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Eternal Celibacy: Unsuspected Things That Will Doom You To It
Do you sometimes feel like you're doing everything right yet still end up getting the "just friends" excuse? Or worse -- the relentless "it's not you, it's me..."
Sounds too familiar?
If you've gotten used to women mysteriously vanishing after the first few dates leaving you everlastingly wondering why, you need this article. Here are some possible explanations for the loser -- in the litteral sense of the term: one who loses the girl.
1. Your female friends
Even a friend with the best of intentions can have a cock-blocking slip of the tongue in presence of your maiden. See, sometimes it's not even something you did or said -- but the people around you. So watch out for comments that could deeply (and irreversibly) hurt your image. If your female friends are the type to say things like "So you finally found a girl!" or "He's such a GOOD GUY, take care of him!" and other stuff that really makes you look pathetic and hopeless, it's guaranteed that your prospect will disappear quicker than a bunny from a magic hat.
And yes, it does make a difference whether it comes from a female friend rather than a male. What would otherwise be considered a casual, silly comment coming from a guy pal, is an emotional attack coming out of another woman's mouth (e.g. it triggers the bitch switch).
How to remedy to this: Don't introduce your prospect to your female friends too soon. If you have friends who like to poke at your eternal celibacy (or who like to downright make fun of you), KEEP THEM AWAY from your new gal until things have gotten serious with her.
2. Your past prospects
Girls you've tried (and failed) to go out with in the past and who are still lingering around. It's great if you've managed to stay friends but this is really nothing more than a nuisance and a big bright STOP sign to the eyes of your current belle. The more girls she knows you tried to be with (and failed more or less miserably), the less she (and any other woman for that matter) will be attracted to you.
How to remedy to this: Don't flirt in public (and FYI, a girl's Facebook wall is a public place) where millions of prospects will see that you're trying to get in her pants, thus will not ever see you as a potential mate. Ever. This is just a stupid way to ruin your chances with all the other available women out there. Also, when you're involved with someone, don't mention previous women you've tried (unsuccesfully) to get with, or worse, those who dumped you. In love, keep your failures to yourself -- nobody wants other people's trash. Plus, it could easily stem jealousy issues later on, and we don't want that.
3. Odd quirks
Do you have any quirks that might turn women off? Maybe you do but you just don't know it. It could just be a tiny detail that sabotages your true charm -- without you even realizing it! And women are extremely good and meticulous at finding these sorts of things... It could be something as banal as your voice, the way you walk, the shape of your head, your posture, your smell, etc, etc. My friend Cheryl for instance once dated a detective who was really into her, had all the great qualities (a sensitive guy with a gun, oh my...) and was ready for marriage. Well, she turned him down because he had... a girly laugh.
How to remedy to this: We all have habits we're not aware of. Yes, we do. So yeah, it might be hard to admit but sometimes, even if women insist on the fact that "it's not you", well... it is you, buddy. But hey, it's nothing we can't fix. So you need to find out if any of your bad habits could be a dealbreaker to women. Ask your best friends or family members, and ask them to be brutally honest. The answer(s) might surprise/shock you. Once you know what your quirks are, you can start working on them and not let them be an obstacle anymore to finding that special someone in your life.
Upcoming blogs: Good Guys Finish Last and The Jealousy Issue