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Higher the Secret Service to Replace Bernacke.

Updated on April 27, 2012

1,450,240 pesos


Higher the Secret Service to Replace Bernacke.

I rarely watch television anymore. I can’t as it makes me laugh too hard. This latest blast about the Secret Service Agents higher prostitutes and supposedly agreeing to an $800 dollar fee and then skipping out only paying $3 is hysterical. I realize Columbia is our ally for oil but really? This story is very fishy to say the least.

Apparent only in Cartagena a prostitute doesn’t ask for the money up front. This exist no other place in the world. Good faith prostitutes in every other country get ripped off so why would Cartagena expect anything different? Who is this prostitute who has so much power to get a Secret Service Agent who would die for the President fired because he stiffed her? Most prostitutes ask for the money up front immediately before rendering services. There is a compelling argument that the prostitute was over charging for her services and thought she would get away with it. As seen in the picture above this is not a young prostitute so again why so naive?

And then there is the amount of money the prostitute charged. $800 for a little love in Cartagena? $800 in Cartagena buys buildings. The Secret Service Agent must have thought she was joking. Has anyone figured the exchange rate of $800 dollars and what it could buy in Cartagena? I have for each USD the exchange rate is approximately 1,812.8 pesos according to CIA world fact check. That means the secret service agent would have paid this elderly call girl 1,450,240 pesos. That is a lot of pesos for her profession. So a prostitute who clearly over valued her services thought she had tricked the Secret Service Agent into paying an absorbent amount of money for her services at the North American tax payers expense and she gets mad when he only pays her fair market value for her services which is approximately 5,438.40 pesos which is a nice hall for a lady of the night.


Personally I think the Secret Service is suppose to remain a secret and therefore this should have never been aired but now that it has….I would like to go over some of the finer points.

1) A prostitute in North America doesn’t receive $800 for her services unless she is a very good prostitute. I know I live near several. And if a prostitute is a very good prostitute they do not tend to live in Cartagena. So this is completely illogical from my perspective. No offense to Cartagena in general I am certain their prostitution is world class.

2) The amount of money is absorbent. It is an obscene amount of money especially

in an economically depressed region of the world where a third of the population is unemployed. If the story were the Secret Service bought a kilo of coke for $800 it might be more believable. But I just can’t believe the Secret Service is in trouble for not over paying a prostitute to the sum of 1,450,240 pesos. He could build a school with that amount of money.

3) $3 for a prostitute in Cartagena is fair market value. And it doesn’t soak North

America. It is the price of a lottery ticket. It is reasonable.

4) Good faith prostitution in which the prostitute doesn’t receive payment up front

went out with the dark ages. Even in my hood the lady’s of the evening obtain funding before providing services. It is a good lesson for all of Cartagena to learn. Secret Service has provided a valuable education to the prostitutes of this region.

My Recommendations for the Secret Service

1) I would like them to replace the Fed Chairman Ben Bernacke as they are good stewards of the North American peoples’ money and understand Fair Market Value of services.

2) The agent who only paid the $3 should be rehired immediately and be sanctioned to run all the brothels in DC and receive the Medal of Freedom.

3) Napolitano should stop making excuse and own up to the fact the Secret Service exercise good fiscal discipline unlike GSA.

4) The Secret Service should go back to being a Secret Agency and no longer be subject to public scorn or ridicule. They taught a prostitute a good valuable lesson perhaps she will reconsider her life and obtain a degree or apply at the Secret Service. So is looking a little long in the tooth and looks like she needs a new vocation anyways.

In Conclusion

In Conclusion I find this story to be completely implausible since one Cartagena prostitute is not worth impugning the reputation of the Secret Service especially when they have acted as good stewards and been fiscally responsible with the North American peoples’ money. That can’t be said of every agency…GSA..GSA..GSA!!! And prostitution no matter which country you are from is a very difficult life and you have to be very savvy to survive in it. I say the Secret Service did this prostitute a favor and taught her her fair market value and to obtain her pay before services are rendered. Secret Service has been good fiscal stewards of the peoples’ money so I say higher them all back and given them Bernacke’s position.


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    • JT Walters profile image

      JT Walters 5 years ago from Florida

      Hi Cherlyone,

      It has been a while. It is only my opinion but I would have been more upset if the secret service had paid her 1.5 million pesos. I always have a little bit of a different perspective then the news. Thanks for reading and commenting. Your are a brave one my friend.


    • cherylone profile image

      Cheryl Simonds 5 years ago from Connecticut

      All I can say is WOW! Nice job! And yup, you were right about the prostitute.

    • JT Walters profile image

      JT Walters 5 years ago from Florida

      I knew you would agree American Romance if no one else did. I am glad you understood it was a metaphor. Thanks for the vote!!!


    • American Romance profile image

      American Romance 5 years ago from America

      nice analogy! voted up!