Asking The 17 Tough Questions That a Man Could Answer

a very unique game. A game where no one gets hurt, fired, or run out of the Continental United States. This game is pure fun. Take my word for it. I mean, how long have we known each other? And how many lies have I told you? Okay, then. Time for the Matrimony Reversal Game to begin.

Now for the groundwork and rules. Both are simple. The groundwork is for you to be my fiance and male of course—while I will portray your bride-to-be. The rule is simple and it should be because there is only one rule: I will be asking you, the groom, 17 crucial questions that will require you to be completely honest. Otherwise I will tell you quickly to hit the bricks because I am no one‘s fool.

17.) I see your photo at the top, and I must say that the One-Stop Foto Mat at Kmart did a decent job on your smile, but tell me . . .is that arrogant smile the REAL you? I need to know or else, we don‘t get matrimonial in two weeks or EVER!

16.) In the photo of you at the bottom, do I see a real hint of your laziness? Please be honest with me because I am not going to support you and myself.

15.) You told me last Friday night when you came over to pick me up, why did I smell liquor on you and your breath? Please tell me because I am not going to compete with you, booze and the DWIs.

14.) I was with you in your apartment last night and you had went to the bathroom, but left your phone on the end table—and a girl named Chi Chi called, so who is she? Time to be very honest with me because I hate liars.

12.) Are you gainfully-employed? Please humor my care about the bills and me having to pay them all.

11.) Who is, now tell me the whole truth, Cindy, Jana, and Margaret? Do not lie to me and tell me that these girls are all your cousins.

10.) Why is it when we visit my parents that you somehow find it necessary to leave because your colon has a kink in it? Enough is enough.

9.) Your probation officer called before you got home . . .why?

8.) You told me that last night you needed to go to the game with the guys, but my girlfriend saw you drinking and dancing in a bar named, Jugs and Suds . ..who is this Julie?

7.) Did I overhear you under your smelly breath to call my mom an old bag?

6.) My best girlfriend in the world came by last Thursday (before I got off work) and there you sat in the living room in your boxer shorts and asked if the shorts made your butt look big?

5.) When you and I go somewhere to eat and I have this need to talk to you, pray tell why when I m talking that you all but fall into the floor trying to see a cute girl who is sitting behind us . . .do you really think that you like other girls better than me?

4.) How come other couples hold hands in pubic, but you get hateful with me and say that you have a skin disease. . .is this true?

3.) Do you think that you are able to stand on your two legs and take out the trash?

2.) Last night during our night of passion, I heard you call a Millie‘s name, so is this the Millie who you dated before me?

1.) Last Tuesday you and I were sitting in the park and a young woman and her little son sat down on our bench, so why did her little boy keep calling you Daddy?

If you are a young lady preparing to wed your man friend, please ask him a few of these tough questions and see how he reacts. If he stumbles over his words, he is not being honest with you, but if he makes eye contact, then do not worry.

Have yourself a nice wedding and may you and your man live long, pure, and honest.

January 21, 2019__________________________________