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Should the United States Torture Its Enemies?

Updated on May 2, 2023
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Evidence and data aren't good enough

Despite overwhelming evidence that torture is ineffective in fighting terrorism, liberals continue to use such evidence and data to whine and cry that torture is ineffective in fighting terrorism and that the United States shouldn't use torture as a method to extract information because it will somehow damage our standing the world. This whining completely obscures the fact that many people think torture is effective and that even though data doesn't support this conclusion, people really like the idea of hurting bad people and making them suffer. In other words, if torture saves just one American life, then it's worth it.

It also just seems obvious that if you twist somebody's genitals long enough, they're going to tell you the truth. Despite what data may reveal about twisting somebody's genitals, it's pretty obvious to everyone that if their genitals were twisted, they would tell the truth. So, it stands to reason that torture probably makes people tell you things they wouldn't otherwise. And since terrorists want to defeat us with terror, it only seems right that they get as good as they give. Am I right?

Further, despite the conclusions of the Senate report, the CIA director and Dick Cheney have denounced the report, proving that the report isn't true since both the CIA director and Dick Cheney know whether torture works or not.

Torture in the 16th Century. Looks fun! (public domain)
Torture in the 16th Century. Looks fun! (public domain)

Should America torture its captured enemies?

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First of all, what America is doing to its enemies isn't torture, it's "enhanced interrogation techniques". These techniques, or if it helps to think about what actually happens even less, EIT's - these EIT's (really it sounds like a collection of nice stocks you could purchase) are critical to America's mission of ridding the world of terrorism. The more we use EIT's, the safer we will be. When we question the use of EIT's, our enemies start figuring out ways to conquer us. When we question EIT's, we question America. Therefore, not torturing terrorists is un-American.

The reasons we're even discussing the use of EIT's is the Senate Intelligence Committee's recently release report on CIA interrogation techniques. That report basically provides the fodder for whiny liberals to complain that torture doesn't work and call for things like diplomacy and humanity, which are torture to some people, frankly. Ever sat for several days trying to be diplomatic with somebody who wants to kill you? It's torture. Believe me.

Below is a video from Dick Cheney, who authorized these EIT's during his Vice Presidency. There's no greater proof than Cheney that EIT's worked. As he says, and you can watch the video, even though he hasn't read the report, he knows it's full of crap just like he knows that EIT's work. There is no greater champion of American freedom, truth, and knowledge than Dick Cheney. Knowing something works trumps data and science any day of the week. Incidentally, Dick Cheney also knows that evolution is a bunch of hooey and that climate change is an effort among scientists to trick us into giving them more money.

Other uses for EIT's

Assuming America is just fine with EIT's, it becomes incumbent upon us as a nation and a people to put these techniques to full use, utilizing them to make society a better place. Why not apply EIT's in every day life? Why not allow police officers, who are really getting a bad rap these days, to use EIT's when they're questioning suspects or stopping people on minor traffic offenses?

Let's say that there's been a robbery at a neighborhood Walmart and the store manager calls the police. The store manager tells the police that a group of teenage thugs came into his store and stole something. The police drive around and not far from the Walmart, discover these thugs loitering in front of a liquor store, drinking malt liquor, smoking marijuana, and listening to rap music on a music system that's obviously more expensive than they can afford and has a Walmart sales sticker on it. And here's the kicker: these people look really suspicious. When the police officer asks them where they got the music system, they tell him that they purchased it. What can the cop do?

Well, imagine if he could use EIT's! He could simply take these hooligans aside, taser them, threaten to murder their families, or force objects into various parts of their bodies. Wouldn't this greatly increase the chance that these thugs would tell the officer the truth and admit that they stole something? Wouldn't this greatly reduce crime and quickly become a deterrent to anybody thinking about robbing that Walmart in the future? Of course it would.

Torture during the Holocaust. Looks painful! (public domain)
Torture during the Holocaust. Looks painful! (public domain)

Another Good Example

Now let's imagine you're a police officer near the border, working in a place like El Paso maybe. So you're working your normal beat and you come upon a playground and there on the playground are a bunch of 10-year-olds. These 10-year-olds are speaking Spanish and playing mariachi music and doing nothing that looks remotely American to you.

Now, under the current liberal regime, you can't really do much. However, utilizing EIT's, you could quickly determine whether these young people and their parents are in the country legally. It should be fairly obvious to anyone that when you threaten to murder a 10-year-old's entire family or strip him naked and hook electrodes to his nipples, he will tell you just about anything you need to know. Put a gun to the head of a 10-year-old and it's pretty certain his parents will tell you anything you might want to know. What better way to solve our immigration problem?

If you had a secret and somebody twisted your genitals, would you tell them your secret?

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The Use of EIT's for Common Traffic Stops

The above video shows how EIT's are currently being used in Texas for common traffic stops. The 76-year-old man in the video was stopped for having an expired inspection tag. The man's excuse was that he didn't own the car because it was dealer-owned and he wasn't required to have current tags. Who cares? I bet after this encounter the old man will check to make sure his tags are current so he's not violating the law. EIT's clearly reduce the number of law breakers.

The Sad Case of John McCain

If you can believe it, John McCain recently spoke out against the use of EIT's. Being that McCain was a captured soldier himself and was also tortured, you'd think he would realize the value of using EIT's on terrorists. The reason torture didn't work on McCain is that he wasn't a terrorist, so he didn't have anything to tell his captors. Unfortunately, one place where torture clearly did work on McCain is that it's made him soft. He's soft like a roll of Charmin.

Ironically, perhaps EIT's did work on McCain because now he's telling the terrorists exactly the things they want to hear - that EIT's don't work. This just makes our enemies stronger and more willing to attack us.

Torture in China 1904. Looks effective! (public domain)
Torture in China 1904. Looks effective! (public domain)

Conclusion: Slicing and Dicing

It's obvious from the photograph above that torture works. And frankly, if it doesn't work, your enemy is dead or psychologically damaged, so who really cares? If you don't get the information you're looking for, at least your enemy isn't around to cause problems. The fact remains, if you have ten terrorists, one of them might be innocent, but is that innocent person's well-being more important than the information we could extract from the nine others?

People don't consort with terrorists by accident. If some innocent taxi driver gets tortured a little bit, whose fault is that? He should have known that if you hang around bad people, bad things happen to you. America's enemies would have you believe that the torture of some innocent Afghanistan taxi driver is more important than the safety of Americans. It's not.


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