- Gender and Relationships»
- Advice & Tips for Men in Relationships
I recently read some answers to a question on forgiveness from a fellow hubber and it got me thinking about crying as an alternative to anger.
An old saying - the other side of ANGER is SADNESS.
A family member (who will have to remain anonymous) seemed to be the angriest person I have ever known and recently took me to task on something I did more than 10 years ago.
The truth was, not even their facts about what I had done were correct. He had got into trouble and asked me to help him out so he could keep his business afloat. I did follow through but I put a limit (even though I was gaining financially from the deal) on the time I was prepared to do what was required. I didn't just step out but let my brother take over and he got the benefits anyway.
Looking back I would not have put such a limit on things but my wife at the time advised me to and I (stupidly in hindsight) took her advice.
But keeping one person happy put me in a stew with the family member but I honestly didn't expect the grudge to last for over 10 years! My goodness - who lives like that?
Well some people DO LIVE like that and that is really SAD because this is not what I would call living so much as POISONING yourself with ANGER!
WHY do it?
ANGER has a lot going for it in terms of how COURAGEOUS it can make you FEEL - while men can derive a great deal of strength from ANGER - the alternatives - CRYING and SADNESS - especially in some cultures - seem not to be admissable.
But what is WRONG with CRYING - more specifically, what is wrong with MEN CRYING?
I've seen the most powerful of men (including presidents) crying so it can't be that bad, can it?
Do men crying look unattractive to you?