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10 Signs He's Into You: What's His Body Language Saying?

Updated on July 8, 2019
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Adrienna has studied body language for years and finds the study fascinating and surprisingly accurate!

If a guy is falling for you and is not directly expressing it, those hidden feelings are going to come out in other ways. We aren't always fortunate enough to receive direct and clear verbal communication when it comes to what a man is feeling. Therefore, a guy's subconscious body language will spill out from the sides revealing his true interest. Here are 10 body language signs he’s into you...

BOYISH BEHAVIOR

If he’s a regular mature guy in everyday life, but becomes boyish when you're around, this could be because he's got a little crush. Does he start acting like a playful 7 year old? Does he suddenly become silly or clumsy when you walk in the room? Or perhaps he embarrasses or blushes easily in your presence? These are signs that this guy is around a girl he likes!

MIRRORING

Mirroring your body language shows his interest. For example, if you are leaning on a bar or wall, he also leans on the bar or wall. If you start playing with your drink, he starts playing with his drink. Using your words is also a way of mirroring you. For instance, if “Holy cow dude!” is an expression you use often, and find it’s not long before he’s using the same expression, it’s a way he’s trying to sync with you on a subconscious level.

BOUNDARY DISSOLVEMENT

If he crosses over from things he likes into doing things you like, this is an act of trying to merge with you. He’s sending the message, I want to come into your lane! Examples could be that he begins to read books you like or he signs up for a dance class you’re in that he would’ve never signed up for otherwise. More fun examples are that he suddenly shows up in your yoga class, he’s watching a romantic comedy with you instead of the big game at his friend’s house, he downloads your favorite album to give it a listen, or he signs up to volunteer at the same charity event you are volunteering at. This is him saying, I like you!

DELICATE TOUCH

Is he getting ’in-touch’ with the woman he wants? A guys guy isn’t really known for having a delicate touch, that is unless he’s touching the girl he likes! Men see their girl of interest as a princess. If you’re the chosen princess, you may find his fingertips delicately touching or caressing your arm or hand. And if he touches your hair deliberately in this same delicate manner, you can be pretty confident he’s diggin’ you! A light touch is a way he gets to experience you as well as express desire for you.

STRONG TOUCH

On the flip side of a delicate touch, there’s strong touch which also indicates he’s into you. A man’s subconscious likes to display ‘possession’ of things that are his. Using strong touch is a way of showing he’s laying claim. For example, a guy who puts his arm around a girl and keeps it there, just like the classic movie theater move, is saying - I want this girl to be mine. Or are you walking in the park or down the street and he’s got his arm around you? This is showing ownership of you as a girlfriend.

MICRO EXPRESSIONS

Micro expressions are quick flashes of emotion across our face that we humans can’t control. Micro expressions can reflect surprise, anger, contempt, impatience, etc. For instance, if someone you don’t like walks in the room, for a flash second a micro expression of contempt may twitch on your face before you’re able to turn the other way. When a guy shows he has interest in you with a micro expression, it may be seen as things like his eyebrows raise up, there's a quick glimmer in his eye, he flashes a toothy grin, takes in a quick breath, his lips part for a moment, he flushes, or you catch him staring. It’s a very short window so you have to be watching for it! These are facial signals he’s into you.

ROSEY LENSES

If you have quirky attributes that tend to annoy or put off others, but he likes them, this is a sign of acceptance and adoration. Examples of this could be how your hair always sticks up in a certain spot, but he finds it cute. Perhaps those blazing bright green pants you love to wear, that hurt the eyes of your friends, are thought of as cool and stylish by the guy who likes you. This is him being in awe of your uniqueness and accepting who you are. These “cute” faults or quirks of yours are being seen through rose colored lenses.

DEPTH OF AWARENESS

How about that guy who opens the door for himself as he cuts in front of you to enter first? Yeah, we know that guy. That guy has lack of awareness to everyone but himself and puts his own considerations first. That’s the guy who DOESN’T like you enough to notice. Having awareness and consideration takes a depth of emotion that isn’t available for just anyone and everyone. If he takes notice of detailed things about you, such as the shoes you're wearing, your likes and dislikes, your favorite color or a food, this is him giving you a special awareness. He’s choosing to listen to the things you say closely, up-ticking his presence.

PROVIDER & PROTECTOR

Falling into the role of provider or protector is a primitive action for men. They’ve got a switch deep in their brain that makes this role come naturally toward the woman he has romantic interest for. If he's looking out for you, such as holding you back before you cross the street, offering you his jacket, wanting to go some place with you in case you need assistance, this is him wanting to provide safety and care for you. There is a certain stake he’s invested in your well being so he acts out in ways that orient himself to make sure you are protected.

TAKING ACTION

The movie, “He’s Just Not That Into You” said it perfectly, “If a guy is into you, he will make it happen.” He will take action such as ask you out, B-line across the room to talk to you, or dig through a pile of trash to find that little piece of paper you gave him with your number on it. If plans fall through such as meeting for drinks, he’s the one to call you and reschedule, not the other way around. These are simple gestures that are direct when he wants to hang with you. If he's not making it happen, it could just be it's because he doesn't want it to happen. In that case ladies, let go the bruised ego and let him go on his way. Don't waste your emotional availability on a fish that doesn't want to be caught. Instead, keep your head and heart free to the guy who is worth something, the one who sees you as a gem he can't let go!

WHAT TO WATCH OUT FOR

A player is a man who has learned these signs and uses them manipulatively to get something from you. The signs are well done on his part, but they aren’t sincere… there’s an agenda he’s not sharing with you. Of course not all men are players, there’s a lot of good ones out there! But don’t throw caution to the wind because he’s signaling the signs above. Allow the test of time to prove if these body language signals are authentic or based on an ulterior motive. Take a look around, is he giving other ladies in the office the same signs? Is he moving from one gal to the next at the club? No need to interrogate, but if you’re hanging out take note of his attitude toward women and sex. What’s his reputation? Also, listen to your intuition. If you're getting red flags on the inside, even if none show on the outside, pay attention! A woman's intuition is usually spot on which will help you from being played the player. On the sunny side of things, if you’ve got a genuine guy, authentically interested in you, may the the cupid be good to you both!

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    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 

      8 months ago from Chicago

      Very interesting.

      "A player is a man who has learned these signs and uses them manipulatively to get something from you. The signs are well done on his part, but they aren’t sincere… there’s an agenda he’s not sharing with you." - This is absolutely true!

      Anyone who has ever taken a sales training course, learned about establishing rapport, or read "How to Win Friends and Influence People" will have learned how to use many of these techniques to get others to like and trust them.

      Is being aware of how the mind works manipulative?

      Is having a goal and going after what you want bad?

      The whole "How to" and "Self-help" industry is geared towards teaching people how to get what they want without coming right out and asking for it. There's the "engagement chicken dinner recipe", pheromones, affirmations/visualization exercises, spells/chanting, articles and books that offer to teach you how to find love, a boyfriend/girlfriend, win your ex back, impress someone, get them to propose, or whatever other "call to action" you have in mind.

      Essentially most people want the other person to be (unaware) of the efforts they are making to get them to do as they want. For example instead of asking someone for a commitment they will buy a book titled: How to Get Your Partner to Commit.

      As a society we have fallen in love with {subliminal tactics} and Jedi-mind tricks rather than running the risk of being rejected by being direct.

      Lastly we need to stop viewing sex and sexual attraction as something negative. Men have to pretend like sex is the last thing on their mind which is a game women insist men play.

      The truth of the matter is if a man asks you out on a date, invests time, and money it is because he thought you were attractive! At some point he hopes to have sex with you.

      There is a reason why he asked YOU out instead of the one eyed woman with the crater skin, bowlegs, missing front teeth, and wire hair! He was physically/sexually attracted to you!

      The mistake a lot of men make is believing women say "yes" to dates because they too are physically/sexually attracted to the men. However the truth of the matter is some women will go out on dates with men they have absolutely no romantic interest in!

      The event, activity, or restaurant is something they enjoy. They had no other plans for the weekend, or they didn't want to hurt the guy's feelings. If at the end of the date he attempts to kiss her she acts offended and feels confused. He thought she was "into him" because she said yes to going out with him. Yes to the date isn't yes to the man!

      It would be refreshing if a woman said: "Sure we can go out but I want you to know you are NOT my type. I have zero romantic interest in you and if you were the last man on earth I would NEVER have sex with you! However if you still want to go out you can pick me up at 7PM."

      Odds are not many women would be openly honest with men. The irony is even if they were the men would be too cowardly to withdraw the date proposal in many instances. After all they too are playing the game of not being sexually attracted and only wanting to have fun.

      Any woman who believes a man has money burning a hole in his pocket and he's just dying to spend money and time with (any woman) who crosses his path for the sake of female companionship has her head buried in the sand. He is (physically attracted) to YOU!

      All your other attributes, education level, and career accomplishments are (icing) on the cake. The impetus for asking you out was because he found you to be sexually appealing. Upon spending more time together all of the other things come into play which will decide if a casual relationship evolves into something serious.

      One man's opinion! :)

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