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Farting Men

Updated on October 8, 2013

lilmissbookworm asks the question, "When a man gets comfortable in a relationship, why do the feel the need to fart..." Here is the link to the question and answers.

I know I'm qualified to answer this one. I'm a man and yes................I fart. So that qualifies me as an expert. who knew my specialty would be required.


Relief

There are many reasons a man will fart in front of his woman.

Naturally you risk exploding if you don't release the gas. There are times that a man just has to release it. We've been holding it for hours while we accompanied you on your shopping trip. When our internal gauge sends us a warning we must let loose.

Of course if we planned better, we wouldn't be put into that position. However, since when have you known us men to be planners?

There is also the relief of finally having our woman accept us. Again, we've been holding it in since we met you. Now we've become a couple, and we are so excited that we forget to squeeze our cheeks.



Sharing

Believe it or not we want to share things with our woman. It also falls under the category of showing off. We love to share what we are good at. Farting just happens to be one. We also share our TV watching skills with you and you complain about that at times.

A Test

It's a test to see if you really are interested. You might be marriage material in our eyes. Part of the wedding ceremony is "for better or worst". Might as well get to the worst right away.

If you can endure our farting, then you are the girl for us. Farting bothers you then we might have to rethink this relationship

A Game

It's a game. You might want to play along. Rate the farts. Sound and smell. A scale of 1 to 10 works great

You can even try to identify the food that caused the fart. Eggs and other foods have a very distinctive smell.

Laziness

We are just lazy. It takes a lot of effort to get up and leave the room. We do that enough times and you will get annoyed at us. It's a no win situation.

I guess we could run a tube from our butt to the window, but that seems rather extreme. Seems uncomfortable too.

Your Fault

Did you ever stop to think it might me your fault. Exactly what are you feeding us when you cook dinner? You giving us a lot of foods that cause gas?

I suggest you start keeping a journal of our diet. Find the foods are are the problem and eliminate them from our diet. However, don't even think about cutting out the beer. Maybe switch us to a lite beer for lighter farts.

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    • strong woman 71 profile image

      Kelly Jakob 5 years ago from Tennessee

      This was great. My boyfriend and I have not been together but a few months but he takes farting to the next level, lol. Thanks for the information.

    • barbergirl28 profile image

      Stacy Harris 7 years ago from Hemet, Ca

      Ah - I always wondered why men were such fareters. My husband didn't even try to hold it in... he started farting early in our relationship. I guess he wanted to test me right away. I of course ignored it. It is, after all, human nature. We all do it, it just depends on the person whether we are proud of our treasure or whether we hide it. As women, it was taught to us to have manners out in public. Therefore we try to hold it as long as possible. I guess that thought will one day make it so all the women in the world disappear... why you may ask - because they all exploded from holding their farts in too long! :)

    • MartieCoetser profile image

      Martie Coetser 7 years ago from South Africa

      Your honesty deserves recognition. Lol! lilmissbookworm’s hub was really worthwhile the read. I laughed myself almost to pieces. This is a copy of my comment on her hub: Farting in the presence of others was in my books a synonym of rudely loosing one’s dignity and showing disrespect to others. But eventually (about a year ago) I conquer my own ego and realized in a non-snobbish way that some people are just more animal than others. My own ‘accidents’ also keeps me too humble to wink an eye in the presence of a farter/belcher.

      My mother-in-law (ex) always said before shamelessly breaking winds: “He who pays no rent must go.” Unfortunately I was not at all impressed with her, but today I smile, knowing that I took for too many years life, people and myself too serious.

      S-m-i-l-e :)

    • Jeannieinabottle profile image

      Jeannie InABottle 7 years ago from Baltimore, MD

      This is really important information of the subject of farting. I have learned so much. Thank you.

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