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How To Deal With Anger Problems

Updated on October 11, 2013

Learning how to deal with anger can be a struggle for some while there are others out there who never seem to get mad. You’ve seen those people before. They are extremely quiet and seem to keep all of their emotions inside them.

You on the other hand, lash out at any moment. If your friend said something that doesn’t agree with you, you suddenly become angry. Whenever your wife pays more attention to the cat, you start yelling because you feel like you are being left out. Your reasoning behind this is that if you don’t yell - people won’t hear you.

There’s no need to yell. Everyone can hear you but the question is - are they listening? They are more likely to listen when you aren’t as angry so toning it down will definitely allow you to come to a solution.

Of course, there is also silent anger too. This is where you become mad at someone or something and do not talk about it. The problem with this is that you can make yourself incredibly sick by not saying anything and it can also cause ulcers.

How to control your anger

Controlling anger in the heat of the moment is easier said than done. You might be upset because your brother snitched on you to your parents. You just wish he would keep his mouth shut. Now the two of you are both yelling at each other. Instead of escalating in a fight, here are a few things you can do to help with anger problems:

Walk it out

That’s right - have a walk. Even if it is just for a short while, it will make you feel alot better about yourself. By the time you get back home, you will be calm enough to talk to someone or at least stop being mad about things that are going on in your life.


Count up to twenty in a calm manner. Close your eyes if you have to. I tend to feel much better after doing this. The whole idea of counting is to give yourself a timeout so you don’t lash out.

Listen to music

When you are angry, listen to a song that is soothing. It can be a “slow dance” type of song or even music that makes you happy.

Watch funny videos

If you want to really calm down, watching a funny video will definitely help you. Try watching “Just For Laughs” on Youtube. This will cheer up anyone!

Read a book

The reason why books work so well for people that have built up anger is because it takes their mind off their problems whenever they are reading a book.

Anger management tips

If you are looking for tips that can help prevent your outbursts, there are a couple things that you can do. Read below for more information:

Meditate as often as possible

Meditation can easily put you into another dimension and allow you to concentrate on your mind, body, and spirit instead of small problems going on in your life. You will also be able to get in touch with your “third eye” which will really calm you down.

Don’t think of your issues

Any problems or issues going on might be hard to ignore but one way you can ignore them is by becoming invested in your work. Also, you can pay more attention to the kids and play with them more often. Kids can make anyone happy.

Talk with friends

Talking about your problems with friends and getting useful advice can really help. If you are upset and extremely stressed, pick up the phone and call a friend. They will always be there for you.

The Anger Poll

How often do you get angry?

See results

Anger management exercises

One of the best ways to control your outbursts is with anger management exercises. These exercises can make your anger meter go from 10 to 0 in a small amount of time.. Once you start practicing these exercises, you’ll notice a big difference.

  • Sit in a quiet area on a soft chair. Tilting your head back, close your eyes while breathing very slowly and deeply.

  • Visualize someone that calms you. This could be your husband, mother, sister or someone you dearly love.

  • Remember back on your life during the happy times. What was one of the most happiest times of your life.

  • Keep up your breathing exercises while doing this. It will definitely help

Other ways to control your anger

If you are in need of desperate help and nothing seems to work, you’ll need the help of a psychiatrist. They are able to prescribe medication for those who have mental issues, anger, and extreme stress. You may be experiencing other “symptoms” that go along with anger such as high stress levels. Seek out help immediately. For now, here are a few other ways you can control anger:

Admit you have a problem

Being in denial won’t get you anywhere when it comes to anger. Let a friend or family know that you have this problem and need help. They will be happy to help you since they are probably frightened of being around you when you are angry.

Write your feelings down

A journal would work perfectly for preventing anger. It’s much like talking to someone and whenever you are angry, you can “talk” to your journal. Go ahead and review it at the end of the month to see what are the main reasons that trigger your anger.

Join anger management groups

By joining other people who get angry easily, you can relate to these people and all of you can work together to get rid of anger. With a group, people can discuss times they get angry and what has worked for them.

How to control your anger


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    • The Examiner-1 profile image

      The Examiner-1 4 years ago

      Usually the easiest bugs to crush are the roaches and the hardest are the fruit flies because they are fast. House flies I can often catch in mid air. :-)

      When I said 'problems' I should have made it more clear. I meant problems mainly on paper.

    • webdesignsbyapw profile image

      webdesignsbyapw 4 years ago from Petaluma, CA

      I bet you crush the bugs when you're mad, huh? =)

      Anyways, yeah - I always get mad for unresolved problems... especially relationship problems with either family or my spouse.

    • The Examiner-1 profile image

      The Examiner-1 4 years ago

      Hi, I voted this Hub as interesting. I almost took the poll except there were no answers even close to what I would have said. I usually only get mad at the bugs inside the house and it depends how often they appear plus whether or not I catch them, etc. One other thing which I get mad at is if I cannot solve a problem. For that one I calm right down so that I can solve it.