7 Ways to Know If You Are Ready for Marriage

The Bible provides guidance and wisdom on many aspects of life, including marriage. The decision to enter into the covenant of marriage is a significant one, and it is important to discern if you are truly ready. The Bible teaches that marriage is a sacred union ordained by God, and it requires careful consideration and preparation.

Firstly, in order to know if you are ready for marriage, it is essential to seek wisdom from God through prayer and reflection. Proverbs 3:5-6 teaches us to trust in the Lord with all our hearts and lean not on our own understanding, but to acknowledge Him in all our ways. This means seeking His guidance and discernment in the decision to marry. It is crucial to take the time to pray, reflect on your motives, and seek God's will for your life and relationships. This will help you align your desires and intentions with God's plan for marriage.

Secondly, readiness for marriage requires a strong foundation of personal maturity and spiritual growth. Ephesians 5:25-28 instructs husbands to love their wives as Christ loved the church, and wives to submit to their husbands as to the Lord. This entails sacrificial love, selflessness, and humility. Therefore, it is important to evaluate your own character, emotional maturity, and spiritual walk before considering marriage. Are you prepared to love and honor your partner unconditionally, putting their needs before your own? Are you able to communicate effectively, resolve conflicts in a healthy manner, and make decisions together as a team? These are important qualities to possess before entering into the covenant of marriage.

Lastly, being ready for marriage means understanding and embracing the biblical principles of commitment and covenant. Marriage is not just a legal contract or a casual relationship, but a lifelong commitment to love, honor, and cherish one another. Mark 10:7-9 states that a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh. This emphasizes the importance of leaving behind old relationships and forming a new covenant with your spouse. Are you ready to prioritize and invest in your marriage, even when challenges arise? Are you committed to building a strong foundation based on mutual respect, trust, and faithfulness? These are crucial considerations in discerning if you are truly prepared for the lifelong commitment of marriage according to biblical principles.

In conclusion, the decision to marry should not be taken lightly, and it is essential to seek guidance from God, evaluate personal maturity and spiritual growth, and understand the biblical principles of commitment and covenant. By aligning our hearts and minds with God's wisdom and plan, we can discern if we are truly ready for the sacred covenant of marriage, and embark on a journey of love, selflessness, and lifelong commitment with our chosen partner.

Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother and cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh (Genesis 2:24)

A person who is selfish may only consider what is in their best interest. Choices, actions taken, and the motives for those choices and actions all benefit the selfish individual. Marriage transitions a person from independence to a life of sharing and togetherness. Decisions should now be made with both parties instead of just one. One flesh means now the married couple become one in everything that they do. For a person who is not ready to give up their independence, marriage plans may need to be put on hold.

Marriage should not be something a person tries out and if it doesn't work , move on to the next. Many enter into marriage with a failure mentality and when problems come, a spouse may be more apt to leave than work things out. With the divorce rate being over 50% in both Christian and non-Christian circles, to remain committed for life seems foreign in today's society, but for every breakup there is a true commitment. With a lifetime commitment one must guard against boredom and keep boundaries in place to keep others from invading private area's designed for the marriage couple themselves. Lifetime commitment is forsaking all others and loving one's spouse for who they are and not for what they can do.

Misplaced priorities concerning family and friends have been the downfall of many marriages. When other outside voices and opinions control a relationship, the husband may not feel respected and the wife may not feel appreciated. This may cause each other to shut down and simply go through the motions of marriage which is to go to work, come home, and watch television, go to bed and maybe have physical contact ...which is not real love making by the way.

Can two walk together except they be agreed? (Amos 3:3)

There is no mystery in the fact that men and women are different, but what many do not recognize is that those differences are necessary for the other to see another point of view. Destination is the key and if both individuals are not ending up at the same destination, there will be problems. Practically speaking there is more than one way to end up at the same place; for example during traveling on the highway to a vacation destination, more than one route can be taken that will lead to the same destination. Getting on the same page means to for example find out each others point of view on Religion and what religion the family will be a part of, discipline and how will the children be disciplined when they come, if there will in fact be any children, will both parties be employed, etc. To enter into marriage without the discussion of these very important issues may lead to problems down the road.

People marry for many reasons such as for money, good looks, unexpected pregnancy, to move away from parents, feeling they are getting too old, just to name a few. If the real reason is not centered around loving the person for who they really are, the other motives may shake the very foundation of the relationship. Loving a person unconditionally and not for what that person can do is a God centered love. This kind of love when faced with a tragic situation such as an accident leaving a person in a wheelchair when you walked down the isle on your wedding day with that person or taking care of someone who can no longer care for themselves, because life happens! This is the real meaning of in sickness and in health. Loving a person for who they are should be a main motive for marriage.

Marriage will take lots of work from two willing individuals. The princess riding into the sunset with her knight in shining armor may not happen without real expectations of the work that lay ahead. Enduring hardness means to be consistently the same in the midst of those hard times. Many couples divorce because they feel as though the person they are with is not the same person they married. The truth is people do change because the physical appearance will not be the same at 50 as it was at 26, feelings change but one cannot be lead by feelings but by faith. Belief in what a marriage can be is more powerful than how one feels about it. A persons values that are biblical should never change because God's word is final authority and the bible is all about marriage preservation and not destruction. Fantasy is not real and false expectation concerning marriage can bring disappointment in the long run.

Wholeness deals with the spirit (real you), soul(mind will and emotions) and body of a person. Another word for wholeness is to be complete. Many marry because they are looking for someone to complete them when in reality one should enter into marriage as whole individuals. Decide to enter the relationship to bring something to it and not to only get something out of it.

10 general tips based on biblical principles that you may find helpful in determining if you are ready for marriage:

1. Seeking God's Guidance: Pray and seek God's guidance in your decision to get married. Trust in His wisdom and direction.

2. Emotional Maturity: Ensure that you are emotionally mature and capable of handling the responsibilities and challenges that come with marriage, such as communication, conflict resolution, and selflessness.

3. Spiritual Alignment: Make sure that you and your potential spouse share similar spiritual beliefs and values, as this will provide a solid foundation for your relationship.

4. Selflessness: Be willing to put the needs and interests of your partner above your own, as marriage requires selflessness and sacrificial love.

5. Financial Stewardship: Be financially responsible and capable of managing your finances in a wise and responsible manner, as financial issues can be a significant source of stress in a marriage.

6. Commitment: Understand that marriage is a lifelong commitment and be willing to work through challenges and difficulties together, rather than giving up easily.

7. Communication Skills: Develop good communication skills, including active listening, expressing yourself clearly and respectfully, and resolving conflicts in a healthy and constructive manner.

8. Support System: Have a strong support system of family, friends, and mentors who can provide guidance, accountability, and support in your relationship and marriage.

9. Emotional and Physical Purity: Maintain emotional and physical purity, following biblical principles of sexual purity and fidelity, and understand the importance of faithfulness and loyalty in marriage.

10. Preparedness for Roles and Responsibilities: Understand and be prepared for the roles and responsibilities that come with marriage, including being a loving spouse, a responsible parent (if applicable), and a supportive partner in all aspects of life.

Remember, every individual and relationship is unique, and seeking personalized guidance from trusted mentors, pastors, or counselors can be beneficial as you discern your readiness for marriage based on your specific circumstances and beliefs.

1. Seek the interests of others before your own - Philippians 2:3-4 (NKJV): "Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interests but also for the interests of others."

2. Practice generosity and giving to those in need - Luke 6:38 (NKJV): "Give, and it will be given to you: good measure, pressed down, shaken together, and running over will be put into your bosom. For with the same measure that you use, it will be measured back to you."

3. Show kindness and compassion towards others - Ephesians 4:32 (NKJV): "And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you."

4. Share your blessings with others and avoid hoarding - 1 Timothy 6:17-18 (NKJV): "Command those who are rich in this present age not to be haughty, nor to trust in uncertain riches but in the living God, who gives us richly all things to enjoy. Let them do good, that they are rich in good works, ready to give, willing to share."

5. Put others' needs above your own desires - Mark 12:30-31 (NKJV): "And you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind, and with all your strength.' This is the first commandment. And the second, like it, is this: 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.' There is no other commandment greater than these."

6. Practice humility and avoid self-promotion - Proverbs 27:2 (NKJV): "Let another man praise you, and not your own mouth; a stranger, and not your own lips."

7. Walk in the spirit of self-control and avoid indulging in selfish desires - Galatians 5:16 (NKJV): "I say then: Walk in the Spirit, and you shall not fulfill the lust of the flesh." Galatians 5:22-23 (NKJV) also lists self-control as one of the fruits of the Spirit, which should be cultivated in the lives of believers.

Remember, as a Christian, the focus is on loving and serving others, rather than being self-centered and selfish. These biblical principles can guide you towards a more selfless and Christ-like attitude in your personal life.