- Politics and Social Issues
Jealousy Is Rottenness to the Bones
Before I begin, let's first define jealousy. Giving a definition might seem elementary, but humor me here, there might be an aspect of it that you're unfamiliar with.
From Wikipedia I found a satisfactory definition: "Jealousy is an emotion and typically refers to the negative thoughts and feelings of insecurity, fear, and anxiety over an anticipated loss of something that the person values, such as a relationship, friendship, or love. Jealousy often consists of a combination of emotions such as anger, sadness, and disgust. Jealousy differs from envy in that jealousy is about something one has and is afraid of losing, while envy refers to something one does not have and either wants to acquire or to prevent another from acquiring." The quote is verbatim from Wikipedia.
Another definition from a Webster's dictionary. Jealous: Intolerant of rivalry or unfaithfulness, hostile toward a rival or one believed to enjoy an advantage, distrustfully watchful, etc. Jealousy: A jealous disposition, attitude, or feeling etc.
There is a specific type of jealousy called, delusional jealousy. "Delusional jealousy, Morbid jealousy, or Othello syndrome is a psychiatric disorder in which a person holds a delusional belief that their spouse or sexual partner is being unfaithful." Very scary!
Actually I got the title for this hub from a scripture in the Bible, (I'm just saying).
Getting that, (research), out of the way, now I muse. This is one of the deepest, darkest, most frightening, topics that I've taken on to date, so I'll do my usual, and try to keep it as light as possible, using my signature scenarios.
Jealousy can be found in all types of relationships. In familial, it includes, spousal, sibling, and parental. It can also be found in the workplace, the recreational arena, which would include, sports, school playground, etc. In addition, it can be found among friends, neighbors, acquaintances, etc. Any situation where two people come together can spark jealousy. If I see that this hub is getting a little long I'll make a sequel. Deal! Here goes.
To begin, let's establish a few characters. They are, Suspicious Sam and his wife Innocent Irene. How about Little Bad Bobby, and his Sweet Sister Suzy. Here we have Wanna Be Model Mother Mary, and Model Daughter Daisy. What about workmates, Diligent Danny and Slacker Steve. On to Best Athlete Adam and rival, Second Best, Brian. Okay, now to good friends, I Got the Best Betsy and, I Could Care Less Carrie. Okay one more, Nasty Neighbor Ned, and Kind Hearted Ken. When we say that jealousy is rottenness to the bone, some of these characters will prove that beyond a shadow of a doubt.
Let's explore the relationship between Suspicious Sam and his wife Innocent Irene. Suspicious Sam is by all accounts a pretty good looking guy, and Innocent Irene has always been considered easy on the eye. In his single years, Suspicious Sam was known to have an eye for the ladies, at times having more than one girlfriend at a time. Sweet Innocent Irene, has always only had eyes for Suspicious Sam. Because Irene was very attractive, innocently she's always attracted stares from both men and women, which annoyed Sam. In time Irene has their first child, gaining a substantial amount of weight, Sam is not too put out about that. Leaving out all the particulars, Irene loses the weight after about a year, looking pretty much the way she use to. Sam, asks, why she's losing weight, forgetting that her physical features were what attracted him in the first place. He begins to question her every move, even her trips to the supermarket. He shows up at home unexpectedly. On outings, even a simple hello from any man, even the grocery clerk, sparks angry outbursts from Sam. No amount of convincing from Irene seems to console Sam. The marriage suffers.
Let's switch this around a little bit and make Irene the Jealous one. Sam's very friendly and outgoing. Never thinking about another woman, maybe not giving Irene the attention that he use to, nevertheless no other woman interests him. In her eyes, every woman is a threat, and she acts on her suspicions, alienating anyone that she perceives as a viable threat. Winding up friendless, due to her suspicions.
Now we have Little Bad Bobby and his Sweet Sister Suzy. Bobby is the first born, Suzy came about two years later. Bobby was always the center of attention. Then comes Suzy, cute as a button, the center of attention of all, but his parents always tries to treat both fairly. However Suzy has such a winning personality, that all outsiders are drawn to her. Bobby is spoiled, selfish, self-centered, and not easy to warm to, (oh, yeah, you can say that about a kid). Both are old enough, (about 6 & 8), to know what they are doing. Well anyway, whenever Sweet Sister Suzy gets a compliment within earshot of Little Bad Bobby, he takes offense and does all in his power to make her life miserable. For instance, once when both were in the presence of grandmother, with grandmother trying to elicit conversation from both. Suzy responds, Bobby does not. He sulks in the corner not talking, while Suzy and grandmother carry on a lively conversation. Sweet Suzy tries, without success to bring Bad Bobby into the conversation, to no avail. Bobby leaves the room, not returning for awhile. When he returns, this time with a coy little smile, even contributing to the conversation, a little. Grandmother wonders why, oh well, at least he warmed up a bit. Well, guess why. Okay, I'll tell you. After grandmother leaves, Sweet Suzy goes into her room, all of a sudden, mother hears a blood curdling scream coming from Suzy's room. Mother runs to see what causes it. Baaaad Bobby has torn all the heads off all of Suzy's Barbie dolls and pulled out all of the hair. Need I say more!
Let's explore the relationship between Wanna Be Model Mother Mary and Model Daughter Daisy. Both women are beautiful, tall, leggy, smooth creamy complexion, gorgeous hair and all the characteristics required for a model. Although Wanna Be Model Mother Mary's time has passed to be a high fashion model, she does get work as the mother type, which doesn't suit her. However, Model Daughter Daisy has all the work that she can handle. Did I mention that Daisy has low self esteem, from years of Mary's constant put downs. Mary never misses a chance to point out Daisy's supposed flaws, such as her slightly crooked nose, which nobody but the two of them notice. Or her hair that is not as luxurious as her mother's, (Daisy occasionally wears extensions). Well during a particularly stressful photo shoot for Daisy, (she's looking especially stunning). Wanna Be Model Mother Mary is in rare form, on her usual tyrannical tirade, (green eyed monster at work). "You see if your hair was a little thicker, you wouldn't have to add these things to it, (pointing to Daisy's hair extensions), and oh my goodness you've put on weight, (not), and what's wrong with your toenails, didn't you get a pedicure,"............. and on, and on. Daisy has been on the verge of a breakdown already, and this does not help. She runs from the shoot in utter frustration. Mary, "now what's wrong with her, if she can't hack it, perhaps I can fill in," she says to the photographer, who looks on in complete shock. Their relationship continues on a downward spiral.
Let's sneak in another couple. Good Son George, and Jealous Dad Jack. George has had a good relationship with his mother, from birth, not so much with Jack. Jack has never given George a break, always criticizing everything about him, up to and including the care that he gives to his mother. George always does everything that jack tells him, but nothing he does is ever good enough. Jealous Dad Jack takes an opportunity to take Good Son George down a peg, in front of all at a family picnic, by slyly calling into question his manhood, says, "Hey George, here's your apron, oh and by the way you might want to look in the mirror and check on your hair." Silence falls on the crowd, everyone looks on in embarrassment for both, George and Jack. No one is laughing.
Can we continue
Well this hub is getting a little long. I think we should continue in another hub. Don't you! I said at the outset that if it got a little long I'd break and continue later. So now, do you want to know what happens with the other characters? If so, let me know with your comments.
Part II is here
- JEALOUSY IS ROTTENNESS TO THE BONES, PART II
This is a continuation of an article that I previously wrote, entitled,
© 2009 Alfreta Sailor