ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

How Age can affect your Relationships.

Updated on December 16, 2013

Not bad for fifty!

When you feel the feeling you haven't felt before.

What is it about age? When do we realise that we are getting older? Is it only when your bones start to ache when you run up the stairs, or is it when you have been out all day, going to work, training in the local gym, or even deciding that I won't stay up very late tonight, as I feel really tired. I actually don't think that it is any of these things. We all are aware of the fact that every time we celebrate a birthday, it is another year on the clock, under the belt, whatever way you like to say it. we are all conscious of the fact that as we grow older, we change in some way. I remember when I was a teenager, I loved all the music that was pumped out in the clubs, even though I had my own type of music that I liked, I knew all the words to the songs in the top ten. I remember thinking to myself at the time, I would always love this sort of music, it is in me, I would never change. But time goes on, and you suddenly realise that actually, what you think was good, was only good because you were young, single and free. The excitement of climbing the stairs to the nightclub, hearing the music in the background, your heart fluttering because you just know that He is going to be there. Every note, every sound, gets embedded in your heart and mind. And you feel that you will be young forever.

Looking fed up!

A sobering Experience.

A strange thing happened to me the other night. I suddenly realised that it's not just me that is affected by my aging. I was so wrapped up in my own little world, not really taking a lot of notice that my body was aging, that I forgot how it would be accepted by the outside world. I have always been a flirt, it's in the genes! and even though I was picked on at school, and called ugly and spotty, hurtful things that go straight into your mind, and affect you for the rest of your life, it took me a couple of years after leaving school to realise, much to my surprise I might add, that actually I wasn't as hideous as they all made out. I never really had a lot of confidence with the opposite sex, but when I had a drink, alcoholic, then the shyness that overtook me at almost any other part of my life, was suddenly gone. When I say I had a drink, I never got drunk as such, as I was not that keen on alcohol. Oh, I had my moments, and I still do, but it is usually by accident, that I end up slightly inebriated! For example, if I am eating and drinking at a party, and think that I haven't really had a lot, but the next morning, well, all I can say is, never again!

So my point is that, when I have had a drink, I still act the same as usual, only a bit slower!

But back to the other night. I was invited to my friends birthday party at the local pub, and I was aware of the fact that an ex- boyfriend of mine was going to be there. He is a relative of my friend, and over the years we have got together a few times, nothing heavy, but just having a good time and a few weeks relationship here and there. I still liked him very much, but as I still live with my ex-husband, which I will explain about when I have more nerve to tell the world, I have always been reluctant to leave and go of with him. My boy friend as I will call him, is four years younger than me, and it was never a problem. Over the years he has asked me to go away with him, but as I said, I never could break away that easily, so we have had a on of sort of thing going on. More mental these days than physical, and I am sure you all know what I mean. Anyway, he turned up with his new girlfriend, and this was fine as I knew he was dating. But this was not the problem. She was twenty seven years old! He behaved like a proper gentleman and stayed with her all evening, but occasionally I noticed a small look in my direction. At this stage, I didn't realise that my age was a problem. It was, but not just for him. Another man took an interest in me, and even though I was very flatterered, I wasn't interested in him, but I did dance with him most of the night, as everyone else was part of a couple.

The trouble came later, when after being told that he liked me, my friend took me to one side and said, ' do you know John really fancies susan?' but she is married. Poor man!

I was astonished and mortified to suddenly realise the reason why he had said this. He had not taken any notice of her all night, but after being with me, he spoke to another friend of mine, and was told that I was fifty. That was that. I think he was about thirty eight. After hearing this, I suddenly looked across the dance floor at, I will call him, Pete, my boy friend, or more to the point man friend, and realised that is why he would never be interested in me again. This might sound a bit dramatic, but I realised that because his new girlfriend was in her twenties, he still felt young. Going out with someone of fifty would constantly show him that he is also aging. Don't ask me how I know this, I just do.

My point to all this? Age is a state of mind. The trouble is, however young you look, your age tells the world that you have experience, a past, and more to the point, there is something in our DNA that states that to be young is to be fruitful. We mate to procreate. The fun part is just an afterthought, albeit a good one. I realise now that time has galloped away with my genes, and I am no longer a contestant in the mating game. A very sobering experience.

So what do I do now? if I want to date, do I have to lie about my age? is that why women do all the time? I never thought there was much point in that, I presumed, wrongly, that to tell the world your age, especially if you look younger, would make people say, ' Ooh you certainly look good'. But now I know the truth. Your age is the one main factor in the game of producing children. And therefore, you are over the hill, and useless to be a mate.

I have never been attracted to older men, it is just me. Maybe I have forgotten that age has caught up with me in the dating game, maybe I thought that I would always look and be younger. But people see me differently now. And I cannot quite get used to it.

Maybe it is time to for me to grow up.


This website uses cookies

As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at:

Show Details
HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the or domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)