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For the Single, Unmarried and free this is for you

Updated on December 2, 2010

The Story of Danaya, a Bachelorette

Danaya is definitely beautiful, people often wonder why at her age, she still has no special someone….one by one her brothers and sisters got married, some settled in USA, some in Singapore, Some in Cebu and some still in Manila living in their own houses. Danaya was left with thier parents. Years later, her mother died, after two years, her father followed. At the age of 40, Danaya lives all alone in her house…. again friends and relatives got worried, some advised her to go abroad, some arranged blind dates just for her to meet a possible prospect… Danaya goes on with her life

setting aside the pressure of being alone. One day, in a seminar she attended, she met Harry a 41 year old Bachelor, he said he remained single because his father died when his younger brothers were still in their grades school and 2 sisters in Highschool, taking all the responsibilities as the eldest, he promised his father not to get married unless his brothers and sisters are stable enough to live on their own. And everything became so easy, they both like each other instantly, and the meeting did not end at the the seminar, it continued on and on until they became intimate, until Harry proposed marriage…. A few months later, the couple got married, it was a simple and intimate ceremony attended by relatives and friends, who seemed to be very happy and thankful that Harry and Danaya found each other… And Danaya’s relatives and friends are very happy and satisfied, now they will not need to worry because Danaya is not alone anymore, and Harry is such a good man, every woman could dream of….

Their marriage is a blessed one, they can afford everything that they need though they live a simple life, they never fight seriously, they always talk as if they  have never seen each other for such a long time, it is indeed a happy life except for one, they are not bless to have a child.  Danaya now 42 can still bear a child, but many risks are involved, they attempted once but Danaya almost died of complications…. But in-spite of that, they remained happy together.  Too happy that they never thought of adopting a child.  Both are contented with their nieces and nephews though they see them only occasionally.

And their happy lives continues….After 15 years, Danaya at 57 is already a widow.. Harry died of Heart attack…. Danaya though still very sad, had no choice but to go on with her life…. and recalled the times when she was alone and managed it…. In her sadness her only comfort is her intimate communication with GOD, she asks  for his guidance in her solitude….

3 years later at 60, Danaya though still alone, is still very healthy and happy… friends and relatives often visit her.  She spends her time to her hobbies which are reading, writing stories, gardening, cooking and everything that can make her happy.  Friends and neighbors love her cookies and she was forced to sell some of it, because friends said her cookies can be a good source of income and are ideal gifts for christmas.  Danaya just hired a younger lady to do the household chores for her, the lady arrives in the morning and left at 7pm. Danaya does not mind to sleep all alone in her house.  She’s now adjusted to her life as a single or widow… She believes, she maybe is single again but she’s not totally alone….Her secret is her relationship with God, which made her feel confident and strong what ever it is that she may encounter

Human's fear of Solitude

I realized it when people were always surprised to know that I am living alone with my pets. Some gave me an impression that they can not survive it if they were in my situation and some can't help but suggest marriage, as if they are just telling me to finish my meal....

When my mother died, my relative wanted me to leave my house and just stay in their house so that I will have company, some even encouraged me to migrate to US so I can stay with them. Of course I am thankful for those people and love ones who worry about me, but leaving my life alone is not really as sad and as worst as what they thought it is... having my solitude is like having my freedom, my chance for self empowerment which I believe will soon attract a good vibe..

My dogs were never out of the issue, some said why don't I adopt a human because my dogs cannot take care of me when I get old, yes they just think of my welfare but, I can not take that outdated perpective.... adopting a child is to help the child to have a better life through me, I will never adopt to oblige someone to take care of me when I grow old.

Not because someone is alone she is unhappy... Happiness is something that a person can decide for himself not for someone who is just looking at him. Don't be sad for someone who does not possess the things that can make you happy because you are two different persons and what can make you happy may not be his or her choice of happiness

What the story is trying to convey

1.  We cannot escape solitude. And in case we are in that situation,there’s nothing  to fear about. It’s your decision to make your solitude happier and blessed by God

2.  Love chooses no age, no matter how late Mr. Right’s arrival is, it is never too late for marriage.

3.  Don’t let peer pressure influence you…it’s your life. Decide on your own. Pressure often comes with bad choices, not all available single men at 40s are a good catch (so Danaya is lucky).

4. Don’t get married for any other reasons but love..

5. Don’t  have children just to have company in your old age, remember, they have their own lives to live and it’s their choice to live with you or not.

6. We should aspire for eternal happiness, a kind that does not depend on another person, but only to yourself and to God.


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    • Maria Cecilia profile imageAUTHOR

      Maria Cecilia 

      8 years ago from Philippines

      Just recently officemates pushed me to get married as if they are just telling me to finish my meal.. sometimes I just can't understand them, how can they tell someone to get married when she is not in love with someone else or no one seems to tickle her fancy at the moment... as if marriage is everything in this world? I know marriage can be heaven but don't force someone who does not have someone LOL... which made me read this hub again

    • Maria Cecilia profile imageAUTHOR

      Maria Cecilia 

      10 years ago from Philippines

      Thanks Faisal for know most of the people around us are just worried that no ones going to take cvare for us when we get old. it seems like getting old alone is most feared by everyone. I guess we need to pray for ourselves, in my case I can't imagine myself getting married even out of love just to assure myself someone will take care of me when I get old... I am leaving everything to God

    • profile image


      10 years ago

      Such a beautiful post. I am single and gay at 29 years of age. I am from India and face pressure from the world to get married to a girl. I don't want to but then does it mean that I would die a solitary death helplessly alone at home with no wife/relative/children to care for..even if i have a gay partner..i wud prefer some1 of my age or elder to me..of course we both would grow old together..what then say when we both 3 75 to 80 y.o..

    • Maria Cecilia profile imageAUTHOR

      Maria Cecilia 

      10 years ago from Philippines

      Hi Sachel congrats.. if you have questions just ask... make your intro for yourself... sige I will follow you once you post your first hub..

    • Maria Cecilia profile imageAUTHOR

      Maria Cecilia 

      10 years ago from Philippines

      Sachel yes I will encourage you here at hubpages, I started here just like you, posting my comments to QSD hub of Febriedethan, I think i put a link on her hub in my other QSd related hub. I have no intention to join but then since I love to write, I thought that this is not a bad idea, and I can't believe I'll be this active here... just keep on posting ang tell me if you are here na

      About this topic yes when my someone arrives he will be just additional blessings from our God.. take care

    • profile image


      10 years ago

      Hi MC! I think I'm going to sign up on this site soon too. Only really, really positive people can become friends with solitude. And you are one of them. I also married a bit later than was usual. Got preoccupied with my career and in living the single life. I still miss it sometimes, especially when I am swamped with responsibilities. And yes I agree with you, never settle with just someone, its better to be alone and happy than be miserable with someone totally wrong for you. keep the faith!

    • Maria Cecilia profile imageAUTHOR

      Maria Cecilia 

      10 years ago from Philippines

      Your marriage is good because when you were enjoying your solitude, positive aura is in you, that is why the man of your dream arrived right on time.... I believe in saying that the more you want it the more you can't get it, so imagine those women who wanted to get married and yet can't seem to find the right one... pressure pressure... it's better not to look for one coz if God reserved someone for you he will surely arrive. thanks for visiting my hubs really appreciate it...

    • prairieprincess profile image

      Sharilee Swaity 

      10 years ago from Canada

      Maria, this is beautiful and so true. I totally understand how you can be alone with your dogs. I like being alone, too. Good for you for not giving in to the pressure.

      I was alone for many years, and now am married. My time alone was good, and now my marriage is good. There is a season for everything. Take care!


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