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5 Signs She's A Psycho

Updated on August 31, 2009

This is more or less an early warning system for men. I’ll be fair and say that women aren’t usually born psychotic, it’s something that tends to happen as a result of dating 3 or 4 morally challenged "players". You men know who you are!

Nevertheless, loads of unmarried chicks over the age of 30 have lost it a bit, thanks to those types of relationships. Sorry, ladies, it’s true - if you think you’re an exception, just skip the rest of the article!

(Although.. the fact that you’re reading this at all indicates something or other, doesn’t it?)

She rebuffs any effort you make at chivalry.

And I do mean chivalry – not chauvinism! If you open a door for Jane and she gives you a dirty look, that’s a red flag, buddy. If Jane follows it up with a line like “I can do it myself” you’ve got an extremely insecure female on your hands, and it’s best you let her walk through that doorway alone. If you act gentlemanly in a restaurant and she gets snippy - not only is she insecure, she’s also unsophisticated. What you have here is a 24 hour temper tantrum waiting to happen. Ditch the kid and find a woman.

She throws a fit if you want to spend a night with the boys.

This may seem innocent enough in the beginning, but it’s all just a ploy to get your attention back on her – where she thinks it belongs. The longer you date, the more justified she’s going to feel about it. Marry this chick, and you’re looking at your own personal War of the Roses. This girl either got way too much, or way too little, attention from Daddy. Unless you want to play surrogate, dump her and find someone normal.

She says I love you, or I hate you, way too soon.

There are two reasons women do this – they’re either trying to manipulate your emotions, or they have no control over their own. That’s not to say the phrases themselves are malicious; obviously they mean something to most people. But if the chick you’re dating says either in the first few weeks, something is up, and it’s not her self-esteem.

She wants to do everything for you.

She wants to cook, clean and be your personal wench. That may sound great, but this chick has serious issues. Not only is she clingy, she’s dependent. In other words, she needs you to need her, or she feels useless. Yeah, another self-esteem issue. Mind you, most women enjoy doing things for their man, and some even enjoy cooking, cleaning, etc. But not like an indentured servant. If she’s holding your slippers and newspaper every time you turn around, this chick’s a nut.

She can’t leave the house unless she’s dressed to the nines.

Yes, she looks great on the outside. Inside, she’s useless. This girl looks great on your arm, but the fact is, she’s so insecure about her appearance she can’t cope with the idea of someone seeing her in sweats or without makeup. While the good-looks may suit you, it’s the bigger picture you need to be concerned with. If she’s this miserable about any aspect of herself, we’re talking damaged goods, son.

There are other ways to tell if she’s a psycho, but most psychos will present with one of these “symptoms”. Keep an eye out for the screaming mimi’s who’ll eventually google their way to this article... you’ll be able to spot them via their indignant comments.

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