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A Great Marriage!

Updated on March 16, 2018

Working together to Build a Great Marriage

A Great Marriage!

Is it still possible?

Divorce is raging a serious battle within our homes and congregations. When a couple has been called to ministry I believe we have an obligation to uphold the marriage vows we speak, teach or preach about. I am thankful that we have been able to uphold our commitment to one another all these years. But I realize it is not because of us it is because of the Lord! Marriage God’s way does work. The Christian Marriage must include God's standards. I give Him full credit for keeping it uppermost in our minds the necessity of living out those vows we made. A great marriage helps you to strengthen your love, trust, intimacy, transparency and so much more. The path you walk is only as strong to the degree, you live out the very principles you talk about .

We still after over forty years of marriage continue to refine our relationship. We have five (5) grown children four (4) who are married, as well as twenty-one (21) grandchildren! All who are very different. (this in itself amazes me at times) I say this because this is not just words for kudos. Nor is this an idealistic, impractical approach to marriage designed to lead anyone into a fairytale concept of marriage. I realize firsthand that there is very serious spiritual warfare that continuously attempts to come against marriages. Therefore I want to encourage others to uphold God’s Design for The Christian Marriage. I am “Pro Marriage” God's Way!

With GOD in your life there is always HOPE for marriage!

This 21st century has ushered in some strange and disturbing things in regards to marriage. Marriage is the first institution that was designed by God. His way was designed to last a lifetime. A great Christian marriage consists of one man and one woman united in Holy Matrimony. There is a special bond that takes place during this committed union. According to the Word of God “The two become one flesh.” Yet also become two whole individuals united in the Lord!

A great marriage consists of a relationship where mutual respect and love coexist. Intimacy in marriage is a crucial part of the relationship as well. Here is where you learn to become transparent. It is also quite important that together you must build trust in your relationship. You must continue to seek the Lord and apply His Word within your marriage. When difficult or painful situations arise, and they will, together you must sincerely attempt to come to a resolution employing His principles. Don’t go into denial. Confront the issue in love. Get creative and really commit to working together!

You must make a sincere attempt to take time to build a mutual, enjoyable, satisfying, environment together that will help you weather the storms of life. You must continually learn to nurture your relationship and ENJOY one another! If you have not begun to do so it is never too late to start. It is important to be affectionate. To hold hands, touch, kiss, hug, hold or gently caress and affirm your love for one another. This also keeps you healthier! Touching is important it demonstrates you care. Many couples only engage when it is sexual. Touching is not always about having sex. Whenever you do come together your physical intimacy will be a private & personal expression one to another.

For many anger is a way of life. They are nice at work, worship or in public but at home they are like a volcano waiting to erupt. The least little thing ticks them off! This does not have to be. You should be able to freely express however you are feeling. Keeping in mind that God is aware of ALL our thoughts as well as behavior wherever we are. He wants us all to have happy contented marriages. If you really want to impress someone try impressing God with the way you treat one another wherever you are. Welcome Him into the center of your marriage. After all you included Him within your vows! Or did you? God wants the Fruit of His Spirit present in our homes! The "Fruit of His Spirit is Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Long suffering, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self-Control. Against such things there is no law!" Guess what you can call on your Savior to Help You! God has a better way! His Holy Spirit is available as we humbly submit to Him and asked to be filled with His presence.

You must also begin to learn to submit to one another. Submission is an act of love. It is during submission you learn to take into consideration the needs of one another as a priority. Submission requires humility and discipline. You must learn to walk this path in a concerted cadence. Great marriages don’t just happen. It takes a willing, committed, man and woman to make a great marriage work. It really is worth it! Especially since you have committed to spend the rest of your life with this person. I pray you have not sentenced yourself or one another to a life of unhappiness. Please do not let ungodly people advise you about marriage. Many secular ways and man made theories for relationships have been embraced. No wonder there is such a growing number of divorces and separations within God's Church Family. Today many change partners like trying on a new pair of shoes. They keep trying others out until …

Today it is somewhere between 55% - 60% of marriages that fail. This was not meant to be. The Word says “What God has joined together let not man put asunder.” I think there is just cause in saying that God’s principles have been left out of the equation by one or both spouses. Somewhere along the line you have gotten off track. You cannot force your spouse to be committed. Many really do not honor their marriage vows. They too often honor the opinions of others. Were those vows just words? Or is it now that the world has presented you with so many alternatives, you consider your options? But is this really God's way? This has a lot to do with why so many Christian marriages as well as non Christian marriages are going awry.

Each partner in the marriage has a moral responsibility to make the marriage flourish. What happened to all that commitment you agreed to in your vows? A great marriage was not made to seem as though it was a sentence. It was designed to be a loving, enjoyable, healthy, fun, humorous, growing, mutually satisfying challenging, fulfilling partnership!

When building a great marriage it is very important to keep the fires of desire burning. Keep the embers of love aflame. God wants you to enjoy one another in every way! But not to drain the life out of one another. God wants you both to have balance within your lives. Do not allow the passion to fizzle out. Do not let people or things come between you. Continue to nurture and stir up the excitement you had that brought you together. Spend quality time together. Cherish the memories that brought you together. Nourish your marriage. Know God's definition of Love. If it has fizzled rekindle the flame. Don't take one another for granted. If you have please STOP!

A genuine relationship with the Lord does not come between you and your spouse. it brings you closer together. When GOD has center place in your marriage it brings balance. "GOD IS LOVE!"

Marriage Dating is great! Make sure you plan a weekly date night. Allow one another some space as well. It is natural to do things apart that you enjoy too. That just makes you value the time whenever you come together that much more! A great marriage should be tended like a precious antique. It gets better with age… You both become refined and your character develops. You have more in common.

Each marriage is uniquely different. Together discover what is enjoyable and continue to add flavor to your relationship no matter what age you are. And yes, a great marriage is still possible. Remember It takes working together! it is important to always keep the flames of love, trust, respect, intimacy, transparency and fun going… Continue to find ways to build a loving, healthy, relaxing, interesting, mutual enjoyable, fun home environment. First and foremost be responsible. This is what creates an endless circle of LOVE! Yes indeed! A Great Marriage is definitely possible!

Now That You Are Married!
Now That You Are Married!

How Do I Love Thee


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    • DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

      DeBorrah K Ogans 6 years ago

      Stars, I am really THANKFUL! The Lord made a wonderful thing when He created marriage! I believe that it is important not to take one another for granted! I can honestly say that we have a Great Marriage! I am humbled by your gracious compliments and do not take them lightly...

      GOD truly is GOOD! I have found the LORD to be truly FAITHFUL! He is utterly amazing! I give Him the credit because He certainly has made a way... We together have committed to HIS Will & HIS Way! His WORD is TRUE! "What GOD has joined together let not man put asunder..."

      So many marriages and families are breaking up! A Great Marriage takes work it is a continuing growing process... No two are alike it is what you make it!

      You and Joann are a wonderful couple and continue to inspire many as you continuously work together building a comfortable home for Becky... GOD BLESS ALL of YOU!

      In HIS Love, Grace, Joy, Peace & Blessings!

    • stars439 profile image

      stars439 6 years ago from Louisiana, The Magnolia and Pelican State.

      How wonderful that your marriage is so good. The beauty in your nature, and your love for God, and your dedication to honoring the word has built your beautiful home within your heart, and your husband. The wonderful joy of having a beautiful family comes from you, and your husband, and God, and the good minds of your children. God Bless You Precious heart for sharing the most wonderful advice that can keep marriages together. God Bless Your loving family on these Holidays of God called Christmas. Best wishes, and lots of love from Joann,and Becky, and I.

    • DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

      DeBorrah K Ogans 7 years ago

      Woman Of Courage, You are quite welcome! Feel free to share your insight... Please do stop by often! God Bless you too!

    • Woman Of Courage profile image

      Woman Of Courage 7 years ago

      Thank you Deborrah. I will be stopping by again. God bless you!

    • DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

      DeBorrah K Ogans 7 years ago

      Woman of Courage, Thank you! I totally agree about both spouses working together it makes all the difference in the world...! Welcome to The Hub Pages! I look forward to hearing more from you!

      Thank you for stopping by to share your insight! In HIS Love, Peace & Blessings!

    • Woman Of Courage profile image

      Woman Of Courage 7 years ago

      Your hubs are beautiful. I really value marriage. If both partners work together and truly commit themselves, marriage will not be so difficult.

    • DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

      DeBorrah K Ogans 7 years ago

      GmaGoldie, CONGRATULATIONS!!! PRAISE GOD!!! You have a marvelous opportunity to create a "GREAT MARRIAGE!!!" You two are the ultimate partners in LOVE...

      May the LORD BLESS you both and knit your hearts together in LOVE! May your home be a home of PEACE!!!

      You are so welcome! It is a pleasure! I feel the JOY in your heart; continue to let the "embers of Love" GROW in you and in your HOME always as well as all the other Fruit of HIS SPIRIT..." In HIS Love, Joy, Peace & BLESSINGS!


    • GmaGoldie profile image

      Kelly Kline Burnett 7 years ago from Madison, Wisconsin

      Oh, I love your Hubs! I am getting married to the love of my life in 8 days - very excited. Your Hubs are just so wonderful. Thank you!

    • DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

      DeBorrah K Ogans 8 years ago

      Habee, Yes we are! Have a great weekend! ENJOY! In His Love, Peace & Blessings!

    • DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

      DeBorrah K Ogans 8 years ago

      Greenlily, Congratulations! I pray that you have a Beautiful, Marvelous, Wonderful time celebrating! Please come back and share! Bravo! Praise God!

      Thank you for visiting, In His love, Peace & Blessings!

    • habee profile image

      Holle Abee 8 years ago from Georgia

      Beautiful hub, Deb! We're so fortunate to have found our soul mates!

    • Greenlily profile image

      Greenlily 8 years ago from Philippines

      My hubby and I will celebrate our silver (25th) wedding anniversary this June and with the help of God we were able to build a great marriage. Thanks DeBorrah, your article tackles very important points and very good reminder to couples like us.

    • DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

      DeBorrah K Ogans 8 years ago

      Leop, Thank you for taking the time to visit! Your kind comments are appreciated. It is my prayer to encourage couples to work towards building stronger, loving, happier marriages! I look forward to hearing from you in the future!


    • Leop profile image

      Leop 8 years ago

      Thank you for sharing this great information. Very important. Look forward in reading more. God bless.

    • DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

      DeBorrah K Ogans 8 years ago

      TruthTeller, Thank you for finding me! This is quite interesting! It is nice when you come across other couples who continue to embrace God's principles for marriage. Let's continue to encourage others to do so as well! Congratulations! Thank you for stopping by and please do come again! Blessings!

    • Truth_Teller profile image

      Truth_Teller 8 years ago from L.A. (Lower Alabama)

      I just found you online, and like what I found. It's interesting that your family and mine are much alike. We are approaching 41 years of marriage, are in shared ministry, have 4 children and 14 grandchildren.


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