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5 Steps To Get You Ex Back

Updated on May 8, 2011


Sad after breakup...
Sad after breakup...

Do You Want Your Ex Back? Have you changed enough to warrant a second chance?

Everyone is looking for someone they can spend the rest of their life with. When you find this person, you are happier than ever before, and feel that you can do anything.

Sadly, break ups are possible (a fact of life), and they can happen to anyone, any time, for any reason.

Some break ups are necessary, while others can be undone.

Do you want an ex back, because you realize that you cannot or will not live without them?

Here are some tips for getting your ex back!

1 - First and foremost, you need to have a clear head if you want your ex back.

People can always tell if you have too much going on in your mind, and if you have a lot on your mind regarding the break up, your ex will know.

You need to stop thinking about how badly you want him or her back, stop stressing about the future of your relationship, and simply clear your head. It will improve your communication with your ex, which will improve the chances of getting back with your ex.

2 - If you want your ex back, you need to understand the reasons why the break-up happened but also that you can change, for the good, to win him/her back.

I know you want to do everything humanly possible to get your ex back, but begging and apologizing because you want him or her back so badly is not the way to go.

Take a couple of days to write down the great points of your relationship, and the tough points.

Somewhere in those jumbled notes will be the clues to what you need to change about yourself to get him/her back.

During this time you need to be strong, be calm , and focus on doing fine without him or her, to improve the possibility of getting back together in a couple of weeks, months.

3 - To get your ex back, create a self-made wow factor.

If you can't make personal change happen, how will you seem different, that you were before the breakup. Show off your changes! The same old you is not going to be able to get back with your ex.

The old you contributed to the end of the relationship, so it is time to create a wow factor. Do a little bit to change your life each day, maybe working out more, or getting a better job or taking night classes to improve your lot in life. Do what is necessary to create a better image of who you are, and you ex will surely notice and respond well to your new self with these positive changes.

4 - To get your ex back, do not forget why the breakup happened.

Do not be haunted by what was said at the time of the breakup, but you should not forget about what led to the break up either.

Take what happened in the past and make them into a relationship learning experience. By working hard to understand the mistakes that were made in the past you should be able to avoid making the same mistakes in the future. If he/she finds the change in you satisfying then maybe you can get back together with your ex sometime in the future.

5 - Create a plan, finally!

You cannot just emotionally go all out, hoping for good results. Put a straightforward plan together instead, thinking logically and operating accordingly.

If you put real thought into the healing and personal change process you will be a lot more successful at winning your ex back.

Plan for success and you will be able to get your ex back in no time at all.

Don't take any chances, don't make any mistakes that will drive them away forever.


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    • R Pseudomen profile imageAUTHOR

      Robert Lee 

      7 years ago from Canada

      Hi JenniferBlueEyes2, It really depends on the person or people involved. If they are not respectful or responsible to you, or you to them, they will certainly wander.

      Every situation is different and difficult, and in a breakup it can be beneficial to give the other person time to think things through and to miss you, but this isn't always the case.

      Best wishes,


    • JenniferBlueEyes profile image


      7 years ago

      Hi R. I have a question. Does absence really make the heart grow fonder, or does it just give the other person a chance to think of making plans to move forwards? I've read a lot of your advice and I'm trying to use them in my predicament but I am just not sure.


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