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How To Be Chivalrous

Updated on August 20, 2011

If you're American, you probably think chivalry is dead. For the most part, I'd say that's close enough; American chivalry was one of the many casualties of radical feminism. On the other hand, if you live a bit further east, (say, central Europe) you'll find that chivalry is not yet dead.

Why such a marked difference in the evolution of women's rights?

It's simple, really. In their plight for equality, American femnazis equated being the recipient of chivalry with being an unequal doormat. European feminists do not often have these issues (though there are exceptions, to be sure) and they achieved equal rights without spitting in the faces of men who were simply trying to be courteous.

It's ok to be a feminist. It's not ok to be a femnazi.

Ms. Femnazi; If he holds a door open for you, he's just trying to show you some respect. Did you not spend the last few decades fighting for respect from men? Think about that, the next time you're getting ready to throw a temper tantrum. If you can't handle a simple act of courtesy, you've got bigger issues that have nothing to do with civil rights.

The following are five simple ways a man can be chivalrous with his woman. There are more -- far more -- but these are the basics, and most would agree they aren't the slightest bit offensive.

Jason Bourne
Jason Bourne

Jason Bourne was Chivalrous

Another chivalrous character, Jason Bourne only fought when he needed to, and only on equal terms. He respected Marie, and waited for her to make the first move, and even then he hesitated! It's no wonder this movie (and Matt Damon) did so well with women -- we love honorable, self-sacrificing men. Even if they're an assassin.

1. Hold the door open for her.

This should be a reflex, not something a man has to think long and hard about before doing. Sadly, it's more the latter these days. And I can't blame them for it. Not when femnazis would rather rip a man's head off for this act of courtesy, than simply smile and be grateful that someone thinks she's worth it.

2. Open the car door for her.

Same basic idea. If you're picking her up, open her car door. If you're picking her up and she's waiting for you at the curb when you pull up, you should still at least open it from the inside. You don't *need* to get out and open her door when dropping her off at home, but a clever man will do precisely that; you're more likely to get a goodnight kiss that way.

3. Help her onto the train/tram/etc.

There is something very sexy about a man who makes an effort to help a woman onto the tram. (Or whatever mode of transportation you're using.) It can be as simple as giving her a hand up, or it can be more intimate; try placing your hand in the small of her back and supporting her as she climbs the steps. It's really quite sexy.

4. Help her with her coat.

This is such a courteous thing to do. I love it when a man helps me with my coat. It's sexy, it's endearing, it says you care, and it provides an opportunity for physical contact. And, hello? Who doesn't want more of that?

5. Help her with her chair.

Pull her chair out and hold it while she sits down. It's really that simple. Nevertheless, this can prove awkward for some. If that's the case, at least wait until she's seated before you sit down yourself.

6. Help her if she's carrying something heavy.

I've yet to meet a woman who doesn't love the idea of a big strong man helping her with something. It makes us feel feminine, and most of us like feeling feminine. Unless we're talking femnazis, in which case she'll probably insist on carrying your bags around for you.


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