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Social Commentary - To Wed or Not

Updated on March 2, 2010

To speak in the colloquial and refer to gay marriage as an issue comparable to heterosexual relations would be to equate the differences for convenience sake. Gay marriage proponent’s rightfully claim a need for equality but are wrong in their understanding of the concepts.

Just as regular marriage is distinct from other forms of relationships and if the gay community is successful with their demands of inclusion and acceptance, they must by right of humanity, succumb to the same constraints which define the opposing views. Exclusivity, separation from all others, forsaking all manner of lasciviousness for the benefit of a partner, are demands which make most traditionalists think long and hard before making a commitment. These conditions are endemic in all situations were people link themselves to one another, whether between parents to children, children to family, men to women, lover to lovers, friend to friend, man to God, citizen to government,or tribe to tribe, man to man.

This is not to say that those who would choose the gay marriage lifestyle are incapable of committing to it. Rather it is in the choice were decision matters most. As with all relationships, loyalty is paramount to its maintenance. Comparisons are useless unless one is equating one for one in like manner. For gay rights activists` to force the issue of equality is problematic, as the comparison with heterosexual marriage remains an inconvenient item whose plausibility is questionable. Lacking examples of fidelity, there remains no evidence available to them so as to lend credence to authenticity. Gay marriages and unions are distinct and stand on their own definitions.

The issue is more of equality of commitment with two different philosophies arguing for dominance.

As with all things human, one only commits out of self interests insofar as cooperation with another is possible. The vices that mankind is plagued with are the very equal nuances that determine outcomes of personal, moral and political principles. They burden all, are cumbersome, and excuse no one; no one escapes the precision which binds the victim to the act.

In any relationship there are variables and like a good equation, rely on structure to eliminate confusion.

Events and time are factors that form and mold any union into a result that is unlike any other. Gays disservice themselves when the assumption is made as to equal terms for unequal philosophy. Despite the best of intentions, persuasions or demands, comparisons to traditional marriage hold no ground. The formula will not work simply because it is a formula that must function as demanded. The structure of any relationship must pattern itself to those variables which are most flexible to achieve success. This requires boldness, openness, risk; manipulating the formula to factor in other methodologies reveals no solutions. Only open ended insertions that confuse the argument.

If only the issue of gay marriage could be reduced to a simple equation. One equals two, two equals one and no ambiguities in between to meddle with. People like formulas, would blend easily into equal portions of individuality defined by their likes and dislikes, their wanton needs with their complexities hidden from view so as to make them all comparable with each other and render them as equal yet different; only if the two could take the chance on the outcome and see courage and bravery welcome them to the door of reason.


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    • A M Werner profile image

      Allen Werner 

      11 years ago from West Allis

      According to Scripture, marriage is only possible between a man and a woman. The actual ceremony of marriage is a religious community creation and although it varies from culture to culture the conclusion of vows and commitment before an unseen Creator remain. The social marriage is one authorized by the State, which is where many people are today. This is why, even for religious people, divorce is a liberal and acceptable solution and conclusion. Gay marriage fits in well with State marriage because it is more of an economical, approved by man decision now, rather than a truly, before the eyes of "God" type of deal. There are not many traditionalist around anymore, and there isn't much thought going in before committing. Many people, even many Christians today, are arrogant to the point of lusting themselves in and out of love. Our culture doesn't comprehend committment in any other arena of life, so the necessity for it to be in marriage also eludes them. As for the gay community itself, State marriage seems only appropriate because the State answers to no higher calling than itself and as readily accepts divorce as it does marriage - as long as the paperwork is signed, the IRS can process it, everyone is happy. Christian religion should up hold the standards set forth in its own Scriptures, its own beliefs. To shred the Word of the Lord and be all-inclusive merely to avoid hurting people's feelings and emotions is a quick pass to perdition. As testified by Yahshua in Matthew 5:17-20, our righteousness must exceed that of the Pharisees, and we do this first by upholding the commandments and teaching them. Peace.

    • profile image


      11 years ago

      George, I know what you believe and stand for, so I'll leave that out and make my observation of this controversial topic. I feel that it doesn't come down to political view. It comes down to religious belief. That being said, you mentioned God once, but factoring God into the equation is not only proper, it is necessity. Lest us not forget the scripture, about a man leaving his mother and father and clinging to his wife. That was written in a time of gay exploits, much like today's age of politically correct homosexual relationship confusion. Please continue to hub, you have a gift for it. Once again, this was well written, like everything else you write, and it is poignant.

    • bihar profile image


      11 years ago from Patna

      nah, to wed is a waste of time.


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