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Five Annoying Facebook Friends (You have them all!)

Updated on February 17, 2013
5 Most Annoying Facebook Friends - The One Topic Wonder, Painful Writer, Woe is Me, My Life is Perfect (Be Jealous!) and the Vague friend.   They are the 5 facebook friends we love to hate!
5 Most Annoying Facebook Friends - The One Topic Wonder, Painful Writer, Woe is Me, My Life is Perfect (Be Jealous!) and the Vague friend. They are the 5 facebook friends we love to hate! | Source

Five Most Annoying Facebook Friend Types

Facebook is a wonderful place to keep in touch with long lost friends and family and lets you feel "in the loop" with people you haven't spoken to in years. Facebook can turn acquaintances into friends, and solidify the friendships you have. Unfortunately the price we pay for this privilege is we get to deal with the five most annoying friend types. If you have 50 friends or more, I can almost guarantee you probably have at least one of each of these Annoying Facebook Friends.

The One Topic Wonder

This person only has one thing on their mind, and it's obvious to everyone what it is, because it's all they ever write about, comment amount, post links about, etc. This is fine if you have a professional account or similar account where people "like" you simply to follow your rantings, but if you're just Joe from down the street, then you're likely annoying your friends.

What does the One Topic Wonder go on about? A One Topic Wonder can go on and on about anything. Many are religious, some are sports types, but most that I've encountered tend to be political types.

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FBGrl I need a new car but I'm having trouble finding a good used one. Any suggestions?

1 comment

OneTopicWonder It wouldn't be so hard to find a good used car if OBAMA the NON AMERICAN hadn't had that stupid cash-for-clunkers program!

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FBDAD Wow, my daughter doesn't like hardly any of the school lunches this year, I need some serious advice on things to pack in a school lunch.

3 comments

NormalFBuser Grapes, sandwiches, wraps, little apple juice cartons, raisins, cheese sticks... Johnny's a picky eater too, I probably have a million more suggestions. Ask if you need them! :)

NormalUser Twinkies!

OneTopicWonder If FemiNazi Michelle Obama wasn't so into "HEALTHY EATING" the school lunches wouldn't SUCK this year!


The Painful Writer

Most facebook users seem to attempt to use proper spelling and somewhat proper grammar. Nobody's perfect, and nobody is expecting it, but if you can't string 7 words together into a semi coherent sentence, then I can't read your status update. It shouldn't be painful to read your writing.

There are many ways to become a painful writer. You can use nothing but Facebook shorthand and text gobbelty-goop, you can use preschool-level spelling, OR you can use the caps/lower case alternating layout. All of these will make your writing painful, if not impossible, to read.

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PainfulWriter Had gr8 day w BF & luvr @ prk& OMG BF ripped his jeans 2 funny LOL

PainfulWriter I wish I can go up in a hot ayr buloon! I seen a awsom 1 2day!

PainfulWriter cAnT WaIt 4 SuMmEr To CoMe! I aM sO sIcK oF aLl ThE SnOw aNd CoLd. CoMe On SuMmEr!!!!!

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For this offense, you might just have to be deleted. At least the annoying One Hit Wonder can at least be amusing at times. Trying to decipher what the Painful Writer is trying to say is almost worse than having a tooth extracted.

The Woe Is Me Friend

This person really belongs in one of those sad country songs. Every status update has you begging to feel sorry for them. Nothing in their life ever goes right and if they aren't complaining, they aren't saying anything at all.

Perhaps Woe Is Me Friend doesn't realize that they are constantly annoying everyone on their friend list by all their sob stories, or maybe they do and it just gives them more things to feel sorry for themselves about. Either way, since their dog died, they broke their tooth, lost their job AND their truck broke down, you would feel bad defriending them. At least it helps you appreciate your own life a little more.

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WoeIsMe So today I was on my way to the store and the front tire on my truck blew. When I pulled over to get out and look at it, I dropped my cell phone and the screen shattered. Can anything ever go right?

WoeIsMe Lost my wallet today and my entire paycheck, can't afford new tires now or to pay my light bill. Why does this stuff only happen to me!?!

WoeIsMe Went to the doctor and he said I have a strange toe fungus that can only be gotten rid of with a very expensive medicine. I can't afford it! FML!!

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Yeah, we get it Woe, your life sucks. So does everyone else's. But most people keep it to themselves when they're broke or have strange fungi.

My Life Is Perfect (BE JEALOUS!) Friend

The My Life Is Perfect friend gets under your skin daily. You know that nobody's life is perfect but with the constant status updates from their romantic vacations, pictures of themselves in swimsuits (looking good!) and constant updating about their children's many accomplishments and how the work on their new pool is coming along, you can't help but be jealous.

This is the friend we love to hate. It's like a glimpse into the life that you wish you had, but you hate the person living it. You stare at the photo they uploaded of their kid playing (nicely) in the perfectly clean house (no finger prints on the window in the background? No way!) looking for any little flaw. When something goes wrong in this FB friend's life, we rejoice.

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LifeIsPerfect - Been so busy lately, haven't had time for an update! Just got home from Cancun. It was beautiful, we loved it so much last time, we decided to go twice this year! You'll have to check out the pics of us at the beach, isn't the water sooo blue? Anyway, Johnny shot the game winning basket at the game last week and now their team is headed to state! Can't wait to go! I organized a bake sale to help raise money for the team to get new warm up suits so stop by the church on Friday to pick up some goodies. My famous snicker doodles will be there!

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Yeah, we hate you, and we'll probably stop by the church to get snicker doodles and be super nice to you hoping that something you've got will rub off on our lowly selves.

Vague Friend

So there always seems to be one friend who is always writing vague things as their status updates. Sometimes these seem to be geared toward a specific person, and sometimes it's like they are just begging you to ask them what they're talking about (I won't do it, I won't get suckered into their game.) I have determined that Vague Friend is not someone to trust in Real Life, they will take their passive-aggressive argument to Facebook. Plus if you are friends with this person in real life, you'll always be wondering, "Is this status update about me?"

VagueFriend I think it's so sad when a 40 year old woman doesn't have enough decency to tell you to your face that they are mad at you.

VagueFriend Pray for me!

VagueFriend Don't you hate it when someone is only your friend when it's convenient to them?

VagueFriend is Unappreciated!!

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These posts drive me crazy! If you don't want me to know what you are talking about, don't put it on Facebook. If you do want me to know what you are talking about, then just spit it out!

The subsequent 20 posts asking if everything is okay, and people worried that Vague Friend is talking about them is MORE annoying though!

We could just delete them...

We could just delete these Facebook friends ,and perhaps we probably should, but we don't. For some sick reason we are actually entertained by all of these annoying facebook friends, and sometimes we can't wait to read whatever idiotic (or annoyingly perfect) thing they are going to say next.

Isn't that the true joy of Facebook? It's kind of like high school, all types of personalities merging in one place, it's not always pretty, but it's usually entertaining!

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    • Alecia Murphy profile image

      Alecia Murphy 4 years ago from Wilmington, North Carolina

      Very funny and true hub. For the most part I don't have problems with my Facebook friends. If I did, I would have to do something about it. But I agree some people don't get the message about how the come off but I'm sure the same could apply to real life. Great job!

    • kashmir56 profile image

      Thomas Silvia 4 years ago from Massachusetts

      Great hub well done. I to don't have any problems with my Facebook friends,99% of them i bloged with for eight and a half years,so we all get along very well.

    • ripplemaker profile image

      Michelle Simtoco 4 years ago from Cebu, Philippines

      What you wrote made me laugh. I think I would be annoyed with that spelling thingy as it is too hard to read. I think I stumbled onto some challenges when I accepted friend requests of people that I don't know. :D

      Congratulations on your Hubnuggets nomination. Maybe you can share this with your facebook friends and have them vote for your hub right here https://hubpages.com/community/A-HubNugget-Magic-L... (wink)

    • Mandy M S profile image
      Author

      Mandy M S 4 years ago

      Thank you everyone!! I'm so excited about my HubNugget nomination! lol I don't think I will share with my Facebook friends though, because I think it's pretty clear which of my friends I'm talking about here, and I think I might then become the annoying facebook friend. :)

      Jealous of those of you who don't have any annoying facebook friends. I have quite a few! But, I do enjoy them all.

    • Sharkye11 profile image

      Jayme Kinsey 4 years ago from Oklahoma

      Congrats on your nomination! The hub deserves it! Well written, and dead-on accurate. I just deleted OneTopicWonder and VagueFriend this week! Sadly, they were related. But distantly, so I don't think it is a breach in social manners. Thanks for the smile!

    • Mandy M S profile image
      Author

      Mandy M S 4 years ago

      Thanks! Haha! At least you delete your annoying friends, I just can't seem to do it. Most of the worst ones are relatives. :)

    • MamaTschet profile image

      MamaTschet 4 years ago from Northern Colorado

      This hit a little too close to home. I think I am one of these annoying facebook friends!! Uh oh, time to rethink my status updates and comments. Congrats on the nomination too!

    • Mandy M S profile image
      Author

      Mandy M S 4 years ago

      Uh Oh, MamaTschet, I hate it when I'm reading along and realize that the article is talking about me! :) I'm guilty of some of these myself, it's just some people do it all the time.

    • Mandy M S profile image
      Author

      Mandy M S 4 years ago

      I WON THE HUBNUGGET AWARD!! :) I don't really know what that means, but mine got the most votes in the section and I got a cute little sticker on my profile.

      THANKS to everyone who voted!!!!

    • MamaTschet profile image

      MamaTschet 4 years ago from Northern Colorado

      Congrats!! Well deserved!! Keep up the good work.

    • Mandy M S profile image
      Author

      Mandy M S 4 years ago

      Thanks!! :)

    • savingkathy profile image

      Kathy Sima 4 years ago from Ontario, Canada

      I loved this hub! Thanks for the laughs. I'm sure most of the people reading this immediately thought of one or two people who fit most, if not all, of these descriptions. I know I did! Congratulations on your Hub Nugget award.

    • ChristinS profile image

      Christin Sander 4 years ago from Midwest

      Very funny! As someone who spends entirely too much time on Facebook I have seen all of these and then some :) great hub

    • visionandfocus profile image

      visionandfocus 4 years ago from North York, Canada

      Hilarious! My pet peeve is the Painful Writer. If an adult can't tell the difference between (its) and (it's) or between (your) and (you're), I feel like screaming and mentally label them a moron. I'm sorry but one has to draw the line somewhere. Heck, they probably label me a grammar nazi, but at least I can spell and type like a normal human being. Rant over. lol

    • prektjr.dc profile image

      Debbie Carey 4 years ago from Riverton, KS, USA

      Wonderfully hilarious hub!! Congratulations on your hubnugget nomination! Well deserved! I'm looking forward to following your writing!

    • DeborahNeyens profile image

      Deborah Neyens 4 years ago from Iowa

      Love this Hub. So true! Great job, and congrats on your Hubnugget!

    • randomcreative profile image

      Rose Clearfield 4 years ago from Milwaukee, Wisconsin

      So true. Nicely done. Congrats on your nomination!

    • truefaith7 profile image

      truefaith7 4 years ago from USA

      How about the sixth friend: The Facebook friend who says absolutely nothing to you whatsoever, but shares a massive amount of videos, pics, game requests, quizzes, etc and considers that a "status"?? Since they're your neighbor, cousin, or whatever and would probably take offense at being unfriended, you quietly hide their posts from your wall....

      Anyway, loved the hub! It was funny and so true about the Facebook experience! Voted Funny, Awesome, and Interesting!

    • Mandy M S profile image
      Author

      Mandy M S 4 years ago

      Oh yeah truefaith - The Spammer. That should have been one! Maybe next time. :)

      Thanks Random, Deborah, Prek

      Vision - I hate it when adults haven't made it past second grade spelling and grammar...

      Thanks Kristin and SavingKathy!

    • wandererh profile image

      David Lim 4 years ago from Singapore

      I had a friend request from someone who seems to know me but, for the life of me, I can't remember where or if I did meet him. The name and face looks familiar but I can't place him. We exchanged a few emails talking about general things, and to this day, I can't remember where I knew him from.

      I'm think that many will have friends like that and they are definitely annoying since you are trying to place them but can't seem while they seem to know you pretty well ... and you are too polite to ask them straight out who they are. :)

    • idigwebsites profile image

      idigwebsites 4 years ago from United States

      Another annoying friend: the one who sends game requests you don't really need.

      Enjoyed your hub a lot, Mandy! :D

    • JayeWisdom profile image

      Jaye Denman 4 years ago from Deep South, USA

      I "un-joined" Facebook a couple of years ago after witnessing someone I know actually disown two of her children in that very public venue! Either people are telling all their "friends" and their "friends' friends" by extension too much information that should be private, or they're posting incredibly boring "status" reports. Call me an "old fogey", which may be true, but as far as I'm concerned, your hub's title only needs two words: "Annoying Facebook."

    • Beata Stasak profile image

      Beata Stasak 4 years ago from Western Australia

      Great hub, had lots of laugh, congrat on your nomination:)

    • Angie Jardine profile image

      Angie Jardine 4 years ago from Cornwall, land of the eternally youthful mind ...

      Well done on winning the HubNugget thingy, Mandy!

      I’m one of those ‘Well, I only have FB to keep track of my daughter and her family abroad’ people … oh, and to air my HubPage offerings … how boring.

      I suspect there are quite a few ‘friends’ who hide my updates … : )

    • Mandy M S profile image
      Author

      Mandy M S 4 years ago

      Wanderer, I've had friend requests like that too, where I can't figure out who they are. Usually I can figure it out later though, after looking at all their pictures. :)

      idigwebsites - Yep, that's another one, GameJunkie. lol Those Farmville people are nuts!

      Jaye - Oh I find a lot of usefulness from facebook, but there is a serious overshare problem. I was taught not to air my dirty laundry in public and I try not to.

      Thanks Beata!

      Angie- Yep, I use facebook to see what's up with my teenage daughter and her friends, old friends from highschool or previous jobs, etc and relatives that live out of state.

      Thanks for Reading!!!!

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