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The Good Wife Guide for a Happy Relationship

Updated on August 10, 2013

We all heard it in stories as children growing up "and they lived happy ever after". No one gets married with the intention of getting divorced. Yet few clearly understand what marriage is about. Typically, the attitude is I will get married to get my needs met, or I am looking for my other half. Marriage is about giving not taking. Typically, it is the ladies who are gun-ho about marriage and focus on attracting Mr Right, but what then? Once you have him how do you plan to keep him?

Once married, a couple settles into the day to day routine; it is easy to get caught up in work, bills etc. and not be as attentive to each other as you once were when you were dating. Speaking for the ladies, there are a few things we can do to keep him interested.

Communication

When making any significant household decisions, please talk it over with your husband. No man (or lady) likes surprises. Be honest and open with him. No man like a manipulating beauty queen for long. Listen to your husband when he is talking. If you find yourself in conflict please don't resort to name calling, hitting etc. A man's ego is fragile this could cause him to withdraw from you emotionally. Give respect to get respect in return.

A Friendly Greeting

There is a saying "do unto others as you would have them do unto you". Keeping this in mind, be attentive to how you greet your husband when he arrives home from work. Ladies, I realize many of you work, but please remember he has had a hard day too. Seeing your smiling face, while saying a pleasant hello dear can be uplifting to him. I am not saying be a door mat, just be aware of how you greet him when he returns from work.

Never Nag

This is one of the all time don't do items. Ladies I know we all have a list of things we want our men to do that is fine. There are ways to motivate him; nagging is not one of them. Please remember you married a grown man not a little boy; Nagging will only cause long term relationship problems.

A Man Needs His Space

Sometimes men need to spend time in his cave. This could be the den, garage or backyard. We ladies feel that because we want the comfort of others when we are angry or hurt or deep in thought our husbands want that too. Not so; when your husband is in his cave following an argument or a hard day at work please allow him to come out when he is ready. Also, please remember your husband had friends, family and hobbies before you two married. It is unrealistic to think you the wife are supposed to be the center of his attention at all times.

The Bedroom

Ladies, I realize many of you work and are tired at end of the day. Please remember a man has needs. If you are always tired, not in the mood or you always have a headache after a while he will began to withdraw from you emotionally. I am not saying he will go else where to get sex, but it is possible with some men. If you want a happy marriage, it is not good to over use the excuses.

 Men need praise and the approval of his wife. Tell him how much you love him. Make dinner for him. Rub his shoulders. Let him see you smile if not everyday day at least sometimes. If you married Mr. Right and he loves you in return, your relationship can be a wonderful thing.

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    • donnaisabella profile image

      Donaisabella 7 years ago from Fort Myers

      Thanks for sharing, you have a lot of wonderful points and truths. Be blessed.

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 7 years ago from Texas, USA

      donnaisabella - thank you once again and i look forward to reading more of your hubs

    • DeBorrah K. Ogans profile image

      DeBorrah K Ogans 7 years ago

      Coolmon2009, Very insighful hub! Wonderful points on ways to improve your marriage! Thank you for sharing, Blessings!

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 7 years ago from Texas, USA

      DeBorrah - Thank you for your feedback. I enjoyed reading your hub "ARE WE READY FOR MARRIAGE" looking forward to reading more hubs from you.

    • Frieda Babbley profile image

      Frieda Babbley 7 years ago from Saint Louis, MO

      Many women don't want to hear what have said here, but they should take it to heart, because everything is so right about what you say. All these things make a very big difference and you find that you get the same and often more in return. And no matter how bad your day is, that initial greeting with a smile and a hug or kiss lets him remember what home is.

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 7 years ago from Texas, USA

      @Frieda Babbley you are right. It is the greeting at the door that can set the stage for a good or bad evening. Thank you for your comments.

    • Steven King profile image

      Steven King 7 years ago

      Amazing Hub!

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 7 years ago from Texas, USA

      @Steven King - Thank you for your feedback

    • maribin profile image

      maribin 7 years ago from USA

      nice hub

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 7 years ago from Texas, USA

      @maribin - thank you for your comments

    • cristina327 profile image

      cristina327 7 years ago from Manila

      Great hub, full of wisdom. Thank you for sharing this. Happy New year to you.

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 7 years ago from Texas, USA

      @cristina327 - Thank you for your comments Hope you and yours have a happy New Year too

    • dyesebel10 profile image

      dyesebel10 7 years ago from USA

      Very nice hub.. it reflects your true heart and kindness.. thanks for all the tips.. very useful for everybody.

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 7 years ago from Texas, USA

      @dyesebel10 - Nice to here from you and thanks for the kind words :)

    • RedSelassie profile image

      Sharif Selassie 7 years ago

      Great hub--u hit on a lot of great points--I look forward to reading more of your work and feel free to peruse my work--See you around Hubpages--Bless.

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 7 years ago from Texas, USA

      @RedSelassie - Thank you for your comments; I look forward to reading some of your articles.

    • Dmrfam profile image

      Dmrfam 7 years ago from India

      Thanks for sharing your thoughts. They are very practical points which we miss doing in our day to day routine life. I like the way you have put across all the points..its in right perspective. Its true we get what we give.

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 7 years ago from Texas, USA

      @Dmrfam - Thank you for your feedback

    • Jane Grey profile image

      Ann Leavitt 7 years ago from Oregon

      Great advice! I will even go the extra mile with your final sentence, and say that an adoring and honoring wife will "make" her husband "Mr. Right." :)

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 7 years ago from Texas, USA

      @Jane Grey - I am glad you found the information useful, and thanks for leaving comments :)

    • SwiftlyClean profile image

      SwiftlyClean 6 years ago from Texas

      Great insights Coolmon2009!

      Same gose for nagging men they are some of them out there.I was once married to one.:)

      I enjoyed reading this very useful.

      Peace!

      Sharon Smith

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 6 years ago from Texas, USA

      @SwiftlyClean - So nice to hear from you again, and as always I enjoy reading your poetry :)

    • Micky Dee profile image

      Micky Dee 6 years ago

      God bless you Coolmon! "do unto others as you would have them do unto you"- It's the LAW! It's above all others and why not extend that especially to the spouse?!

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 6 years ago from Texas, USA

      @Micky Dee - Very well said, you are right that should be the basis of all relationships too. Nice to hear from you :)

    • Dr irum profile image

      Dr irum 6 years ago

      welldone coolmon ,your hub reflects so many truth with amazing tips for a good wife ,its really nice to read.Thanks dear.

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 6 years ago from Texas, USA

      @Dr irum - Glad you enjoyed my article, and thank you for leaving comments on this article.

    • geegee77 profile image

      geegee77 6 years ago from The Lone Star State!!

      Very well said, Ive been married for 25 years now and I once asked my husbands aunt who had beed married at the time for many years and I asked her what was her secret, because I never saw them fight or even argue. She said to me "dear we all have our disagreements but never, never lose respect for each other" like name calling, cursing. Because once you lose that you can really never get it back. And Ive stuck by that advice all my marriage, Im not saying I dont get angry sometimes but I never let it go so far. Thanks for your great advice. Great hub:) ge

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 6 years ago from Texas, USA

      @geegee77 - I agree with you once you loose respect and the communication is gone the lifeblood of the relationship is gone, Thanks for your feedback.

    • svetits profile image

      svetits 6 years ago from United Kingdom

      What a wonderful hub. Very informative, inspirational and straight to the point. Every married woman and all who intend to marry and have a blissful marriage should read this hub. You are an inspiration.

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 6 years ago from Texas, USA

      @svetits - I am glad you found this hub useful. Thank you for your comments.

    • katiem2 profile image

      katiem2 6 years ago from I'm outta here

      Great information we don't know till were taught and so many of us have not had good examples to learn by. Thanks for the helpful insight on how to be a good wife to your man.

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 6 years ago from Texas, USA

      @katiem2 - Thank you for your comments and its nice to hear from you again :)

    • Support Med. profile image

      Support Med. 6 years ago from Michigan

      This is excellent advice for those who are married and those who are not--may even help to get them married if they so desire. Voted and rated.

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 6 years ago from Texas, USA

      @Support Med. - Thanks for your comments. It is nice to hear from you once again :)

    • Thelma Alberts profile image

      Thelma Alberts 6 years ago from Germany

      You are right Coolmon2009. I´m married for 30 years so I know what you´re talking about. It is a good advice not only for the women but also to the men. VOTED UP!

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 6 years ago from Texas, USA

      @Thelma Alberts - Thank you, I am glad you found the information useful :)

    • Sun-Girl profile image

      Sun-Girl 5 years ago from Nigeria

      Good and well shared information which i agree with all you said and am pleading that our ladies should please learn this simple tips.

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 5 years ago from Texas, USA

      @Sun-Girl - Thanks for your feedback.

    • queen cleopatra profile image

      queen cleopatra 5 years ago

      My late grandma once told me that husbands straying away from marriage could sometimes be caused by women ignoring the importance of catering the manly needs... Now that I am married for 24 years, I would tell my husband about my womanly needs -- after taking care of his needs. And he seemed appreciative because he always comply. lol Thank you for letting me share here. :)

    • Coolmon2009 profile image
      Author

      Coolmon2009 5 years ago from Texas, USA

      @queen cleopatra - Thanks I am glad you found this article interesting and useful :)

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