Dumped? 10 reasons to party
Your girlfriend or boyfriend has packed her or his bags and left you behind, alone in an empty house, or threw you out without an explanation. One day you smiled at the future and the next moment it seems you’re feeling the deep dark. Will you ever overcome this loss?
Is there a remedy for the sorrow of love? Throwing yourself into the party life? Take time to cope and think about what you have lost, but maybe also what you’ve won? Whatever you try, the first weeks you’ll have to survive one way or the other.
Since I’ve recently been going through this process of grieve and sorrow… let me help.
Stop that self pity for a minute and look at the situation from a different point of view. Like in the life of Brian...”Look at the bright side of life...” or in this case, look at the bright side of being dumped. There are at least ten reasons why you should be happy that the B**** or that Ass**** dumped you.
YOU’RE FREE AGAIN!!! And that just means…
1) You can go wherever you want and go home whenever you want…
In his case
You’re as free as a bird, can go out all night, end up in bed in dirty clothes and wake up with your neighbors banging at your door because you parked your car in their front yard when you came home.
In her case:
You can talk with anyone you want to, without him looking over your shoulder with a jealous face and without him starting to fight with the guy at whom you’ve just ordered a beer because he’s simply the guy behind the bar and you can go out with your friends without him trying to hit on one of them.
2) The TV is yours….
In his case:
From now on, you’ll be able to watch all your favorite sports and DVD’s. Also the DVD’s with the lady’s who hardly have any clothes on, or even better, without any clothes on.
In her case:
Finally.. You can watch that movie that makes you cry, that love story that ends up in drama without him making jokes or talking about the football match on the other channel.
3) The Bathroom is yours!
In his case:
You’ll never have to ask over and over again where your razorblades are.
“In my beautycase honey... I’ve just used them on ..Uhmmm.. You know what I mean”
In her case:
Now more empty shampoo bottles, no more mess after he’s taking a shower and doesn’t bother to clean up after shaving himself.
4) No more obligatory visits
In his case:
Sunday afternoon is all yours now. No more visits to her mother and father and no more visits to her friends. You can spend this day as you want it now and visit whom you want to and enjoy it in maximum freedom. A big step ahead!
In her case:
No more long afternoons overhearing the stories from his friends when they are having their seventh beer at one o’clock in the afternoon. No more driving him home after you’ve asked him six hours before. No more “mother- in – law” who’s telling you how to take care of her “baby” when you visit them after church because she’s making his favorite soup on Sundays.
5) The toilet seat.
In his case:
Never hearing “How many times did I ask you to put the toilet seat down?” again
In her case:
Great, no more dirty toilet seats which he didn’t want to put down.
6) Flowers and plants
In his case:
From now on you’re the only living thing that needs water.
In her case:
Your plants will survive now. No more man that waters your plants himself instead of going to the bathroom when he’s drunk after going out with his friends.
7) Closet space
In his case:
All the shelves that your girlfriend had claimed for her clothes are yours again. Now you can put those three T- shirts and the five pieces of underwear where you want them
In her case:
Finally all the shelves to yourself. His old clothes, those three t- shirts and 5 pieces of underwear and the 39 pairs of white socks he forgot to mention are gone now.
8) House rules.
In his case:
You can leave your mess where you want it to leave, can use the couch as a multifunctional piece of furniture (a bed, a dinner table, to archive you DVD’s and Playboy’s.. a storing space for all other kinds of often used things. You’re the boss now.
In her case:
You don’t have to pick up his clothes after him anymore after you’ve asked him many many times when he is taking a shower, don’t nee4d to ask why the house is still a mess when you get home from work, don’t need to explain anything.
9) No more discussions about where to go on holidays
In his case:
Why should you go on a holiday when you have such a multifunctional couch and that way, have everything you need?
In her case:
Finally you can go on a vacation that goes further than the living room or the local pub around the corner because he wants to stay close to his friends.
10) No more sex if you don’t want to
In his case:
From now on you’ll be the one that decides when, where and how long (ROFL)
In her case:
Now more faking when he wants his 2 minutes of fame. A vibrator does a better job than the few caresses which he thinks is great sex. From now on you can do it the way you want it.
ENJOY YOUR LIFE !
