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What Debates?

Updated on February 29, 2016
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Chiquita is at the Table

Good Morning, Breakfastpoppers. Today is Monday, February 29, 2016. Our noisy friend, Chiquita Cicada, is at the breakfast table this morning. Chiquita is worn out. She has been following the "debates" on both sides of the aisle only to discover that they are not debates at all. Shouting fests is a better name for what she has witnessed. Nothing of substance emerges from any of the candidates, and it is time for the circus to leave town. Please join Chiquita for a breakfast of banana nut bread and Irish coffee. Chiquita's vet has advised her to vent her feelings to a group of sympathetic friends. She has chosen all of us to help her release her tensions, so please join us as soon as you can.

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In Center Ring

Thank you all for joining me this morning. The circus is in town, but I'm not having any fun. The "elephants" are parading around the ring making a whole lot of noise but saying absolutely nothing. Their message is clear, however it is said. They are going to make America great again, but please don't ask for the details of this monumental undertaking. Now is not the time for facts and plans. Now is the season of ridiculous insults. Who cares that our economy is still faltering. Americans need not be concerned about unemployment, fleeing companies and thirteen of our biggest retailers closing down stores. We need to focus on Trump's fake tan and Rubio's sweaty face. Never mind that our borders are still porous and our Vets are still suffering. It is far more important to talk about a candidate's big ears or small hands. If this was an actual circus, I might be enjoying myself. This, however, is the real deal. if this pathetic display of idiocy among all the candidates, both Democrats and Republicans, is the best we have to offer, we will never make America great again. Kasich hasn't really sunk to this level, but in this reality show world he just hasn't caught on. Carson can't even get into the circus, so he is begging for insults so that he can say something! The Democrats are a part of the Big Tent, as well. Sanders is trying so hard to make Socialism sound attractive that I am beginning to almost feel sorry for him. He's going down despite how inviting he makes Venezuela look. As for Queen Hillary, all we have to know is that she is now completely in love with Obama and will continue the great job he has been doing for almost two terms! Does anyone have any popcorn?

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I Love a Debate

It would be amazing if these "debates" were actual debates. It would be valuable to see the candidates engage in a real discussion, about real problems while offering real solutions. It would be valuable, but thus far it hasn't happened. If this were a Junior High debate, the kids would be yanked off the stage and sent to the principal's office. Little Donald would be reprimanded for calling Little Marco, Sweaty. Little Marco would be punished for calling Donald Orange. The "voters" in the audience would walk away from the fiasco without a single coherent fact about any of the candidates. In the political arena in the adult world, the candidates act like children and the voters laugh, boo and snort, as one by one those vying for the highest office in the land act like buffoons. The audience is not much better. Does anyone have any popcorn?

Grow Up!

It is time to demand more of those seeking political office. I have had enough of all this childish name-calling. I have had enough of the liars. I have had enough of the slogans and meaningless babble. We have serious problems in this country. Under the failed leadership of Obama we have solved nothing and created many new problems. One word answers and nasty rhetoric doesn't cut it with me. I want a leader, not a politician. I want a serious person with integrity and brains. If you want that too, something is going to have to change. This election process is a joke, a very dangerous joke. Caucuses that were fine years ago when towns had twenty people voting are no longer acceptable. I have no idea what a Super Delegate is, but they have to go away, as well. I want my vote to count. I do not want it swept away by archaic practices that allow someone to win the election, but lose the popular vote. Does anyone have any popcorn?

Chiquita's Song

I'm Chiquita Cicada

And I'm here to say

I wish the politicians

Would just go away......

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