5 Best Ways to Move On
Breaking up with someone you thought you'd spend the rest of your life with is never easy. It's like you're losing a close friend and the chances of you getting back together can sometimes be close to none. There are many reasons why a relationship can never work out such as you want different things, constantly disagreeing on things, one of you is not into it as much, or that it was rushed. Whatever the reason may be, the common theme in breaking up is that you and your partner are just not right for each other.
While is may be hard to get over your ex, it is important to remember to maintain yourself. I have witnessed many people who have adapted to unhealthy outlets when it comes to getting over their ex such as binge eating, having meaningless sex with people they've known for only two days, or drinking the pain away. All of these outlets have potentially serious consequences associated with them and can cause someone to feel even worse about themselves. In order to avoid being caught up in these unhealthy outlets, here are some ways to be able to cope with the pain of breaking up and moving on from the past.
Healthy Ways of Moving On
There are many ways to move on from a relationship in healthy ways. Many people take up exercise, vent their frustrations on paper, or just let their emotions out. From witnessing and being a part of many breakups, I have found that these five methods of moving on are the best ones by far. If you choose to do one or all of them, these are the ways that help you move on from your past relationship and live in the present.
Crying- Emotions are what makes us human. It is a way for us to interact with others and to help others understand how we are feeling when we interact with them. Keeping your emotions bottled up, however, is never a good way to move on from your ex. Keeping the tears inside usually causes us to take longer to move on. It's okay to cry because the more you cry immediately and just to let it all out, the easier it will be for you to be able to move one once you just let the sadness all out of your system.
Spending time with your friends- The best thing about friendship is that its not a relationship. Your friends are guaranteed to last longer than any romantic relationship you have with anyone because you don't expect anything of them in a romantic sense. Being with your friends is a great way to help you move on because they will be there to listen to you vent about the break up and offer you a shoulder to cry on. Aside from being someone to talk to, your friends are also the best resource to help you rebuild your confidence again. They are the ones who are going to drag you out of your sad place, get you all dolled up, and take you out to have the night of your life. Your ex may have brought you down, but your friends will build you back up.
Exercising- Being angry is one thing, taking it out on something or someone who doesn't deserve it is another thing. Anger is normal when it comes to breaking up but it also can come with drastic consequences when anger is taken out during the wrong place at the wrong time. I have found that the best way to deal with anger is through exercise. Exercise is the best way to let out all that anger in that you have building up inside of you. One common exercise that people do to release the anger is boxing. Boxing does not require you to have any kind of physical strength, all you need is some gloves and a punching bag and a lot of anger to burn off. Other great exercises that let off steam is running laps, pull-ups, push-ups, and lifting weights. It is guaranteed that if you do one or more of these exercises, you'll find that your rage will be gone completely.
Venting/Talking About It- Keeping emotions on the inside is not a good way to deal with a break up. Keeping those emotions inside is shaking a two liter bottle of Coca Cola, it will eventually will bubble up enough on the inside and then explode with full force, much like your impending explosion if you do not let these emotions out soon. One way to let these emotions out of your system is through venting. Venting is a way for you to just say whatever is on your mind without any kind of judgement and it is also a healthy way for you to keep your thoughts in a safe environment without saying it to the wrong crowd. Venting can take place in most forms such as writing it down on a piece of paper, talking to a friend, or even just talking to yourself in a mirror. Just remember after you vent, you'll feel weight being lifted off of your chest and you'll be able to let go of the negative emotions faster and more effective.
Accepting Your New Single Life- The five stages of grief include denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. Acceptance comes in last because it signifies that you are ready to accept the circumstances you cannot change and move on from it. This also applies to breaking up. Accepting your new life as a single person is probably the best way for you to finally move on from your ex and to it also helps you to put yourself back out there. Acceptance leads you to understand that your break up is not the end of your story, rather it is the end of a chapter in that story that allows a new chapter to begin. By accepting the outcomes of a breakup, you'll be able to move on faster and easier.
Breaking up is the cruel part of dating, but it is a blessing in disguise. Breaking up with your significant other just simply means that you were right not right for each other and you'll be able to move on from it a lot faster if you use one or more of these coping mechanisms.
"After breaking up with my girlfriend after five years, I found comfort in being in peaceful places such as the beach, walking my dog in the park, and going to the gym. After a few months, I was able to finally accept the fact that we are no longer together and that I can put myself back out there again."
© 2020 Santiago Salinas