- Gender and Relationships
Becoming Disenchanted With Your Significant Other
Starting a relationship can often leave couples with rose-colored glasses. Being in love can leave us with a false impression that our significant other can do no wrong. At some point, whether it be early on or after years together, many couples end up becoming disenchanted with one another. While this is never a fun process, there are some things you can keep in mind and ask yourself that will help your relationship survive this process.
What's Making This Happen?
Have there been any major changes in your relationship recently? Or did this just happen out of nowhere? It is common for couples to become disenchanted with one another when they first move in together or begin married life. Taking any step where you increase your time together substantially has the potential to strain your relationship or your view of another person; the person you see every day going about their business is bound to be less glamorous than the person you go out to dinner with and get romantic gifts from. However, if you are beginning to question how perfect your significant other is when there have been no major changes, it could be a sign that they just aren't that perfect for you.
Remind Yourself of the Good Things
Take time once and a while to simply remember what you love about one another. Whether you make one night a week date night, take one night to stay in and be alone at home together, or just make an effort to show your appreciation for one another often, remembering what is great about this person and why you're with them is incredibly important to not letting the feeling of lackluster disrupt your relationship. In the busyness of everyday life, it is easy to lose sight of the great things and focus on the ordinary things, and this is where a lot of relationships strike problems. Taking a step back and seeing that the great things are there to make the ordinary things better is a great way to prevent this.
Take Time Apart
Have your own lives. As your relationship gets more serious, it becomes increasingly important to make time and space to be separate people. Have your own friends, your own hobbies, and your own interests. Spending every second of every day together will wear any relationship down quickly, and cause a lot of annoyance between the two of you. Time apart from one another will also let you better appreciate your time together.
Why Did We Make It This Far?
At the end of the day, you are with this person for a reason. All of the annoying habits and quirks they have were there when you met them, and you still fell for them. So don't let these things get in the way now that you're getting more serious. Just because they aren’t as impeccably perfect as they seemed at first glance, does not mean that they aren’t worth staying with, or that you shouldn’t work to keep things happy and healthy between the two of you. If the relationship isn't coming as easily as it used to, that doesn't necessarily mean it isn't as good. It means it's something that will take effort, but most of life's best things take work.