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Five Things the “Powers-that-be” don’t want you to know about Monsanto
“If liberty means anything at all, it means the right to tell people what they don’t want to hear.” –George Orwell
Everyone likes eating food, except maybe cibophobiacs or method actors from the movie Soylent Green. But assuming you have a mouth and an anus, and everything in between functions properly, you probably enjoy the occasional nosh-up. I too am a connoisseur of countless cuisines. I enjoy nothing more than a steaming plate of garlic mashed potatoes, grilled asparagus, and a hot, juicy, mouth-watering slab of… horsemeat!? How in the unholy fuck? What is this, Ikea?
This may seem a mild affront to one’s sensibilities, but it bears mentioning because, as outlandish as it seems, there is a viscous plot afoot behind the scenes of how our company-ran food industries are making the food we all consume. In the past I’ve written about the Military Industrial Complex, Courage, and even Loving Greatly, but for now, how about I go into a wool-pulled-over-your-eyes shredding diatribe about what such malevolent food (poison) corporations as Monsanto don’t want you know.
#1. The Research is not in their favor
Research studies have shown that Monsanto’s GM (genetically modified) foods can lead to serious health conditions: such as the development of cancer tumors, infertility, birth defects, and possibly an arm growing out of your forehead to challenge you to an arm-wrestling match, or at least a thumb war.
Okay maybe not the arm bit, but the rest of these ailments are serious enough that alarm bells should be going off in our heads long before we ever get to the point of crackers made out of humans. -Yes, I referenced Soylent Green again. -No, I won’t stop.
French scientist Gilles-Eric Seralini of the University of Caen recently discovered that lab rats ingesting GM corn, sprayed with Monsanto’s Roundup weed-killer, produced tumors the size of: does-it-matter? And have caused liver and kidney damage on the scale of: Fail! They also found that 70% of the GM corn-fed rats died prematurely. This was a peer-reviewed study that took place over a two-year period. Monsanto supposedly does its own studies: if you can call a non-peer-reviewed, less than 90-day study a “study”. Just recently, May 21st 2013, Monsanto was found guilty of chemical poisoning in a landmark case about a 47-year-old French Farmer.
Granted, we should never put all our eggs into just one basket. Meaning, almost all studies are riddled with bias and contain hidden agendas. But even if these studies are skewed, shouldn’t we at least have the option of consuming natural or organic foods over GM foods? Shouldn’t we, as the consumers who keep these greedy companies afloat, be allowed to decide for ourselves what we want to put into our bodies? Polls have found that 93% of the public wants GM food labeled. I mean, if drugs ever do become legalized and Cracksanto becomes a world-wide drug monopoly, shouldn’t I be informed if the crack I’m about to smoke is 70% more likely to kill me than the already 70% likelihood of dying from smoking regular crack?
Okay, bad example. Here’s an easier question to answer. Why do the FDA and USDA continue to allow cancer-causing chemicals to be used? And why is our food being modified by the world’s largest pesticide manufacturer (Monsanto)? I mean, how can these companies legally get away with this shit?
#2. Corporate/Political Stranglehold
The answer, of course, is that the food industry is now dominated by the actions of U.S. government regulators. Like Henry Kissinger said, “Control the food supply and you control the people.” I guess somebody was listening (*cough* lying, conniving, filthy, half-wit scum of a puke-faced, do-anything-for-money, corporate pig *end-cough*) I mean, what better way to get people to buy your product than to monopolize the world’s food supply, including exclusive patenting rights over seeds and genetic makeup, and then secretly force your product onto shelves without any legal discourse? The only thing preventing this scenario from completely playing out is a well-informed public. It seems the internet, even with all its high school melodrama, is our saving grace. Who knew?
What’s worse is the FDA, the agency tasked with ensuring food safety for the population, is steered by ex-Monsanto executives. Say what?! Can you say “biased”? Can you say “self-fellatio”? Can you say “we’re all screwed because somebody with their head up their ass is telling people who don’t have their head up their ass to pull their head out of their ass”? This is an atrocity. As it stands, the corporations that dominate American food and agricultural interests hold a ridiculous amount of influence over the FDA and USDA. Consumers are offered no real protection from dangerous chemicals intentionally added to their foods. “They like to pretend they are feeding the world, but this is a convoluted lie. Hunger is not a global production problem, it’s a global justice problem,” said International Co-Organizer and MAM Founder Tami Cana.
And now Monsanto has the unmitigated gall to come out and claim that grassroots organizations moving against them are guilty of reverse-elitism? Are you kidding me? Here’s the thing, you Monsanto Kool-Aid drinking douchebags: You’re either for profits, or you’re for people. There really is no way to weasel out of this. Make a decision! If you’re for people over profits, no matter how much it affects your bottom line or how much your “boss” gets paid, you’re cool in most people’s books. But if you’re for profits over people then FUCK YOU! Bottom line! No ifs, ands, or buts about it. The right to know what we are eating supersedes corporate profit. There is no wiggle worm here, you uncompassionate waste of space; you unsympathetic, worm-for-a-backbone fucktard! Those dollar-signs in your eyes are not glints of future prosperity; they’re outdated symbols for parochial perspectives that simply DO NOT work for a healthy sustainable world. Pull your head out of Bill Gates’ ass! His 500,000 shares of Monsanto are the only thing keeping that monster of a corporation afloat anyway.
#3. Environmental Impact
“There are no passengers on Spaceship Earth. We are all crew.” -Marshall McLuhan
You know why they mislabel so many fish products? Because they don’t have the guts to tell you that the fish you like are gone. Yes, 85% of the world’s fisheries are either completely exploited, overexploited or collapsed. This should come as a wake-up call of the highest order. I mean, I’m cool with salmon just looking like salmon, or tuna just looking like tuna. But eel! What the fuck is that shit? Did you just paint a chow’s tongue brown and call it a day? Come on!
And did you know that one in every three bites of food you eat depends on the honey bee? That’s right. Bees pollinate at least 130 different crops in the US alone, including fruits, vegetables and tree nuts. And it has been proven that GM crops sprayed with pesticides are linked to the death of literally millions of bees. A phenomenon called Colony Collapse Disorder (CCD) has led to the disappearance of bee colonies that are needed to pollinate our food. Massive declines in bee populations means the diversity of our food supply is in jeopardy. This should come as a body blow to biodiversity.
And it’s not just the direct impact on the environment that is causing concern. In North Dakota there’s a GM yellow canola weed plant, known scientifically as Brassica napus var oleifera, on the loose in the wild, screwing things up like a retarded monkey in a Facebook chat room. And then there’s the “herbicide treadmill” to contend with. No, this is not a love-handle blasting, get skinny fast dieting routine. It’s a viscous cycle of plants becoming resistant to chemicals which need more advanced chemicals to contain them. Eventually these plants also form a resistance and the cycle continues, over and over. For many ecologists, this is a major concern.
No one wants to acknowledge these tragic occurrences. Instead they just sing the day away with a mind numbing, just-get-through-the-day song, some nails-on-chalkboard tralala of musical dissonance that hits the ear like a pissed-off hornet’s nest. It'll be fast-paced and full of idiot colloquialisms that will sooth you for ever having been someone who is upset about the natural order of things. But you’ll listen to it just to get through the day. Won’t you? That was a rhetorical question.
#4. Monsanto Protection Act
There’s a reason why more than 50 countries around the world have either banned GM foods all together, or are at least labeling them. That reason is freedom of choice. Nobody wants to be force fed anything. The amount of trust we put into our food industry is baffling, but the food industry should at least respect our trust by honestly labeling their food products.
The Monsanto Protection Act, passed in March 2013, essentially allows Monsanto to sell GM products without federal permission, thus dodging any judicial consequences. It strips federal courts of the power to halt the illegal planting of potentially hazardous crops. This is an outrage. If Monsanto and Dupont need a bill passed that protect them from legal action, then surely they know what they’re doing is illegal. It’s not so much that these companies are making scary food that is potentially harmful; it’s that, with acts such as these, our basic human right to choose what we want to eat is being violated.
Short of saying “your mom’s ass tastes like Caesar salad” there are very few phrases you will find that will offend you as much as “shut up and eat what we tell you to eat”. Um, no! Not an option. Anybody thinking they have the authority to decide what I can or cannot eat can go jump off a bridge. Here, I’ll give you a boost.
#5. How Polyculture Systems are more sustainable than Monoculture Systems
Monoculture is the agricultural method of growing a single crop in the same area over many years. Polyculture is the method of growing multiple crops in the same area but in accordance with nature and balanced with the needs of the immediate environment. Both have NOTHING on the independent farmer transforming his/her yard into a garden. I commend anyone who, instead of planting a rosebush or a showy tree (that does nothing but disguise a culture that has lost touch with nature by displaying it superficially), plants a garden. And I commend even further a community of urban farmers who get together and share their food.
But back to our battle royale of mass agricultural systems. Monoculture is about industry. Polyculture is about diversity. Monoculture suffers from a lack of biodiversity and nutrients in soil. Polycuture thrives with biodiversity and replenished soil. Monoculture requires pesticides. Polyculture is a function of biological pest control. Monoculture is unnatural. Polyculture is natural. Monoculture leads to disease and famine. Polyculture leads to abundance and permaculture. Monoculture is about money over people. Polyculture is about people (and environment) over money.
This isn’t about the wealth of an industry or the robustness of our nation’s ability to trade. This is about ecosystems and abundance over ego systems and greed. This is about people who need to eat healthy foods in order to live long healthy lives. When we farm alongside nature, in balance with nature, we discover more biodiversity which helps the progress of both humans and nature.
No matter what kind of impact the March Against Monsanto (May 25th 2013) has on the future of GM foods, the point is clear: We the People demand to know what we are putting into our bodies. No industry should have the power to dictate what we eat. I don’t care if you’re the president of the United States or the queen of England, you can both find that bridge I mentioned earlier if you think you can get away with allowing this farce of a judicial system to continue acting the way it has. Pull your head out of each the others asses. Wake up and smell the genetically modified flowers!
-Some guy on the internet running through the streets screaming, “It’s people! Soylent Green is people!!”