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Life After Tragedy

Updated on February 21, 2014

┬ęcopyright ALL RIGHTS RESERVED 2012

It was never a choice.

I remember the night I received that phone call and hearing his voice tell me that, "she didn't make it." I can recall a terrorizing rage and then time just stopped. My life began again about three days later. It's twenty three years ago and I can recall it as though it was yesterday. That year there were seven kids who had parents die. It was as though a virus had attacked our high school. Just a week before my mother was killed I stood sadly in the lunch line staring at a girl whose father was tragically killed in a construction accident and as I watched her I remember thinking that it seemed as though she had become an outcast. She was somewhere else that the rest of us would never be. And then suddenly I was there too.

©copyright ALL RIGHTS RESERVED 2012
©copyright ALL RIGHTS RESERVED 2012


The worst part of tragically losing my mother at such a young age was that there wasn't a single person who looked me in the eye and told me that everything would be okay. I needed that, desperately. I needed someone who wasn't on "my side of the fence" to let me know that I could still experience some sense of normalcy even though this horrible event had happened but nothing ever came. Make it a habit to let your children know during the worst times that things will always get better. Being a teenager is tough. Being a teenager who experiences a tragedy is probably the strongest test of will and faith. No one asks for their path but it's the one God gave us. Although the fence may not be real to you, it's very real to those of us who live with it every day. It becomes more slight with time and even dissipates now and then. But at certain times it will rear it's walls to remind us of the separation between believing you will always be okay and believing that you will always have to fear late phone calls, people who have something to tell you with a very serious look on their face, allowing your children to live normal lives because a third phone call would surely put you into an asylum somewhere.

Final thought: It's okay to hurt and feel sadness when bad things happen. It's okay to have bad days and recognize that the world isn't always as wonderful as we want and hope it will be. But you must get up off your knees, look up into life and fight to be faster, higher, stronger. You cannot give-up even on your worst or saddest day. Those are the days when God is trying to tell you that you are tough, that there is more out there for you and your calling is still waiting. Keep searching.


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    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 3 years ago from Olympia, WA

      Thank you for sharing this. I lost my father, the anchor of my life, when I was nineteen. It was devastating, and in truth, still today I feel his loss and wish he was here to give me guidance. It is a terrible time and for me, the counsel I needed was lacking...but we get through it all eventually, in our own way, and carve out a new life. Great reflections here, Kristi!

    • krsharp05 profile image

      Kristi Sharp 5 years ago from Born in Missouri. Raised in Minnesota.

      All comments have to be approved. I'll read your poem now!

    • profile image

      Shawn Seiler 5 years ago

      Do you set up your account so that coments have to be aproved before they are seen? I am new to this blogg stuff.....And did you ever read the poem i wrote called "The Stage"? ANd how the hell do i post a new blog on my hub?

    • krsharp05 profile image

      Kristi Sharp 5 years ago from Born in Missouri. Raised in Minnesota.

      Thank you Shawn. I wish that we would have been closer then, I would have talk to you. The great thing is, we talk now and I appreciate you so much.

    • firsttime7 profile image

      firsttime7 5 years ago from Planet Hawaii

      You are an amazing Friend Kristi- I did not even know what happened to your mom in school- I just wondered where you were and missed you. I was so not connected with the other people i went to FHS with that no one I talked to even knew either. I wish I could go back and offer you the support you needed at the time...