Gay People, The Supreme Court, and Equal Civil Rights
Disclaimer
In the following paragraphs, I describe the physical aspects of gay people. I don't intend it to be in any sense of the word derogatory. It is meant to point out the difference between gay and straight people and to make a point that they are born with a predisposition to these difference. It is not a choice on their part.
Meet Kate
In all of my years on this planet, I have met many gay people. I have a niece Kate, who as a little girl cried whenever her mother made her dress up in girly clothes. She was always more comfortable in cowboy clothes and guns with a holster than dolls and frilly things. As a young lady she married a very nice man and their marriage was annulled shortly thereafter. A very short time later, she came out as a lesbian and introduce us to her partner. She is currently a lineman for Southern California Edison and is very happy. I have to say she has many masculine features and behaviors.
Meet Trish
When I worked at Sony, I worked with a lady named Trish. We had many conversations with her about her and her lesbian partner. She told me that as soon as she could talk, she told her mother to take her to the hospital and make her a man. She also has many masculine features and behaviors.
Neighbors
I had two neighbors who were also gay, one was a gym teacher and the other was a chiropractor. One was built like a truck driver walked like one and the other was more feminine. They got along very well and were very helpful and friendly with others in the neighborhood.
Meet my Son
I have a 45 year old son who came out two years ago. He always seemed uncomfortable around females who were attracted to him. He is drop dead handsome and flies 747s all over the world. I think that might have something to do with the attraction aspect. He lived in Alaska as a bush pilot for many years and we knew that he was living with women, but there never seemed to be a real connection to the opposite sex. It was more a matter of convenience for sharing a place to live. When he came out, he told us that he was tired of hiding and living a life that was not really his and he wanted to share his life with someone.
After he came out, he introduced us to his partner. They are now living in Chicago and are very happy. We are happy as well, because he is happy. Again, his partner is slight of build and has feminine behaviors.
You Can't Pray Away the Gay and Therapy Won't Work
So why am I telling you all of this? The point I'm trying to make is, I don't believe gay people have a choice as to being gay or straight. They are born with a certain predisposition that not only affects them mentally, but in some cases physically. I don't know if it is in their DNA, but they are wired differently than straight people are. You can't pray away the gay or send them to therapy to change them. It just simply isn't going to work.
Nature never does anything in a straight line. If it did, we would all look alike and every species in nature would also look alike. The only constant in the universe is change. Even our culture is changing today. In the 1950s, I was in the Air Force and spent part of my career in Biloxi Mississippi and Valdosta Georgia. It was a time of deep segregation and prejudice. I remember the signs that separated blacks from whites for toilets, drinking fountains, and public transportation. Today, for the most part, we have evolved into a society that accepts other races and cultures. I believe there are still some areas of residual prejudice though.
Hollywood and the Media
I believe that Hollywood and the media have played a big part in the acceptance of not only racial differences, but also sexual difference. Movies are made today that show different races sexual persuasions in intimate relationships. T.V. shows like Modern Family, Glee, and others show gay people in various situations that have helped to bring acceptance and understanding of gays and their issues.
The Supreme Court and DOMA
When I first wrote this article, the Supreme Court was deliberating the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). On June 26, 2015, they passed the Marriage Equality Act which supersedes DOMA. The following paragraph is just for reference now that the Marriage Equality Act has been passed.
The Supreme Court is currently deliberating about whether they should rule the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) as unconstitutional. Whatever their ruling is, the real issue is not about the sanctity of marriage between only heterosexual couples and their children. The real issue is one of equal civil rights at the federal level.
Case Study
My wife worked for an estate attorney who did trusts. She told me the story of a couple who had been together for many years. One partner was in the hospital for a terminal condition. The hospital would not allow the partner to visit the other partner in the ICU because she was not next of kin. They said she had no legal right. When she passed away, she was not able to inherit any of her partner's property and assets. It all went to the next of kin, even though there was a trust established. She could have inherited it however, if she could come up with the funds to pay the estate tax, which was several thousands dollars. If they were a legally married couple, it would have been zero. As a result, she was left with nothing.
Now with the passing of the Marriage Equality Act, gay people who get legally married will not ever have to face this situation again. However, there are those with certain religious convictions who refuse to grant licenses to gays. It will be interesting to see how this unfolds.
Legal Civil Rights
It's about legal civil rights of people who live together and should be given the same legal rights as married couples. If they have children, it gives the children their legitimate rights as well. When 50% of marriage ends in divorce, who is to say having same sex parents is better or worse than heterosexual parents. There are 1,138 benefits, rights and protections provided on the basis of marital status in Federal law.
The following link is a summary of several categories of federal laws contingent upon marital status.