Falling in Love with Someone in an Arranged Marriage

I find it hard to believe that two individuals can fall in love with each other after meeting for an arranged marriage. There is that sense of feeling for reasons instead of love and happiness.

She met a man and wanted what she did not have in her life. Living with her parents for most of her life and acting out her single motherhood duties showed her it was time to find someone to take care of her.

Is she in love with this man?

I do not believe she is in love with this man.

Can you fall in love with someone you don't know?

They met on a Sunday and within a month of that Sunday they arranged to marry.

Was it love or the need to get used to each other?

To have everything she never had and to be with someone who can provide for her needs. Surely, she found her happiness in his wallet rather than his heart. They are not the happiest unless he has satisfied her with some money or bought her something nice.

An arranged marriage is not always about true love, or is it?

• They chatted for a while and found the chemistry between them.
• The woman knew what she got herself into from talking about the man through a friend.
• The friend knows the man and decides to get the two together.
• The excitement led to wedding arrangements and the rich man took her in so he could take care of her.
• He held on to his promised word and walking away is not how he chose to deal with the situation. She needed him and he needed a helper,
• She forces his touch on her and tries to make everything look perfect in their marriage, a hard way to achieve a good marriage.
• The good times are welcomed better than the hard-working times in this marriage.
• When couples get used to each other they can't live without one another.
• The confusion of being in love with someone and loving one becomes a problem in simple relationships.
• He likes his place and home and would rather work around the fields and work his day job instead of travelling to her place.
• When they travel to her place about four hours away, she is the happiest.
• Her actions show how happy she is and she tries to show others that she is happy in her marriage.
• The problem with that behaviour is that happiness is used differently.
• Mostly, when visiting her family. At times shopping makes her happy. She has stopped her husband from going on with his normal routine.
• He is not allowed to visit friends as he did in the past.

The gradual change has made him unhappy. In his eyes, he took her under his wing so she could have everything needed, and he would have a helper. Everything changed differently.

She has everything for herself and is not the helper he had in mind. Life changed for two people and happiness is not in their eyes. Their stressful lives are taking over slowly.

The arranged marriage has brought unhappiness to this man and he pretends to be happy. It shows on his face that he was happier before marriage.

Certainly arranged marriages don't work out, but couples still choose to stay together with the idea that that is how marriages are for everyone. In my opinion, it is not the same as any other marriage.

You don't know your partner and through the marriage, the little surprises open your eyes to someone ruining you. He wants to change her to make her what she is not, however, the woman sees her happiness is found in her needs and falls into his sweet conversations.

You can be attracted to anyone at first sight and want to have that person in your life. It won't work for you if you think of your needs only.

Arranged marriages work out for specific reasons. It is cultural and sometimes couples force their arranged marriage to work.

In this case, he wasn't sure if he would marry. She was sure to marry him after learning more from a friend. The information she got from her friend led her to believe this man was for her.

To fall in love with someone you don't know can be a problem in the marriage. In the example provided the woman has no idea of what her husband likes or dislikes.

• His habits annoy her.
• No compromises between them.
• She doesn't get him in conversations.
• Often her way is the best.
• The constant pleasing is making him unhappy.
• Arguments between them leave each other not talking for hours.
• Angry moments are not understood.
• He is judgmental toward her in the presence of others and makes her feel less worthy.
• Other people mean more to him than her.
• The stressful moments have caused him to have high blood pressure issues.
• Meals are not cooked often, so eating what is there is easiest.
• He changed her life in a good way and must face up to her nagging and her constant picking on him.
• The tough decision to stay with her is for cultural reasons.
• People in love don't behave this way.

Commitment is crucial to a relationship and that I do see here but it is mostly about her needs and not so much of his needs. They are used to each other and live that way.

True love is not about attractiveness and annoyance. He married because his friends are married. Falling in love with someone that you have not met or had no idea of before is a challenging effort.

She requires his full attention, another part of a relationship that often is a problem. A traditional man and doesn't see it that way. Communication in this arranged marriage has failed.

Traditionally the marriage is right for him; he wants a one-sided marriage. The kind of marriage where he can show his dominance toward her but is unhappy with the arrangement.

She seeks the good and avoids the bad times. In her mind, the good is happiness and the bad is not part of her marriage. Poor understanding and communication are issues for many couples.

She has a son from her first marriage and the connection between now the stepfather and the stepson is far from close. The stepson doesn't show any bad vibes; he is not close to this man and looks at his mother as being rescued from her previous life.

The families from both sides see how everyone has changed. She changed in having a good life and he changed for her and has become somewhat unhappy. They commit but are not clued up in their relationship.

There is an interest in each other and don't understand each other in many aspects. The lack of a connection between them is not seen closely. She doesn’t trust him and often checks who calls him on her cell phone.

The signs of jealousy and insecurity when he speaks to other women's friends.

Do you think love can grow between him and her?

People need to understand their emotions toward each other.

How do you know for sure if he loves you?

• On the surface, their marriage is happy and full of smiles.
• The tension between the couple is seen when together at home.
• The constant arguments in their relationship are gradually changing him.

Why should anyone in the relationship change for the other?

• You change gradually but for good reasons.
• True love does not make you want to be something you are not.
• Acceptance plays a big part in a marriage.
• You accept one another not change them for you who want them in your eyes.
• He is disappointed to have this woman in his life; he was not her first love.
• Moving on to a new chapter without expressing one's feelings is hard for both.
• The problem here, the couple is not educated about relationships in a marriage.
• They traditionally approach their marriage.
• It is important to be educated about such issues in life.
• People are different and have unique ways to guarantee their relationships.

You can't force yourself to fall in love with someone you don't know in an arranged marriage. It is stupid to think it will work out. He likes her and she likes him. Love is not in their favour.

He shows her empathy, meets her needs and lacks his needs. I do not know if two people can fall in love in an arranged marriage. They get used to one another and take their lives for granted.

She is there and will always be there because he is taking care of her needs. Friends think they know what is best for a couple and encourage relationships. These friends do not have a clue about what goes on in a relationship.

One expects relationships to be as theirs or as any other traditional one.