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4 Signs that He's Just not that Into you

Updated on September 7, 2016

1. He doesn't communicate his feelings.

Many women just assume that all men are emotionless beings that are incapable of communicating how they feel. And while, in general, men are definitely not as communicative of their feelings as women, perhaps the women who say this just haven't met a man that is truly into them. When a man truly, TRULY has feelings for a lady, he won't shy away from telling her how fantastic she is and how much she means to him. Why? Because in this moment he believes you are the best thing that ever happened to him and he is terrified of losing you. Now, men also sometimes are blind to the fact that you need compliments like this, and so these professions of love may only come at a point in time where there is a real threat of him losing you. I'm not encouraging any of you ladies out there to "test" a man by pulling away from him, but if he shows no effort to reach out to you at a low point in the relationship, he most likely doesn't value you as much as he should.

Another common thing men tend to say is something along the lines of, "I'm just not sure how I feel" or, "I'd like to just see how things go". This is often a man's answer to you asking him how he really feels, and when you look at it, it isn't really an answer at all. He's just dodging the question. Nine times out of ten, he knows exactly how he feels. He just knows that it isn't what he "should" say, so he's buying more time with you, perhaps just for the physical aspect of the relationship.

2. He doesn't make time for you

This one might seem blindingly obvious, but believe it or not, many women fail to see this as a sign that a man might not be interested. He might make some pretty good excuses as to why you haven't seen him in a couple weeks, but the bottom line is that if he really saw you as "keeper potential" he would try to make time just for you. In today's world, with all of the different means of communication, it would be as simple as writing out a few words and sending a quick message to remain in touch with you if he truly is too busy to make any time to see you. With as connected as we are today, it really is saying something if he chooses to not have any communication whatsoever. Again, if a guy really likes you, he is going to want to talk to you just like you want to talk to guys that you're interested in.

3. You haven't met his friends or family

If the man you're seeing has no interest in introducing you to his friends or family, it may be a warning sign that he doesn't see a future with you. Obviously, it takes some time for a relationship to develop enough for one to introduce their significant other as a part of their life, so don't go cry in the rain because you haven't met his mother, grandmother, and favorite aunt after three dinner dates. There's no set rule for the amount of time it should take, because every situation is different. It seems logical that you meet his friends before family because you'll likely be doing things with and getting to know the people that spend the most time in his life first. Some guys may say something along the lines of "I'd like to keep our relationship separate from my friendships", but trust me on this: if a man is proud and happy to have you in his life and wants you to be a part of his life, you'll know his friends and eventually his family. If this just isn't happening, you may want to consider if he sees you as "girlfriend material" or just a casual hookup.

4. He talks about other women

Another sign of a lack of commitment is if he talks about other women, or specifically another woman. This one goes hand in had with a lack of communication. He might say he has trouble communicating his feelings, but has no problem opening up about how he felt about that one amazing girl from his past. Of course, he's "totally over her now". This is truly a situation in which some guys just can't help themselves. They know they shouldn't mention girls from their past, but they have a strong desire to talk about a woman that they haven't quite gotten over yet as part of the closure process. Unfortunately, many women mistake this for complete honesty and openness when really it is a sign that he's not over her and definitely not into you.


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    • Abraham Carson profile imageAUTHOR

      Abraham Carson 

      2 years ago from America

      I would have to agree with all of those!

    • dashingscorpio profile image


      2 years ago

      I would also add:

      5. He shows no interest in what is going on in (your) life.

      If someone doesn't ask you about how your day went or what your plans are it's because they don't care!

      6. You are always the one to initiate contact or suggest getting together.

      7. He makes no effort to "impress you" with romantic gestures.

      8. He uses the term "hang out" when he does invite you someplace.

      9. He never spends the night with you or leaves early if he does.

      10. There are no future plans discussed including upcoming holidays...etc

      One man's opinion! :)


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