog passing away! Good grief, what will people stoop to and hide behind the internet?!

  • graceomalley profile image

    graceomalley 6 years ago

    This is why i only turn on the TV to watch a DVD - I'm happier missing things like people actually blaming earthquake victims for their suffering. Next they can blame abused children & abused women for "asking for it."

  • BabWryter profile image

    BabWryter 6 years ago

    Hey, thanks! I completely agree!! You rock.

  • Tess45 profile image

    Tess45 6 years ago from South Carolina

    aww, Thanks Barbergirl! When I decided to write on hubpages I made a promise to myself to only write in positive ways and avoid the negative, especially when it comes to women of all ages, fashion, beauty and self-esteem.

  • barbergirl28 profile image

    Stacy Harris 6 years ago from Hemet, Ca

    Very well said. This world has become a very mean place where people are completely centered around themselves and their own needs. A completely innocent statement can be twisted and turned so both parties look like complete jerks. I wish everyone would take this advice and cure all the hate with good ole fashioned love. Maybe then this place would be a little happier than it currently is.

    Can't say it enough... well said. Definitely a vote up. Because after reading those words, I am pretty certain that you rock! :)