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Deal With Anger Today
ANGER IS SIMPLY EMOTION
Anger is simply one of the numerous emotions that are part of us. And of all the emotions that we have, anger is the worst.
Here are five things that anger does to you which makes anger the worst emotion.
1. Unlike smile, anger limits your life span. Health wise anger is one of the primary causes of heart related problems like pressure and depression. See how your heart beats faster when you are angry.
2. Anger makes you blind. Each time you allow yourself to drown in anger, you become totally blind and can’t see the good things surrounding you. You often trample on these good things surrounding you and drown in pity.
3. Anger closes doors. Each time you feel angered, you shun everything and hurt the people who are close to you – people who do not deserve tantrums. You even drive away people who could have been of help to you one way or the other and throw dust into the eyes of people who look up to you. Imagine a father hitting his wife in front of his nine year old son who looks up to him and consider him a hero.
4. Each time you allow anger to soak you, everything in your lives comes to a halt. The world moves on baby, and only you stand in front of the mirror with lips tightened.
5. Any time you show anger, you do not show how strong you are and that you command respect, instead you show how weak and vulnerable you are from the inside.
6. Anger causes you to do things, and later regret. You’d agree things once said cannot be taken back. So, why say so many horrible things when angry and pay for it later?
7. And if you are a believer, anger draws you a step back from your God.
I know by now, you are might be thinking, what about Jesus. This is where I come in with this scripture verse, Psalms 4: 4. Be angry, but do not sin.
Anger is not a sin, but allowing yourself to drown in anger and allowing the anger to drive you to do bad things is what makes it sinful.
Jesus showed anger in the chapel, when he drove away sellers who had turned the chapel into a market place. He needed to drive them out to make a point that, the house of God should not be turned into a sinful place where extortion, money lending and other sinful acts were taking place. Who knows whether there were also prostitutes moving in and out, serving their clients. We were only given examples of things that were going on, and Jesus needed to drive them out to teach us something.
Jesus’s anger was intended to prove a point, but when your anger causes you to murder or even commit suicide, what point have you proved?
Most of the time, when we are angry, we are blind and deaf, and are not in our right frame of mind, therefore, we cannot be like Jesus. We are not able to prove any sensible point. Rather we do worse things.
Now, let’s talk about some of the ways of dealing with anger.
Dealing with anger is not easy. It's tough, but there's a way.
The first and foremost thing to do is:
1. Accepting that anger is very, very bad for your health and that you are helpless without a remedy.
2. Identifying the root of your anger. Anger stems from many roots which are both internal and external. Internal roots may be injustice, unmet wants and needs, strife, impatience, and even jealousy. External may refer to that fact that you come from abusive families where both parents and siblings have not recognize the impact of anger, suppression, and injustice, etc.
Accepting that you at risk of developing heart related problems and identifying that you need help are the primary steps to dealing with anger.
The second thing to do is:
1. Grab the root of what makes you angry and uproot it. If it’s strive and injustice, face it. Stand up to the oppressor and tell them in the face that you don’t fear them anymore, because, if you don’t stand up to them and say no, you are just as guilty as they are.
2. Seek counseling if you can’t help yourself. Talking to a counselor would help you to ease up, and through the interaction, you’d come out with practical ways of dealing with your problem. You should also not forget that someone’s way of dealing with anger, may not be suitable and applicable to your case.
Other things you can do
1. Seek divine intervention if you’re too shy or too busy to sit with a counselor. Talk to God about your anger and leave everything to him. He would either cure your miraculously or give you situations that would help you develop anger defensive mechanisms.
2. Read the bible any time, you are angered.
3. Take a break or move away from the one who provoked you.
4. Do not focus on the manner in which the one who provoked you went about making you angry. Move away from him, clear your mind and meditate on the message the one who angered you was trying to put across. In most of the case, we do not listen, we only hear. What I mean by this is: If your wife tells you that, you do not come home early these days, what she actually meant is numerous. The message intended could be: she wants you to spend more time with her. But because we humans only hear, we interpret this as: What I do, is what puts money on the table.
Is money everything?
5. It’s better to limit dialogue whenever we are angry.
6. It’s not advisable to think through a problem and come out with solutions when you are angry. You don’t usually come out with anything good, as the anger in you masks everything.
7. You should also remember that, the world moves on and leaves you behind, each time you are angry.
8. Don’t forget, anger only shows that you are weak. You would never ever be accorded any honour or respect for demonstrating anger.
9. Laugh out the anger. You loose other people’s trust and close new doors, shun friends and families each time you demonstrate anger, so if you’re committed to maintaining good relationship with others, laugh out the anger.
Go meditating on this simple ways of dealing with anger and you’d see that you did not waste time reading this hub.
I love you all,
Any comments, corrections and suggestions are welcome. I really need to make this shine.