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Easy Way To Find A Girlfriend

Updated on December 6, 2013

Not everyone uses online dating sites. They are great ways to find someone but many women are on the computer all day for work and when they get home the last thing they want to do is get online to find a date. Also it can be a bit intimidating talking to strangers not knowing what kind of person they may be. Ladies can’t be too careful.

Singles bars are sometimes a fun place to hang out but you can also get women with issues like drinking problems or STD’s. I’m not saying all girls in bars are diseased alcoholics but your chances of finding one are much higher in these places.

Women are everywhere you just have to approach them. I know that is hard for some men but with practice you get better at it. The word "no" doesn’t hurt, get used to it.

Women are very different than men, in case you haven’t noticed, not only in looks, but also in behavior.

First I’m going to list some places you are most apt to find women.

Shopping Centers

I know some of you guys are allergic to that four-letter word, “shop,” but in case you haven’t noticed, it’s where the ladies are.

Most women love to shop although not all of us. Some women only want to get in, get what they need and go home.

If you are looking for a frugal woman look at thrift stores or flea markets, if you want one with fashion savvy look in high-end department stores. I hear Target is a great place to find women of all walks of life.

Malls are great places to pick up women because they are on a shopper’s high especially if they have a few bags on their arm. Do not offer to carry her bags. She doesn’t know you and for all she knows you may just be trying to steal her treasures.

The first of the month and the fifteenth are payday for most people so those days and the weekend right after are going to be the busiest shopping days. There will be more women out shopping but it will also be the most crowded especially if a holiday is coming up.

Grocery Store

Everyone has to eat and at some time we all have to purchase food even if it is convenience items that we only put in the microwave. Ask a woman where something is, after she tells you; mention you are always so lost in the market or something conversational about yourself pertaining to shopping or the store in general. One thing may lead to another and you may make a connection. If she seems receptive ask for her phone number.

Craft Stores and Craft Shows

These women are either into making things or they just enjoy buying handmade items. If you are into women that knit, check out the yarn department, if you like women who make jewelry check out the bead aisle. If you don’t care just hang around until you see one you like.


Most women don’t attend these alone but sometimes they do. Try to talk to her when she isn’t with her friend(s). This makes it easier for the both of you. Make small talk about the entertainment, the weather or just whatever you think of. Sometimes you get lucky and your seat is right next to a potential date.

Groups and Organizations

There is a club for just about anything you can think of and this is a good place to meet all kinds of people. Runners club, writer’s organizations or bird watching; you name it and there is a club that meets to talk about it. Whatever you are interested in if you join a group you have a good chance of meeting women. Mingle, introduce yourself and make friends.

Volunteer Work

The United Way and other organizations often have school supply drives, food drives, or other activities going on when they need volunteers. The holidays like Christmas, end of summer (back to school), Autumn (Thanksgiving) and Easter are big times when they are looking for extra people but they need help year round.


Women aren’t always willing to talk to men here due to not being their best: sweaty and no make-up, but you can still meet them. If you go on a regular basis and see someone often she will be comfortable and more apt to talk to you. The plus side is if you are willing to ask her out at her worst you might be worth a chance.


People think of this as a female dominant exercise but men join too, only not as frequently as women so you won’t have much competition. Many will let you pay for one or two classes to see how you like it before committing to several sessions. There are varying levels so you can start out with an easier set and work your way up.

Dance Lessons

You can join even if you don’t have a partner; in fact many women join alone so you will have a pick of potential partners. Whatever kind of music you like there is a dance to go along with it and lessons to sign up for. Ask the median age of the students before joining if you are a young man looking for younger women. Some classes may have mostly older ladies.

Bookstores and Libraries

There was a time when the library was only for reading books but with the Internet and movies on tape or disc people go there for all sorts of reasons including using the Wi-Fi.

Temples, Churches and Mosques

If you are part of a religious group try looking into singles meetings or other activities they have. It’s a good opportunity to meet all kinds of people.


Many people walk, jog or take their pets for outdoor fun. This can be a good place to meet a girl just be cautious of personal space rules and make small talk about the community the park or weather. Women tend to be more cautious at parks due to crime but if you are out in the open during the day with plenty of people around she may open up and talk to you.


Whether it’s for your job, a hobby or local function, a conference can be a great place to meet people. Many organizations, clubs and places of employment put these on at hotels and convention centers.


Personal Space

If she is showing signs of being uncomfortable step back and see if her body language relaxes. If she is responding to you, smiles a lot, plays with her hair or talks, you can move in a bit more but don’t get too close too fast.

If you try to talk to her and she seems irritated or disinterested move on. It may not be anything you’ve done personally. She may be in a relationship, not interested in you, just got out of a bad relationship and mad at all men or she could be a lesbian. Females are moody creatures so you can’t always tell. You can approach the same woman a day or week later and get a different response depending on what is going on in her life.

Body Language

This is a big thing to watch. If you aren’t familiar with body language you might want to pick up a book on the subject and study it. When a woman is interested in a man she will mess with her hair, smile, make eye contact and sometimes their voices go up a pitch. All women are different so it’s not always easy to tell. Some women just have a habit of messing with their hair so watch her before you approach to see the changes. The younger they are the more they flip their hair; mature women tend to pat theirs.

Eye Contact

If she makes prolonged eye contact she is interested. Women will avoid a man's eyes if she is trying to give you the brush off but if she looks into your eyes for more than a few seconds she may be interested.

Don’t stare at her breasts

I know many of the styles today put a woman’s bosom on display what with push up bras and low cleavage but make an effort to not focus on her chest. Make eye contact at least part of the time even if you are shy.

Look For a Ring

Most married women will wear a wedding ring. In this day of unusual engagement bands it isn’t always easy to tell but if she has a ring that remotely looks like a wedding ring on her left ring finger, move on.

What to say

You can ask her a question. Most women are good at talking so if you ask her a question or make a comment she will probably open up and get the conversation rolling unless she’s not interested.

What to Talk About

Sometimes just sitting next to a woman and talking about anything that is going on can help you get to know her. Some of the best marriages and relationships started with friendship and blossomed from there.

I’ve heard it mentioned that if you become her friend she won’t see you as date potential but that isn’t necessarily true. She may be having fantasies of taking your relationship to the next level and just too shy to make a move or waiting for you to do it.

Rethink Your Standards

Not all guys, but many, have this idea of what the perfect woman looks like and won’t deviate from that idea. Look around and you will see most women do not look like the girls you see in centerfolds or advertising lingerie. Most of those models have had thousands of dollars worth of work done to look that way.

While I understand you would like to look good in the eyes of your peers and having a gorgeous significant other on your arm may do that, but your friends will also be trying to steal her at every turn.

So… finding a mediocre looking lady might be a better idea especially if you aren’t doing so well in the dating department.

There is a movie called, “A Beautiful Mind,” where a man does an experiment on finding a girlfriend. It works and makes perfect sense if you understand the female brain. None of us want to feel like we are second or last choice.

There’s an old saying, “If you want to have a happy life, don’t marry a pretty wife.”

There are a lot of lonely people out there: male and female. Wouldn’t it be great if we could pair them all together?


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    • Pamela N Red profile imageAUTHOR

      Pamela N Red 

      6 years ago from Oklahoma

      If she seems demanding or pushy move on. Take your time and don't move too fast in a relationship. You don't want to commit before knowing her true self.

    • Darkproxy profile image


      6 years ago from Ohio

      Well my only concern is how do I know I'm not getting a ticking time bomb woman? Do you have any tips specifically for the men who have been abused by women for most of their early life?

    • Pamela N Red profile imageAUTHOR

      Pamela N Red 

      7 years ago from Oklahoma

      Thanks for reading, Cogerson.

      Chatkath, there are many people looking for someone these days so I thought I'd write articles helping them out. Hopefully I succeeded.

    • Chatkath profile image


      7 years ago from California

      Good idea for a hub Pamela! Certainly not a lack of interest in this subject!

    • Cogerson profile image


      7 years ago from Virginia

      Great hub with some great advice....and nice companion piece to you How to Get a Boyfriend hub....voted up and useful

    • Pamela N Red profile imageAUTHOR

      Pamela N Red 

      7 years ago from Oklahoma

      Solar Awareness, I hope I gave some ideas some might not have thought of. Thanks for reading.

    • profile image

      Solar Awareness 

      7 years ago

      Excellent article - you described many resources that people may have not given any consideration. I appreciated your paragraph on "rethinking your standards" as too many guys look for the "trophy' or eye-candy mate so as to make an impression with their peers and thus fell better about themselves.

    • Pamela N Red profile imageAUTHOR

      Pamela N Red 

      7 years ago from Oklahoma

      Kori and Rob, thanks for reading.

      Daoglund, I hadn't thought of that but you are right. We can find fiction writing ideas in many places.

    • dahoglund profile image

      Don A. Hoglund 

      7 years ago from Wisconsin Rapids

      Advice I could have used when I was young. It is also useful for us who delve into a bit of fiction writing to describe characters and relationships.

    • Robwrite profile image


      7 years ago from Oviedo, FL

      Useful advice, thanks.


    • kori howard profile image

      kori howard 

      7 years ago from apartment

      that good thank.

    • Pamela N Red profile imageAUTHOR

      Pamela N Red 

      7 years ago from Oklahoma

      Thanks, Mary Ann.

    • profile image

      THAT Mary Ann 

      7 years ago

      Well done!

    • Pamela N Red profile imageAUTHOR

      Pamela N Red 

      7 years ago from Oklahoma

      Thanks for reading, J.S. I hope it helps someone.

    • J.S.Matthew profile image

      JS Matthew 

      7 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Great advice! You didn't spare anything! Nice job. Up and Useful!



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