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Long Distance Relationship Tips

Updated on February 28, 2013
debbiepinkston profile image

Debbie is a licensed counselor in the state of Arkansas. She lived in Venezuela and worked with a local orphanage there for many years.

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So Far Away...But Still Close

Today more and more couples find themselves in a long distance relationship, something that isn't new but seems to be more common now. The reasons for being in such a relationship are many: Some couples meet online and live in different geographical locations, until one of them decides to move to be closer. Military personnel are often in a long distance relationship while one of the spouses is deployed. The stress of deployment and of being separated from the spouse and children is a difficult thing to handle. Other couples find themselves in a long distance relationship because one of the partners found employment in another state or another country.

Some people aren't cut out for a long distance relationship and have a hard time maintaining a healthy, strong relationship when they aren't able to be physically present. There may be insecurities that grow stronger while apart, and the spouses' presence is desperately needed to calm the anxieties. Unfaithfulness is a major concern for many when they are away from their partner. For some, physical (sexual) needs are so strong that the relationship can't survive from a distance. Others have a strong need to depend on their partner daily and a long distance relationship doesn't allow that dependence.


There are several things that can help a long distance relationship stay strong:

-Realize that this kind of relationship is unique and requires extra effort to stay connected.

-Make time every day to communicate with your loved one, preferably at a regular time of day. My husband and I talk or chat most days around late afternoon/early evening.

-Use Skype to have "date nights", where you eat dinner "together", listen to music together or even watch a movie together.

-Send daily emails, text messages or voice messages to let your partner know that you're thinking about them throughout the day.

-When you're doing something fun or interesting, have a friend snap a photo with your smartphone and send it to your sweety. He/she will appreciate the fact that you wanted to share that moment with them and they will feel that they are a part of it.

-Actively plan your next trip to see each other and count down the days. When I'm headed back to the U.S. and I'm going to be away from my husband, I go ahead and purchase my airline ticket for my next trip to see him. This makes the "goodbyes" easier, knowing that I already have the next trip scheduled.

-Don't sit around feeling bad. Get busy with your life, and time will fly. Before you know it, it will be time to be together again and you'll be in each others' arms.

Some of the advantages of long distance relationships are: While apart, each person can enjoy a certain level of independence, while knowing that someone far away cares for them. They never get tired of each other and are always happy to be together. Every day together is a good day and is not taken for granted. It's a gift!

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    • debbiepinkston profile imageAUTHOR

      Debbie Pinkston 

      5 years ago from Pereira, Colombia and NW Arkansas

      Mercury, you made an interesting point. This advice can apply to good friends as well as couples. There are so many ways to stay connected, which is what relationships are all about.

      Thanks for stopping by and for adding your comment!

    • MercuryNewsOnline profile image

      MercuryNewsOnline 

      5 years ago from Toronto, Canada

      Interesting topic to read. The advice and suggestions are very useful for the modern day couples or best friends.

    • Kenja profile image

      Ken Taub 

      5 years ago from Long Island, NY

      Nice tipping. Smart ideas for staying touch. best, Ken

    • debbiepinkston profile imageAUTHOR

      Debbie Pinkston 

      5 years ago from Pereira, Colombia and NW Arkansas

      True! Thank God for Skype!

    • teaches12345 profile image

      Dianna Mendez 

      5 years ago

      I think your suggestions will help keep the relationships going well. With today's tech gadgets, it is much easier to keep in touch and it's almost like being there together.

    • debbiepinkston profile imageAUTHOR

      Debbie Pinkston 

      5 years ago from Pereira, Colombia and NW Arkansas

      Mellony, long-distance relationships are usually temporary, with the hope of someday being able to live in the same place. There are however relationships that are together part of the time, but apart for several weeks or months, and this is a permanent arrangement agreed upon by both parties.

    • Mellonyy profile image

      Mellonyy 

      5 years ago

      Great tips here , but don't you think long-distance relationship is a temporary state ? Voted up!

    • debbiepinkston profile imageAUTHOR

      Debbie Pinkston 

      5 years ago from Pereira, Colombia and NW Arkansas

      Daylee, it definitely takes great communication skills and commitment! Thanks for stopping by.

    • DayLeeWriter profile image

      Debra Cornelius 

      5 years ago from Georgia

      Strange but true that many long distance relationships are closer due to open communication than some where partners spend hours on end under the same room yet not communicating! Great info thanks for sharing!!!!

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