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How to Make Others Like You?

Updated on August 11, 2012

Why bother?

Getting other individuals to like you in an important and valuable task. If you have an idea in work, some of your co-workers will not listen if they don't like you. This is not fair, yet it happens constantly in the business world. Others will pay attention to what you say more, think better of you, and having others like you makes you happy. Everyone wants to be loved with plenty of friends. When others like you, they try to stick around you.

1. Be genuinely interested in other people.

There is a wise saying that expresses this point very simply. "It is the individual who is not interested in his fellow men who has the greatest difficulties in life and provides the greatest injury to others. It is from among such individuals that all human failures spring." This might seem harsh. Even so, the saying is true. One of the most important facts is to show your personality proudly, much like a master showman. This basically means you know human nature. Every move you make planned and rehearsed in advance. This adds and creates a genuine interest in people. Every time you go out to the world, treat it as going onstage. Consider yourself honored that they are talking to you. The other person gives you a sense of self-accomplishment. Because of this, you should try to give them the very best they can. Try to make your show of interest as sincere as can be.

2. Smile

A smile is one of the most important factors in making friends. A smile says you are happy, satisfied, and possibly excited. However, do they know what you are happy about? It could be you are happy to see them, which is one of the important measures of smiling when you instantly see someone. Show all of the usual emotions when they tell you information that should be sad, happy, upsetting, worrying, etc. But always try to be positive and make them crack a smile back. Smiles are normally contagious. The effect of seeing a smile is extremely powerful. If you wear one, someone else will too. Then the other individual will feel a little happy as well. Even if you aren't happy at that moment. Most people are as happy as they decide to be. Your smile is like seeing sun after a week of rain, relaxing and exciting that just makes you satisfied. Be happy that you are making someone else happy. The thought helps when you need a smile really quick.

3. A person's name

A person's name is, to that individual, the best and most important sound in any language. People are very proud of their names, usually. When you first meet someone, know their name almost right away. One trick of remembering names consists of building a profile in your mind of someone. List facts about their business, family, and opinions in close relation to their name. By using this method, a few individuals remembered friends they had not seen in over a year! They could recall their children's names, ages of their pets, where they worked, their favorite foods, etc. You will be remembered for recalling their name as well. They will consider you special because most individuals do not recall names. Mainly because they do not take time or energy to concentrate and repeat names in their minds.

One of our nations greatest leaders, Franklin D. Roosevelt, realized that one of the simpliest and obvious methods of gaining good will was by remembering names to make others feel important. An example of his techniques would be that in conversation he would comment, "So sorry. I didn't get the name clearly. How is it spelled?". This might seem odd for a name easy to remember like Bob. Yet he would let them spell out their name and, during the conversation, would constantly repeat the name and associate it in his mind.

4. Be a good listener and encourage them to talk.

Focus desperately on the person as if they are the most important individual in the world. Don't seem distracted or pondering on what you will do when the conversation is ended. Just focus on them. A friend attempted this when the idea was explained. She commented what a woman said that she tried this on, "I really know you love me because whenever I want to talk to you about something you stop whtever you are doing and listen to me". Don't focus on how your day has been or what went wrong with your week. Wonder what happened in their week. Don't compare the two, just ask questions about them, their friends, their family, their co-workers, their business, etc. Make them believe the world revolves around them. Many people don't make good impressions beause they don't listen attentively. Some people just want a friendly and sympathetic listener so that they can talk about what is in their lives. That is all everyone wants when they are in trouble or have problems. Think of it like this, people who talk only about themselves think ony of themselves. If you want to be a good conversationalist, be attentive listener. Ask questions the other person will be happy to answer. Encourage them to talk about themselves, their accomplishments, their favorite moments.

5. Talk about the other person's interests.

Never underestimate the power of someone's interests. Going back to focus on Roosevelt, he would stay up late the night before and do research before meeting a new individual. He would ask and see what they enjoyed or were interested in; types of cars, types of flowers, how to garden, calligraphy, what they liked to read, what they liked to write, etc. He realized that the road to a person's heart is to talk about what that person treasures the most. Talking about their interests does not just help them. It also helps gain you knowledge and more friends in different areas you have never been to.

6. Make them feel important, sincerely.

It is easy to say a sentence that is meant to make someone feel important. However, it is different to make the saying become sincere. An old boss had many comments that were supposed to make his employees feel comfortable and valuable. Still, he never made them sound sincere, never from the heart. Instead, everything that was supposed to make us feel happy and comfortable working for him, just made his employees want a new manager. It's not just the words, it is also how the words are said.

Consider and follow the saying, "do unto others as you would have them do unto you". This is valuable information that you should use regularly. Show respect to the other individual. Tiny phrases make a difference. Try to use "I'm sorry to trouble/bother you", "would you be so kind to ___", "would you mind", "thank you", etc. These help anyone in everyday life. They make someone more comfortable, at ease, and is very polite. Sincere, heartfelt appreciation is just as touching as a smile, if not even more powerful. Speak from the heart, and followers will find you.


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