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Fascination Leads to destruction

Updated on June 19, 2013

The sun was setting and the clouds were hovering on the sky. I was standing in the balcony when suddenly a strong wind blew and took me into that gathering which I attended a fortnight ago. There I met my cousin with whom I fell in love before marriage. We met for the first time in a party where we stared each other unintentionally for a long time. After that we were from head to tail in love. Weeks turned into months and then years. We planned a cheering future together but never knew that it was nothing but a nightmare. We have not dated ever but family gatherings, social media and cell phone was the source of communication between us. And after I had completed graduation, one day my parents told me that they are going to get me married. I was stupefied and went into a deep shock. I felt my whole life was ended at that moment. I stumbled and went into my room somehow. I called and told him that everything is over. I wept and he consoled. My head was pounding harder and my whole world was crushed under a single decision took by my parents. Our plans were smashed and we felt helpless because the change in the decision of my parents seemed impossible. I had to obey because there was no such defect in that person which my parents choose for me. Yes, we were apart despite all our efforts and planning. I was sleepless for weeks. That pain in my heart was immeasurable and inexpressible. I don’t know much about him because of the marriage was near and I had to sit in the gatherings of my friends and family. I just remember we were both grieved but I had to surrender and I did. I lost the love, I love the most. On my marriage ceremony he was there, sitting alone in the corner. He had an eye contact twice but what I felt at the moment can’t be expressed in words because some feelings can only be felt. Such situations in your life either make you or break you but I was blessed and lucky that it made me. This incident had changed the course of my life and taught me much. Time has healed everything and I realized that nothing lasts forever. A fortnight back in that gathering we met again. He was married and happy in his life and so, I am. Remember no one dies without anyone. These are just verbal dialogues.

The root cause of my story is in front of you. Now let me confess my mistakes. Firstly, I used to watch a serial in days when I was in relation which almost matched my story. I used to feel that we shall also get out of the hardships as they did in the serial. But later I realized that this is just a fantasy and should be treated as such. Do watch serials, movies etc but make sure that you are prudent enough to take lessons out of it rather than just enjoying them. Secondly, social media and telephone networks had played their role fully in ruining my life but I was at mistake. Thirdly, I used to listen songs after we broke up which diffused my soul and pulled me into the bleakness. And lastly but the foremost of all was that I lost self-control. Implant the fact that first of all the vision (eye) sways, then the heart strays and the result of which is known to all of you. All of that started with just a single sight which wrecked my life later. I repented on all my mistakes and I regret I would have a strong grip on my conscience because when you treat it with leniency it takes no time to lead you towards devilish paths. I seek for forgiveness.

Friends! This worldly love is nothing more than a time pass and some transitory feelings and that’s all!!! If you really love a person and want those as your spouse then don’t indulge into “Haram relations” today and hoping that they would turn into “Halal” ones tomorrow. Ask your parents to allow you to marry him/her because without having a Halal relation how can you be so blunt to break the sacred limits set by Allah mighty?

If you have ever been through such a situation then ask for forgiveness because He is always ready to forgive you and shower his blessings upon you. Doing sins today and hoping that you will ask for forgiveness is itself a sin which is unforgiveable. Be realistic in life because your life is not a tableau to entertain others and inculcate this in your mind that there is no market where you can advertise your sorrows. People may enjoy or some may betray you but at the end He is yours. Turn towards Him before its late and you would not be able to say a single word.

Allah Almighty says,

Come and walk on my path, I shall make the rest of worlds yours.

So which deal is better, you have to decide. There may be fun in doing sins but there is no peace in it. Your heart should be that much pure that if the world would see your thoughts and intentions of heart then you don’t have to be shameful in front of anyone. We should try and try because a little good deed is always better than doing nothing and sometimes such intentions becomes the source of your forgiveness by Allah mighty.

Scrutinize your life and see where you are standing? Indulging into haram relations today and hoping that they would turn into halal ones tomorrow. Who promised you tomorrow???

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    • profile image

      sanniya 4 years ago

      good one

      Allah says in the Holy Quran

      "Tell believers to lower their gaze, and tell the believing women to lower their gaze." (24:30,31)

    • profile image

      Abdul rehman 4 years ago

      Exactly our society has this problem. May ALLAH guide us to right path.

    • mathsmaster profile image
      Author

      Hassan Shahbaz 4 years ago from Islamabad, Pakistan

      Ameen

    • profile image

      Ameer Hamza Cheema 4 years ago

      Good one but Writer seems to have some Taliban_ish touch....

      He/She needs some consultancy over it...........

    • profile image

      shahid 4 years ago

      talibanish touch????? u dont bloody know wat islam is all about. dont tag a nice article with talibans u burger boi

    • mathsmaster profile image
      Author

      Hassan Shahbaz 4 years ago from Islamabad, Pakistan

      islamic way mein sochna ya realities ko face karney ke baad realize kar ke Allah talla ki taraf laut jana talibanism bilkul nahi ha...ye apki soch pe depend karta how u conclude it

    • profile image

      Muzammil 4 years ago

      She is citing a case where she is repenting over her "mistake"..she didnt love him. And her lover had not dared enough even to talk to her parents. All in all it was, for need of a better word, a flirtatious relation and it doesnt apply in all the situations.

      I might be wrong and I could be, because I dont know what situation they were in. True love, both in the divine and earthly sense is TRUE. period.

    • profile image

      123 4 years ago

      U have written a beautiful article... I completely agree with u... But 1 thing which us still unclear in my head, i know it is wrong, i know it should not be done in this way, but how can i leave it? I don't know how to leaves such things nd such sutuations???

    • Farooq Siddiq profile image

      Farooq Siddiq 4 years ago

      very nice

    • profile image

      Ameer Hamza Cheema 4 years ago

      talibanish touch????? u dont bloody know wat islam is all about. dont tag a nice article with talibans u burger boi

      This is comment of a really nice person who also knows Islam very well... Impressed.........

    • profile image

      Kashif Ali 4 years ago

      It's all for those who have doubts for this article.

      All Muslims know about " Halal n Haram relations" defined by Allah Almighty. It's clear and make you clear before time goes away.

      islaah uskey liye hoti hai jisy khud chaah hoti hai. (Think about it)

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      amna tasawar 4 years ago

      I think if we are really serious about someone and want to make it Halaal we must try to stand for it.

    • mathsmaster profile image
      Author

      Hassan Shahbaz 4 years ago from Islamabad, Pakistan

      ahan.. there is a correct way for doing all the things..

      No need to make the contacts secretly. If u are true enough then move ahead and talk with ur parents about the matter.

      but the way we people choose is absolutely wrong.. In we commit many different types of sins in addition to talking with na-mehrams

      Hope you understand.

    • profile image

      Azwar 4 years ago

      a nicely written article and a well needed message.

      anybody can develop a feeling for opposite gender its natural thats why islam has ordered us to lower our gaze. but if it happens somehow the appropriate way is to talk your elders into it. and if you can't convince your elders than its better to end the matter there .

    • profile image

      javeria 4 years ago

      am speechless over it (y) jo kaam b chup kr kiya jae, wo zroor galat e hota hy,, @123 u asked dat how can u leave this awl, dear just repent of all that u did in past, realizae dat itx gunah, it will take time but u can do anything if u really want to du it :) bless you!

    • profile image

      Kassam 4 years ago

      Well, for the first time i read this article it made me rethink about my relation for a while. But then i read it again and seriously everything that you've written and everything you've been through is all a fuckery.

      First of all your relationship was nothing more than just a typical-21st-Century-Flirtationship, if your love was true and pure either you or your so called lover WOULD have dared asking your parents, which he didn't and hence proved that he didn't love you and it was really a fantasy you were living. If you really are dedicated to someone, you would definitely find the right path to keep your relation alive and to be together. But that's only if 'both' want to. And repenting later is only telling me that your relation wasn't pure by any means, it was just a fantasy you were living and not love.

      Summing up everything, This article is a babble, a baloney.

    • profile image

      Sam 4 years ago

      To one who said ahow can i leave.. Bro.. If you lOve that girl., if u really love her, and you feel bad about talking to her, secretly, then man up! you go tell your parents or tell her parents. If u cant talk to parents then Leave her Alone and walk aWay! But if u really love her then dont stick to her long.. Coz u will be gOing to cause her that kind of suffering later on!

    • mathsmaster profile image
      Author

      Hassan Shahbaz 4 years ago from Islamabad, Pakistan

      @Kassam!

      With due respect, I want to state that this might be “YOUR” way of thinking but not of the whole crop. Are u cock sure that u have not ever did verbal or visual r***? Does Islam allow you to do all that? Do you really think you are doing right that indulging in a relationship which is secret till now? I have not discussed that minority whose love is true and they go to any end to get their loved ones but I have highlighted the environment of today’s era where guys n girls do this !! They take oaths to be together and when time comes they go away. Even in other situations you are not courageous enough to tell or sometimes circumstances force lovers to be apart no matter how much they love each other. (This has been witnessed millions of times)

      Between I am shocked at your level of insularity that “a person repents on his/her sins only when his relation is not true by any means”… this is enough to show your height of assimilating a social issue. I won’t be abusive like you and I won’t prefer to be. What you think is adherent to your way of thinking. Stick to your relation in a way you want. and about the comment on this article I welcome whole heartedly all sorts of views.

    • profile image

      Rising Sun 4 years ago

      I'm agree with you But the point is,

      Sometimes in life its difficult to decide what is wrong?

      "A lie that draws a smile..."Or" The truth that draws a tear.....

    • profile image

      Aqsa 4 years ago

      Really amazing one a very nice and good way to highlight the main and fast growing issue...

      May Allah give us strnegth and courage to follow the right path in our Life.Aameen:)

      A nice saying that

      " Turn to Allah before you return to Allah".

    • profile image

      Aqsa 4 years ago

      Really amazing one a very nice and good way to highlight the main and fast growing issue...

      May Allah give us strnegth and courage to follow the right path in our Life.Aameen:)

      A nice saying that

      " Turn to Allah before you return to Allah".

    • profile image

      rameen 4 years ago

      It was awesome

      May Allah pak show us the right path ameen !!

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      Someonestrange 4 years ago

      Hi Mathy Please publish this as your Hubpage,

      Here is my story Firstly I am from Pakistan, a boy and I give credit to Allah for guiding me. Now read my story that I tell at the end.

      There many problems in the society, I am not going talk of them , we should read Holy Quran everyday, I am not going to say this.

      What I am saying is that , people actually don't follow Islam neither the parents nor the children. Some months ago I told my mother about the girl I like , and it took me 3 years to tell her that. Though for most of you it is still very early i.e at a age you get your ID card.

      The problem is that young people should realize that their parents would be making the plans of their marriage sooner or later, and parents should realize that their kids have more HORMONES then them , so they are supposed to be married some day. Now come to the telling part , to all of you my parents are not supporting too much, neither they are modern but one day I took courage and told everything and same on the other side, actually within 30 days of getting a yes. There is still no contact between us , ( That's strange, yes it is ).

      The thing I always perused early marriages , A girl can live in her parents house, why not she can live with her husband and study and plan a family after study, You need money for a young couple, The parents of the boy can take care of 2, 3 or 4 children then why not one more as their own daughter,

      There are a thousand reasons I give in support of my proposition and hundreds of benefits of doing this,

      But I ask you a Question First Do you have a better idea.

      I see girls and boys going out , interacting and having just fun at festivals etc. In CO environments, Is that all allowed? That is another thing but wouldn't that be better if they have a life partner (married) to enjoy with , to go on a walk, to watch something good, or in a park or to Murree hills.

      Wouldn't that be better , that's a boy just ruining hours on Facebook, or Movies and music, If married early would be given that time to his family at an early age.

      And coming back to Co world, Do you know what actually the moral values of people? You know that what happens, and what kind of talks go... Wouldn't that be all gone if a girl knew that there is someone for me , to whom I am going after this University so be good here. And same for boy. It is proven that testosterone level goes down after

      marriage, just search it on Wikipedia, "testosterone in relationship"

      So I boy would be more decent while moving out, I think.

      I know I am wrong there are a thousand hurdles in it , but let me tell you Humans are highly adaptable, and they accept what is prevalent in society , If society starts a modern early marriage with study and marriage can go hand in hand.

      We think that we need to have , a carrier and a lot of money before marriage, so does West. There is a human need of comfort from someone special, and Western people fulfil it through having Girlfriends, and for girls of course Boyfriends. So how here that is possible and eventually I see it as inevitable future.

      Can't people here get that comfort from a marriage, Do you know what the Allah says in Quran,

      " Let them marry and if they are poor , Allah will grant them money"

      And the prophet said knowing the fact that it is very hard to control yourself

      O young people if you have money , go and marry and if you don't have it, keep on fasting because it will diminish your sexual powers.

      ( not bundles he meant that we need today because of traditions just a little money to take care of her)

      Lastly the best solution we have is a life partner as early as possible, You know the first one you like is always someone special , you can never forget. So why not let your life partner to be that first one.

      The only way to do it is to talk to parents whenever you like someone, otherwise anything can happen, and for parents I would say please try it this way , You allow your boys and girls to go out, to have fun, and even live in hostels away from you.

      So why not have them married at an early age, education should continue so does the family.

      I know all I have said seems wrong to you, but If you have a better solution for prevailing , modern relations, immoral behaviors , bad eyes, and boy girl, interactions. Then please let me know.

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      mahnoor 4 years ago

      i am just suffering from this situation .i love hinm so much but i want to stop it there before it get very late i dnt knw how to leave all this i want a guid

    • mathsmaster profile image
      Author

      Hassan Shahbaz 4 years ago from Islamabad, Pakistan

      Mahnoor you have to do this on your own. No external source is going to help you.

      You have to make your heart realize whats right for you and whats wrong.

      Now you now well what you are doing is not allowed.. So you have to quit. It will be hard no doubt but it will save you from many problems..

      Do try to quit as soon as possible. Also make him realize that you people are wrong , in case you people are in contact..

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