- Gender and Relationships»
- Dating & Online Dating
Cyber dating , webcam and texting...OH My!!
Is It progression or digression?
Love makes the world go round?!?
Progress is a wonderful thing, as long as the side effects are minimal and not terribly damaging. The cyber world has many advantages and many take advantage.......good and bad! A person can shop online, research, set up and cancel appointments , advertise products and I use my pc to make phone calls as well. What a great invention here!! However now we have to protect our pc from hackers that will steal your money, contact list and add hazardous programs to our expensive life in a box. Dating online is last but most certainly not least of my thoughts today!
Being single for the last few years has lead me to try the online dating. At first I was aprehensive about putting up a photo. Most turned me down flat and some said I must be butt ugly or worse. Never did I actually say what I felt at those times. Not that I am shy at all or even the submissive type but I was thinking you guys have a pic and I would guess that was your best hair day.......I wouldn't want to run my fingers thru it! However I just stated that I was not butt ugly but I would not want to become friends with anyone that judged on looks alone. I managed to get 2 dates without a picture up. One feel in love(lust) literally chased me around the kitchen table..........ughhh.. the other said he would love to have sex with me but he was looking for the girl next door . What came out of my mouth...I was even shocked! I told him " well she is probably a whore!" So he played with his new I touch until I was finished eating.
Last summer I had at least 32 first dates............let me try to recap a few really good ones. One guy had tattoos from the neck down and spent the day showing me each one and telling a story with it. Not a problem with tattoos..however that did seem a bit much for us 40 something generation. * hours we shared together. He was drooling over other chics when he wasn't rubbing the flesh off my knee caps. Finally at the end of this bizzare encounter.... he said " I like you alot and I am willing to wait for sex.....but by the third date I do expect." My reply ( as I was growing very tired of this cyber dating) "Why wait? Go home and !@#! yourself. He smiled and said really?? " You wanna have cybersex when I get home?" My words were muffled........"yeah right!" As I closed the door and said goodnite with my hand over my mouth coughing up a storm..........Don't call me I won't call you!
I have many stories that would have you thinking and laughing but will spare you anymore of the antics I had to endure to find one boyfriend (6 months we dated) and 2 good friends which one passed away recently. Many just wanna e-mail and instant messenger until they feel they know you well enough to ask for sex, and that is usually within an hour or the ones that want to marry quickly ( my guess for moral sex) I had 5 marriage proposal in a month and 3 never even met me.
What happened to getting to know someone slowly, a few hours here and there ! There are some nice guys online. I talked to many...and most of them were married looking for some excitement to come back in their lives. They were the most honest, very much gentlemans and really just wished their spouse would feel and make them feel the honeymoon love they had in the past. I will not date a married man so I just spoke of some things I thought might help them find that thrill within the marriage they promised .
The webcam is nice...I use it to show my mom and dad my poodles and a wave from me! Other than that it is distracting and annoying to watch someone type back to me or worse...they are in their own home and can show the caveman personna if they so choose!
Now I get text!! Text on my phone and my pc. I hardly know them and they are in a texting freenzy I guess. Nothing important...........Plus I have no idea as I have not met them and the username pops up.........I am just lost! Who are they and what are they yakkin about?
There are paid sites for online dating, freesites where you can upgrade and then pay. The same people are on all of them The online dating industry must be making a killing! Sure people are lonely, yes we all need someone........but is this really the way?
Over the past 2 and a half years I must have gone out with 100 people............talked to 500 and In all fairness...........I found around 20 of them to be articulate, witty and very honest about their feelings and thoughts. It was refreshing too! We spoke much about all the things we are told not to...ex. politics and religion. Open minded and compassionate people do not disrespect others thoughts and feelings, so it was very nice. These few men shared with me how the women on the sites only wanted sex and a sugar daddy. Some said yes they obliged and others said they really do not want to catch a STD.
At this point in my dating online experience it seems to be a cyber-circus and the acts are unkind, selfish and most people just either don't have the time to invest in getting to know another slowly or really just want sex for free. Knowing that I am not starved for attention or affection and have a sound mind.......I feel sure there are others out there as well and I have met a few.......so maybe it is I that has the problem with wanting to have a true friend first and not just dive in a fulltime relationship ........and the one nite stands ....well even if I do have a problem with that........it just isn't for me and never has been my style.
Refusing to just take anyone that will have me and to want a soulmate by my side may be asking much. My romantic side is still thriving and I do believe there is someone for everyone. Maybe they just missed each other at the bus stop or grocery store .