- Gender and Relationships
5 Bad Reasons to Get Married
There are reasons to get married, and there are reasons not to get married. There are also reasons which aren't quite good enough to get married and legally commit yourself to another person. The reasons I'm about to list should never be the sole reason behind any marriage proposal or proposal acceptance -- a bad, sad or unhappy marriage will just result in a divorce at some point anyway, which defeats the purpose of marrying for the wrong reasons. No matter how strong or determined you feel you or your partner to be, you owe it to yourself (and them) to avoid getting married for the wrong reasons. Read on for the Top 5 Bad Reasons to Get Married.
Things You Should Ask First!
Let me elaborate on this before the right-wing nutters start waxing religious. If you're in love with someone (and they with you) and an unexpected pregnancy prompts a marriage proposal, your goo-goo feelings may just be enough to make it work. But, if you get pregnant by some stranger you drunkenly shagged in the pub toilets, this is not a good enough reason to get married, sorry. I'm not saying you should or shouldn't give the pregnancy up, but I am saying you owe it to yourself and your potential child to live in a solid, stable environment -- and it's highly unlikely that your situation is going to resemble this if you marry someone you've known for a few months.
2. Biological Clock ticking.
If you're a 30 year old female who has been holding out for Mr. Right, but suddenly realizes that he may not exist, you're not going to do yourself any favors by latching onto the next guy who falls in love with you. Yes, sure, you've probably been too picky over the years and missed a few good opportunities -- but this is no excuse to go marrying the Deli boy who's been crushing on you for the last two years. Just because a man gives you extra pickles on your hero sandwich doesn't mean his love will last.
If you've been with a guy or girl you really dig, but aren't quite ready to take things to the next level, that's your prerogative. If your boyfriend or girlfriend can no longer cope without being married to you, you owe it to them to make a decision, but you don't owe them your hand in marriage unless you're ready to give it. Ultimatums force quick decisions made in haste and one should never make decisions that way unless they have to.
4. Marrying for visas.
If you're a foreigner wanting to marry a citizen of the country you want to move to -- think again. Not only can't you know the person you're marrying, but you'll also have to live with them for several years before you can get divorced (and legally remain in the country). That, and Immigration can do all kinds of things to you if they catch on. Marrying for visas or citizenship is illegal and I strongly recommend against it.
5. Because your family wants you to.
Middle Eastern families, Asian families and many other cultures are full of parents who pressure their kids to marry people they don't really want to marry. In some cases, this kind of pressure is even encouraged by the law. If you live in the US, UK or other Western society, do not allow your family to determine who you marry!