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Falling In or Fallen Out

Updated on September 10, 2012

Sharing my Answer to Ms.Dora's Question

Falling in love is beautiful. Love songs are sang all the time. Novels will always be written about how people fall in love. Every experience is unique. First kiss are an act (In most cases-especially with girls) of falling in love for the first time.

Regardless of the bittersweet moments; anyone who has been or is 'in love', would agree (with at least some of these truth) Love is not selfish, it is not proud. It is giving unconditionally and seek only to give itself out.

It MAY hurt if you conceal the feeling because it is forbidden to reveal; because you are NOT suppose to bear such feelings towards the other person. Then again; true love does not seek to hurt others but to desire happiness for them. It is not lust or obsession,not idolization of the person.

Love, Lust, Obsession and Idolization

There is a thin line that separates Love,Lust, Obsession which is very much entwined to Idolization of person. When you love someone; you cherish them and hope for the best things in life for them. When you lust over a person, your thoughts tend to concentrate towards sexual based closeness. When you are obsessed with someone; you think about that person constantly and everything you plan and act upon are centered around this person; almost as if your whole lives revolve around the person. Whereas, when you idolize a person, you admire them, value them and put think highly of them. You try to imitate their behavior, their mentality, their preferences of everything. Even mimic their style. These are the differences that helps to separate the real and the fake.

Falling in Love in itself, otherwise; does not hurt EXCEPT when one party or both has fallen OUT of Love.

Growing Love

Each relationship teaches us something. If one would look into their past relationship(s) with an open mind and without the hindrances of bitterness in their hearts; they will (most people, most times) be able to point at the very least one lesson that they have learnt from that relationship. Be it in aspect of the relationship itself or something about themselves. I believe that absolutely nothing that goes in our lives experiences are without purpose. Sit back for a moment.

Break ups and failure in a relationship is not the end of the world. Many have heard that phrase before, but rarely a person with a wound in their chest (figuratively), smile and agrees readily. You do not expect them to say to you, "I'm glad you are telling me that."

Until a person who has learnt from the past stepped in again; with an easy composition and enjoy the blossoming of the relationship with the patience of a gardener; who waits and enjoy his garden each morning. He has sincere respect for the things he grows and even before his garden transforms into the beauty he longs it to be; he is able to delight in the process of it's growth. A person who cherish love, also delights in the sowing of love and nurturing it to maturity. This person is not surprise with changes because the person expects it and accept it as the natural.


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    • ginjill ashberry profile image

      Ashley TKL 5 years ago

      Thank you for sharing your thoughts, Toknowinfo. Love is a powerful emotion that can move the impossible. It can break and build a person. thanks again for dropping by!

    • toknowinfo profile image

      toknowinfo 5 years ago

      Relationships are tricky. But love is a wonderful feeling and even if it hurts to fall out of love, it is better to know the feeling, than to not, and I think worth the risk. Well done hub. Thank you for sharing it.

    • dashingscorpio profile image

      dashingscorpio 5 years ago

      Falling love is easy primarily because both people generally bend over backwards when they are attracted to one another and want to get to know each other better. The word (no) vanishes from our vocabulary. Every suggestion is generally met with a (yes). This causes us to (feel) we have met our "soulmate". We are on our (best behavior) and we make it our top priority to keep the other person happy. After all there is a lot of competition out there. It is not until after there is an emotional investment or (commitment) that a lot of folks display their "authentic self". This leads many of us to say, "He/She is not the same person I fell in love with." Shortly after the cycle repeats itself.

    • ginjill ashberry profile image

      Ashley TKL 5 years ago

      Hi, Ms.Dora..

      My pleasure.

      It's worth the risk when we learn to cherish those we love!

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 5 years ago from The Caribbean

      Thanks for your response. We can safely say that there is pain as well as pleasure in the love experience no matter how we describe it.