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Dude, Where’s My Job?

Updated on June 16, 2010

Pack your bags!

We’re always losing things. Our phone, our car keys, our belief in anything remotely resembling justice. And apparently over the past decade, a few million of us have lost our jobs.

A few million of us.

Well, never fear, for I have a good idea where your job is. And, I’ll give you a hint: It’s in a land far, far away. Or, maybe it’s closer than you think.

It’s difficult to pinpoint exactly how many American jobs have been lost to other countries over the years, mostly because companies are not required to publish those numbers.

But - if you’re determined to find that job you lost, I have a guide to help you get started. Bear in mind, the percentages below will vary, depending on the type of job you’ve lost. But, it’s a starting point.

First, pack your bags with a good mix of warm and cold weather apparel, because we’re off to -

China (12 - 15 %)

Comprising nearly 3.7 million square miles and boasting a whopping 1.3 billion people, China has one of the world’s fastest growing economies. If your lost job was in manufacturing, you can add about 4% to the odds you’ll find it here.

But, if you didn’t find your job in China, the good new is that you won’t have far to go, because there’s a good chance it’s in-

India (10 - 13%)

The land of curry, and brilliantly adorned buses, India has attracted thousands of jobs previously held by Americans, specifically in the IT and customer service fields. Not here? Well, get ready for a long plane ride, because our next destination is-

Canada, Mexico, Central and South America (10-13%)

Thanks to NAFTA and CAFTA, hundreds of thousands of American jobs were lost to these locations. Howdy, neighbor! Seen my job?

Still haven’t found it? Well, you’re racking up the frequent flyer miles, because next we’re off to-

Vietnam, Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, the Philippines (7 - 10%)

Especially if you were in the garment industry. Great photo ops here, by the way.

Do you mean to tell me you still haven’t found your job? Okay, now it’s time to look in-

Eastern Europe, Russia (5 - 8%)

Yes, American jobs have been lost in Russia. Don’t ask me how.

If at this point you still haven’t been able to put your hands on that lost job, you can still look in England, France, Germany, Italy, Turkey, South Africa, Singapore, Malaysia, Indonesia, Taiwan, South Korea and Japan, because studies have indicated that at least a few American jobs have been spotted in those places.

If all else fails, you could spin a globe and throw a dart at it. There’s a good chance that if you didn’t lose your job in the country the dart hits, someone you know did.

Every year - year in and year out - we elect people to “represent” and “govern” us. Most if not all of these people claim they are committed to keeping American jobs here at home. And every year - for at least the past 30 - we’ve lost jobs to other countries.

Maybe it’s time we took a good hard look at how we elect those who represent us, because there’s something seriously wrong with this picture - and, as Jerry Garcia sang - it’s probably “even worse than it appears”.


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