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Robbed! Pros and Cons
Robbery...home Invasion...burglary. But by any name, being robbed can be a good thing.
No one wants to be robbed, of course, or suffer the feelings of violation of personal space on top of the loss of expensive electronics and/or items valuable only to you and yours.
It happened to us because we were too trusting.
We were, after all, in a tiny town in rural Oklahoma where people still leave their doors unlocked at night, in plain sight of a busy restaurant and even busier convenience store. After dark, one or the other of two city cops keeps an eye out for suspicious activity - not difficult when the entire town is six blocks long and four blocks wide.
During the summer, my son and daughter-in-law had rented an extra bedroom to one of his co-workers. But D-I-L was hoping to get a job too, so dependable childcare for my grandson was essential if he and she were on overlapping shifts.
The obvious solution was for me to give up my flat in Kansas, move to OK, and become the live-in Granny Nanny. The housemate would have to (and did, willingly) make other arrangements.
The weekend before the robbery, two things happened.
First, to save space in the truck that would haul my "big stuff" from storage, we'd already made a trip from KS with a load of "little stuff"...pots and pans, cooking utensils, etc...and a 5-drawer lingerie chest tied to a roof rack on top of the car. Shades of "The Beverly Hillbillies" or The Grapes of Wrath...
Second, unbeknown to us, the housemate was wanted in the State of Tennessee on an outstanding warrant for DWI. Sometime during the weekend, he was picked up and transported back to TN for a 30-day "vacation". Moving his stuff out...including his bed and his mother's washer and dryer...fell to the mother, whom we'd also met and trusted. She arrived an hour after we left for Kansas for the rest of my stuff.
We returned two days later to a nearly empty house.
Our mistake was leaving the house unoccupied while we were so far away.
Being a tiny town where it was public knowledge that Housemate was moving out and I was moving in, TVs and such being carried out by the mom's druggie nephews from the next town raised no alarms among the neighbors or local constabulary. She had her son's key and locked the house after removing only his things and her washer and dryer. She even vacuumed his room before leaving.
The nephews, knowing we couldn't possibly return from KS before sundown the next day, simply came back in the morning with a crowbar, forced the back door open, and helped themselves to our things.
All the electronics, of course, were gone. Two
TVs...the stereo and its rather large speakers... my son's desktop
computer and computer stand...my nearly-new wireless router...dozens of
DVDs and video games.
Also many non-electronics that one wouldn't think were worth stealing:
- ALL my aforementioned pots and pans and cooking utensils.
- A small crock I'd had for at least 25-years that held cooking utensils next to the stove.
- ALL the silverware and the tray it in.
- A brand-new set of potholders.
- 10 lbs of sugar in a rather expensive container designed to hold 10 lbs of sugar.
- The larger of two coffee makers, but not the nearly full can of coffee or filters next to it.
- A cheap wall clock that my daughter-in-law had had since childhood.
- From the bathroom, a fully-stocked first-aid kit and an unopened giant-economy size package of really good toilet paper (but they left the package of cheapie paper).
- From the back bedroom, a bedside lamp and the aforementioned 5-drawer lingerie chest as well as the roof rack used to bring it from KS.
Oddly, none of the baby's things were taken, nor were a brand-new, still-in-the-box juicer and two fairly new crock pots.
The young, laid-back officer who came to take the report seemed as shocked as we were.
"How much crime do you have here?", I asked.
"Until now...none."
(Technically, that's not true. According to a site that keeps track of such things, our tiny town is a virtual hotbed of criminal activity...because the site lumps misdemeanors such as letting one's dog run loose, public intoxication, parking in a no-parking zone, or speeding in a school zone in with real crimes like domestic violence and home invasion. We just happened to be his first home invasion.)
Listing the missing items was a challenge. My son hadn't bothered to record the brand, model or serial number of any of the electronics and my things hadn't been in the house long enough for their absence to be noticed. Nor did we have photos of any of the stolen items.
In other words, we could not prove any of the items were legally ours.
Then there was the issue of multiple jurisdictions. The stolen items had been taken from a home inside the city limits, not outside, which would've put it in the jurisdiction of the county sheriff. The nephews lived in a different town in the same county, but without serial numbers or other proof of our ownership, its much larger police force could not search their homes for our stuff.
So what could possibly be "good" about being robbed?
First, it's a great lesson in priorities. We only lost possessions, not our lives.
Second, it's a great way to get rid of things you couldn't bring yourself to toss or replace.
One of the TVs, for instance, had a crappy picture no matter the channel, even with cable. My much older TV (which, thankfully, had been in storage in KS) had, and still has, a much sharper picture, but doesn't have the plug-ins on the front that my son swore by to connect the DVD and video games players, instead of having to reach around to connect them to the back. Wahhh...
Without the TVs, stereo, desktop computer, and other electronics plugged in and sucking electricity 24/7, the electric bill immediately went down by almost two-thirds.
Being robbed can also be an on-going source of humor.
Whenever we can't find something, the first question is not 'where did you see it last?', but when. If BTR (before the robbery), might as well smile and go on, because whatever it is probably gone forever. And we can chuckle that the roof rack is useless to the perps, because they overlooked one of the rubber suction cups that secures it to the top of a car. Somehow, by not keeping all four suction cups together, we put one over on them. hahahaha.
We've also learned that life can go on without "convenience" appliances like an electric can opener. (A Mr. Coffee, even a small one, is the exception.) Or that a pizza pan can be used as a lid on a skillet that no longer has one. (The perps left us one ancient skillet, one stew pot, and one sauce pan, but took the lids.)
And last but not least, being robbed gives us a valid reason to comb thrift shops and yard sales for replacement items at a fraction of retail. In fact, the very next weekend at a sale a block away, I bought a much nicer lingerie chest...for $1. Woohoo!
Comments
We were robbed when I was a little girl, and I still remember the fear walking into our dark home and noticing all the things that were gone - the T.V., a lamp, all the meat in the freezer, etc. The thieves took some things that just didn't make sense, but I think in some ways, it was a blessing in disguise for my parents then too. Just as you've described.
Great job finding the humor in the situation and just carrying on! I love the idea that the perps cannot use your roof rack! LOL
I guess you were just lucky, JamaGenee. You wouldn't believe what I went through trying to deal with years of accumulated paraphernalia. First we had to separate what was good from what had to be thrown out. Then we ran a tag sale for a couple of days. Then we had to separate what was left over to see what would be worth donating and what would be easier to discard. Then we had to make lots of calls to Good Will, the Salvation Army and other charities. Then a kindly neighbor agreed to take some of the items to the town dump, but there was obviously a communications mix-up and, lo and behold, the whole lot was taken to the town dump! I had the same reaction as you: At least the problem had some good points. The problem no longer existed. I enjoyed reading this hub. Thumbs up!
The most important thing about your home's burglary is indeed no loss of life. Material things can be replaced. The lives of loved ones (pets included) cannot. I could emotionally get over having my personal possessions stolen. I could not emotionally get over having the perps hurt or kill my cat or any other living member of my household in the process.
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Steph, my D-I-L was the first to enter the house, but even in broad daylight she had roughly the same reaction as you as a little girl. It was weeks before we determined all that was missing.
Bill, my sympathies that the things you intended to keep went to the dump along with those you didn't. I was lucky in that regard because my *most* precious possessions (family heirlooms, photo albums and such) were still in storage in KS when the robbery occurred. I'd also tossed or given away everything I could live without as I packed up my apartment so that what was left would fit in one U-Haul truck.
Tammy, I was surprised at how quickly I got over the loss of the things that were stolen. However, 10+ years later, I still miss the cat that died (of natural causes).
Wow Jama-- talk about making lemonade out of life's lemons-- this hub is not just good, it is downright inspirational :-) Good job!!!
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Thanks, robie. The robbery happened a couple of months ago, so the initial anger and sense of helplessness have been tempered by time.
We were robbed years ago, and this hub struck a familiar note for me.. Gone were some irreplaceable items, and some that were just darned trash.. like an obviously broken Kodak 110 camera of mine. My sister had a snow ski outfit where the pants zipped into the jacket (no waistband). They took the pants.. bright yellow with a lime-green stripe. Yours took the good toilet paper and left the cheap stuff! Hahaha! (sorry this is just too funny!)
My heart is with you, and it as you say the emotions have tempered, the thoughts will be there for a long long time... Hugs!!
My apartment in N.Y. was burgled twice. The second time, I walked in on the guy who, unbeknownst to me, went out the front 5th floor window, down the fire escape, and dropped one floor to the store awning at street level. Although I remember a roommate losing some jewelry, the only thing I can remember losing was my high school ring, which was, of course, worthless to anyone else. Still, I felt violated.
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LW, stealing only the ski pants and not the jacket makes as much sense as our perps taking the lids, but not the cookware they went on. "Your" perp either had a fondness for bright yellow and lime-green stripes, or only took half the ski outfit out of spite. Being cousins of the former housemate, we're pretty sure our perps took some of the items purely to be spiteful.
Christoph, of course you felt violated! That's exactly how one is supposed to feel when things are taken without your consent, whether it was "only" a class ring or everything you own(ed).
Man I understand! It is incredible to know someone was in your place. I'm just thankful you weren't there, or walked in on them! We were robbed once, too.. the perps took my father's antique rifles.. they belonged to his mom when she was a kid. The perps called the cops and told them where they were stashed. I know, right! He got them back and unharmed.. Mom's wedding ring never came back.. thankfully neither did my obviously broken Kodak 110 camera. Idiots.
What makes less sense.. they were caught and the judge let them go cuz they said they'd be good. (huh??) and then recaught trying to get on a fishing boat for Alaska. Sheesh.
Another "good thing" to come of this is that it is OVER, not looming in the future. The feeling of violation would be tremendous...and long-lingering...even though they also took worthless things out of spite! I'm glad it's over and you've been able to get over it so well!
So THAT is what has been happening in your life recently! What an unpleasant experience this was. But I am surprised that jurisdiction is such an issue over there, when catching a criminal... I am really sorry for this unpleasantness you and your family have been through ...
I love it that you were able to treat such a violation with humor. I think it was wise of you to wait a couple of months after the event before writing about it. Humor comes only after distancing oneself. Great hub!
I am so, so glad no one was injured!
it still sounds pretty horrible, having people in your private space pawing through your stuff.
Have they been arrested?
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Nope, no arrests yet...and probably never will be. )-:
Nobody robs me, nobody messes with me, well they do if they want to reap the shit but hey Happy New Year to someone I just adore, me, only joking, you x
brilliant. not: 'oh, woe is me.' but 'what can we learn?' don't let it change you.
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Thanks, drood!
Hi JG, traveling as you do gives you perspective because you see things from others' viewpoints and losing your possessions gives you a similar change of viewpoint. I recently had reason to downsize and I find that having fewer possessions helps me learn that the things that really matter in life aren't things at all. In fact, the more things you have, the more they have of you. It is freeing yourself from them that lets you concentrate on what really adds to your life. I'll try to put it in verse:
The more that I possessed
The less I had of me
And when I let them go
The freer I would be
I saw them more as means
And less and less as ends
And the less I thought of things
The more I saw my friends
I came naked into this world
And that's the way I'll go
What remains is the love you leave
In the hearts of those you know
All my best. =:)
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Beautiful, Winsome! Thanks!
Whoa I guess Winsome says it all beautifully. I recently downsized after my nest was empty. Some by choice and some by circumstance. I don't really miss anything or remember some things I had. Of course I kept my pictures and memories but I got everything down to 21 boxes of stuff i couldn't live without. You have a great attitude, keep it up forever. The older we get the more I treasures change. I enjoyed your hub.
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Thanks, denise! And a round of applause to you for being able to part with everything except 21 boxes. Took me many years to learn that STUFF (except for for absolute necessities) really keeps us tied not only to a physical location, but STUCK in a way of life that may not be in our best interest.
Much good information here in this Hub. We all have learned something. Sorry to hear of your misfortune. Wasn't it great fun buying at yard sales and thrift shops.
Great that you could concentrate on the positives of this nasty experience. It must be worse than being robbed if a person breaks in and valdalises your home
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Aside from the sense of being violated, the sheer pettiness of taking items like pot holders and cooking spoons was the most shocking part of it.
Hi, I am so glad you saw the funny side, I think I would too, only of course if nobody had been hurt, or nothing really valuable to you was taken, I, like you have old things that have stopped working, an old tv, a dvd player that eats the dvds, a so called music system that only plays tapes, and then chews them, and so on, so if they want to come round here, well, they are welcome! lol but seriously, I am glad no one was hurt, nell
I remember coming home to find the window in the front door busted out. I don't recall all they took, but I remember the TV and cable box. The TV was replaced inexpensively, but the cable company charged me something like $125 for the box (that's like $250,000 in today's money)!
They didn't hurt my dog who did his best to try to make the burglar slip in his pee. He tried to console me by letting me know that the guy wasn't all bad. I'm sure he said "he gave me some of the cookies he stole from you!"
I put up a sign that said "Survivors caught in my house will be prosecuted upon their release from the hospital." It was up for a couple of weeks before somebody stole it.
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Tom, how funny (now)...the dog falling for the stolen cookies bit! We had a similar experience with the cable company, despite providing several copies of the police report which I suspect allowed THEM to be reimbursed by THEIR insurance company but charging us for replacement box.
Well OF COURSE, thieves stole your "Survivors will be prosecuted" sign! If they were bright enough to come up with a similar sign on their own, they wouldn't be burglarizing the homes of law-abiding citizens! ;D
Old Rocky was a good dog, but he was a better companion than he was protection!
I'll admit now that the sign was really from another break-in, and it wasn't really stolen. I just figured the story was better if I didn't let facts get in the way!
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Re Old Rocky: lol! Same for fessin' up about the sign. Yes, in this case ignoring the facts did make the story better! ;D
You have a great sense of humor. Back when we were newly married I kept some old collectible coins from my grandfather in an old piggy bank on a closet shelf in an apartment we were renting. One day (who knows how long after?) I was looking at the coins and ALL of the valuable ones were gone...leaving just the invaluable ones. We never even reported it because we couldn't even say with any kind of accuracy at to when the crime happened. Scary thing is that whoever did it surely took their time! I worked in the operating room all day and my husband was gone on his job...so our apt. was vacant during the day. Many people would have had keys. I had never even had them appraised, but some were tiny gold pieces; half cent pieces, etc. Very old. Should have kept them in a safety deposit box! Oh well! Live and learn.
Would rather have had old pot holders and good toilet paper stolen. Ha!
Hopefully nothing worse will ever again happen to you or me. It is a wierd feeling knowing that someone was in your home without permission and stealing your things.
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Peggy, what an expensive lesson! Most of the things we lost do pale in comparison, but nonetheless were "valuable" to us because they were items one never expects to have to replace unless one chooses to. I was just thankful irreplaceable treasures like old family photos and true heirlooms were still in storage, although it still rankles that I've (so far) not been able to replace a certain Teflon skillet that was a particular favorite. The feeling of violation, though, never goes away.
I agree. Just knowing that someone was rifling through our things and that they would have even found the coins meant that they were going through things with a fine toothed comb. They also would have been fairly certain that they knew our habits and knew that they had plenty of time. Not a good feeling! Hope you find a similar or even better Teflon skillet someday soon to replace the one stolen from you.
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It's an icky feeling to know that somebody was pawing through *your* stuff. At least my undies were with me and not in the 5-drawer chest!
I too know how it feesl to be robbed. IT is very unsettling at best. We now have good security in our home at a fine cost I might add.
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Unfortunately, a good security system only works IF all those who enter legally turn it back on when they leave. In this instance, that wouldn't have been the case. One of us should've stayed behind to not only supervise the moving of the roommate's stuff but also be IN the house afterwards. ;D
Good hub full of information.
I travel a lot and feel concerned about cash and passport. Sometime, I am out-witted. Once, I found $200 missing from safetybox provided by my hotel. One time, there was a gang to rob me with one dropping before me and other helping me from tripping.
Often, there are imposters in the garb of 'intelligence officers' forcing me to show them foreign currency in a rather secluded place in a no-man land between borders of two countries like Kenya and Tanzania.
Looks like, it is risk one has to face, sooner or later, in lumpsum or piecemeal, from strangers or beloved ones.
So I keep $200 as provision for such eventualities and if I save it, I spend it on a dinner with family members Naturally I do not get stuff worth $200 and again think "I have been robbed".
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Yes, hafeezrm, there's always someone out there who wants what we have and just takes it. But one feels especially violated when possessions are taken from one's home.
As for thwarting thieves when traveling, I take extra precautions 1) not make myself a target, and 2) never ever leave anything of value in a hotel room OR hotel safe. If I can't carry it *safely* on my person, I leave it at home! ;D
I would imagine apart from the fact that you had been robbed the idea of a stranger wondering about your house and handling your things would be very unsettling.
JamaGenee . . .GREAT HUB! Nice read, graphics and wisdom found in this hub. Thank YOU for sharing this with us. You are a true talent.
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Thank you, Ken. So are YOU (a true talent)! ;D
Very definitely an optimist - I like your attitude. I bet it smarted at the time though :o(
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"Smarted" is not a word I would never thought of using in this situation, but it fits. Thanks!
As always when it comes to your writing, I enjoyed this read tremendously. There aren't too many who can make lemonade out of those lemons, and your humor really carried your excellent advice, one bit of which I'm going to act on now...inventorying the house. Voted up, funny, and useful!
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Thanks, Sherri. And YOU just reminded ME that I haven't recorded the serial number and such of my laptop and new camera! (Actually, I'll use the camera to snap a pic of the underside of the laptop, which eliminates transposing numbers!) ;D
Speaking as a lawyer, and therefore a legal pedant, in the UK, "robbery" means stealing + violence or the threat of violence, and "burglary" is stealing from buildings. Is it different in the USA?
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Hello again, LG! In the U.S., "burglary" and "robbery" are used interchangeably when referring to the theft of one's possessions by person or persons unknown from one's home, vehicle or business. But if a perp is caught, I believe the actual charge is "burglary" if no violence or threat of violence is involved, but "robbery" if it is. Thanks for pointing out the distinction. ;D
It's also used generally in the UK, for example the prices for sandwiches on trains are "daylight robbery", and a side who lose at football might declare, "we was robbed!"
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Exactly. Only local laws and prosecuting attorneys make a distinction between burglary and robbery. "Robbed" is the most commonly word to describe when something is taken (or in the case of the price of the sandwiches, extracted) from you without your permission. The title "Burgled! Pros and Cons" didn't have the right ring to it, and I can't ever recall anyone whose house was broken into saying "We were burgled". ;D
Ah, it is a bit different, then, here. Because people would definitely say, "I was burgled" here. If they were in that unfortunate position, obviously!
And people who do the burgling are always called "burglars", too.
eg
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-norfolk-15305...
But theft from shops here is pretty much always called "shoplifting", although that's not a legal term, only a public one. And robbery from the person is called "mugging", but again, it's not a legal term.
Hi, just came by to say thanks for the comment on my hub, I couldn't answer because the comment boxes were'nt working! seems that it is at the moment, but who knows when it will go down again! lol I felt lost last night trying to comment, hopefully the glitch is over now!!
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Nell, I went offline yesterday afternoon and when I logged back on this morning wondered why my inbox wasn't full of comments on hubs I follow. It's sooooo frustrating when the comment function doesn't function! Thanks for the heads up. Apparently it's fixed...for now... ;D
Hi, Jama, it drove me mad! lol I was typing away madly and all of a sudden the whole page just shot up to the top! so I tried again, and again, and then gave up! its because hubstaff have changed something, can't remember exactly what, but its causing all sorts of trouble!
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Peggy, the same thing happened to me a few weeks ago! Type away and then POOF! Comment gone! Ever since then, if HP is acting "hinky", I'll hi-lite and copy the entire comment before hitting Post Comment, just in case. Sure wish the HP Team would figure out WHY this happens when they change something supposedly unrelated to commenting!
Hi Jama... well I must say you were both lucky and unlucky at the same time. No one ever enjoys getting robbed. In the old days in the Yukon in the far north of Canada I had two signs as you drove up my driveway... the first said Private Property."
Should you continue a second sign near the cabin read "You ave now entered the land of the 12 gauge haircut."
That was before I became civilized and more cordial. Now I just use an central alarm system. Less messy that way.
Great hub and marked up and across the board.
Hugs from Canada
Hi Jama, well, you sure seem to know how to put a positive spin on things! We were robbed this year in our apartment for the first time in the 11 years we lived here. Funny thing is, the guy (hmm, I guess I shouldn't assume it was a guy) took an odd selection of stuff-- mostly bags, as in suitcase-type bags, duffels. We wonder if maybe he was headed somewhere to steal marijuana & needed containers. Meanwhile, hello. I found you via billbuc, I'm a newbie, less than a month old. I think you should write a hub about how you amassed over 1,000 followers with only 42 hubs. Not that 42 is miniscule, but it seems small for that many followers. Are you the queen of promotion?
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Hi Louisa and welcome to Hubpages! Yes, what an odd selection of items your perp took, although he (she?) might've just needed the bags to move his own belongings. (Who ever really knows how such people think...)
As for your last question, you get a gold star for being the first to wonder, at least in print. I wouldn't call myself the "queen of promotion" as I don't actively do so. I prefer quality over quantity and try to write "ever green" hubs - hubs that don't have a short shelf life like, say, a hub about what my neighborhood looked like after a hurricane.
Also, I shy away from writing keyword-heavy hubs. Hubbing has always only been a hobby, not a means to pay the bills, so I only write a hub when I get the urge.
But perhaps the real secret to having so many followers with so few hubs is that many of them have come over after reading a comment I've left on the hubs of others. That said, I've been working on a big project and haven't visited HP as often as I normally do, so I was tickled to see a new comment on an older hub. Thanks! ;D
This was some experience! And definitely a useful lesson. You made me realize one important thing that we all need to do - and that is to record the brand, model or serial number of all our electronics equipment. That list can be stored away and would come in very useful in case of a robbery.
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