- Gender and Relationships»
- Relationship Problems & Advice
One constant complaint that I had on my parents was, they never appreciated, me or anyone for that instance, enough! Of late, I realize that the rare appreciative words that I get from them, means a lot to me!
Everyone yearns for appreciation, be it even a small thing. Little kids to elders expect them to be appreciated. Nobody wants to take criticism in any form!
My parents only appreciated me, when my work was perfect or at least nearly perfect. This made me little wild as other parents around me appreciated their kid for every small thing they did.
As I grew, I realized that appreciation for every small thing does help you to grow but not beyond a certain limit. Appreciations that you receive once you are perfect will mean nothing compared to the criticism you get when you were in early stages of achievement, as only those negative comments helped you to become perfect, else you would have become stagnant!
By criticism here, I mean effective and constructive comments and feedback and not the demotivating useless words. Observing a few people around, I realized one thing, encouragement is very different from appreciation.
I met with this one aunt in my family at her home who was continuously singing praise of her kids in front of them, from the moment I entered her home till I left. This created a strong impression in me on how I should encourage, motivate, appreciate and criticize my child in the process of parenting him/her.
Appreciating in excess makes anyone egoistic and over confident in turn making them non-receptive to effective criticism. This will only result in half-baked talents.
Be at office, as a boss, or at school, as a teacher, or at home, as a parent, it is very important to make the other person understand how to appreciate criticism in the right sense.
Of course, it also depends on who gives the criticism and how. Learning to be a good critic is an art! Criticize with grace and appreciate with feel. This will produce better individuals who are less sensitive and hence more productive in their work.
Well, a coin always has two sides, it is up to us to balance the coin! A correct balance with respect to appreciation and criticism is the best way to improve efficiency and performance in every sphere of life.