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How To Know if He's a Great Guy or Just Another Heartache

Updated on March 3, 2010

Learn All About Him ...

It's not necessary to date a guy for six months, or marry him and then find out he's a badass and not what you were hoping to get! From the moment you meet a guy, there are clues that let you know who and what he really is! For instance, a man's actions portray volumes about his true self, like how he acts when he's not aware you're watching. A man's character and personality traits are out there on center stage, if you take the time to look.

Find out what kind of guy you're dating before getting involved or hurt. The following can be signs, cautions, or a green light about men:

Sports: Different sports enthusiasts tend to have different characteristics.

Runners and swimmers love their independence and don't mind spending a lot of time alone. If he is a fan of team sports, like football, baseball, and basketball he'll like to hangout with his friends. If he's not into sports at all, most likely he's an independent thinker, sensitive, and passionate.

His Friends: If a guys friends haven't changed since his grade school days, gotta give him points for loyalty. But, if you don't like what you see don't expect him to like change. On the other hand, if your guy has friends from many areas of his life, he'll have no problems with changes and new situations, or meeting new people.

Credit Cards versus Hamiltons: A guy that thrives on status symbols might be ambitious and confident, and likes to conquer his conquests. But, if he prefers to pay in cash, he's most likely self-sufficient and independent, which might make him difficult to corner. If the guy's wallet is empty, don't throw caution to the wind because he just might be dependent and looks for others to take care of him.

Communication: Does the guy send an email rather then call you? This can be a signal that he chooses to 'edit' what he says and might not want to show his true self. If he bombards you with instant messages (Ims), he'll crave nonstop attention and instant assurance that you're always available to him. Guys that are prone to calling you on the phone (imagine this), might seem to be old-fashioned. But, probably he likes to do things by the book and is not afraid of intimacy.

Clothes-Horse: If an old t-shirt and faded jeans appeal more to him than that slinky black cocktail dress, he's a laid-back guy that likes low-maintenance chicks. A guy attracted to women looking more like painted dolls in designer labels craves prestige. He might bring in the bucks, but money might be the only important thing in his life. If the guy loves having a sexy, no opinion, bombshell wrapped around his arm, he's looking for a boost to his ego. His values will be placed on the amount of admiration and envy he perceives.

Party Person or Party Scene: He might be a hunk, but if he can't party with his friends, don't expect any great romantic gestures or mind-blowing sex. He's probably uptight and self-conscious, and in his own shell. But, if he's fun to hang out with, but demands constant attention and TLC, don't expect to get your needs filled. He loves being in the lime-light, and would rather focus on his image and admiration, he'll have little desire to be alone with you.

Courtesy or Road Rage: If your guy tailgates, flips off other drivers, weaves in and out of traffic, you can take it to the bank that he's got an aggression problem. Dealing with an argumentative guy in a relationship is difficult. However, if he remains calm and “human” when getting stuck in a traffic jam, he's likely to have great self-control and consideration.

Man in Heat: Does he jump your bones everytime he gets a boner? If so, he's confident in the attraction portion of the relationship, but this could also be a caution sign that you're being taken for granted and might represent no more than a booty call. Some guys are more conservative and prefer wait for you to flash the green light for him to make his move. This type of guy is likely an eager-to-please type, or protecting a wounded ego from a past experience.

Sex by Schedule: If your guy is “up” with the crack of dawn, he's probably spontaneous. His high energy might make him a blast to be with, but his need for instant gratification can grate on the nerves! If the guy prefers nighttime sex, he's probably a romantic but a bit tame. However, this type of guy often is ready for long, tantalizing sensual in-the-sack playtimes.

What's on his Plate? If the guy is a meat-and-potatoes kind of guy, he's usually down to earth and dependable. However, he's probably unadventurous and doesn't like non-traditional sex activities or positions. But, if he goes for exotic dishes, he's probably loves spontaneous experiences and easily gets bored with the same ole same ole.

Neat or Nasty: If a guy finds it necessary to color-code and line up his socks in his drawer, this guy is not gonna be a lot of fun. If he's a bit messy but still puts his socks in the hamper, he's more open-minded. But, if the inside of his shower has never seen a scrub brush, he's just plain lazy! Are you really brave enough to see his sheets?

Favorite Flicks: If he watches one sitcom after another, he'll mostly use humor to defuse stress. This might be a good thing, as he won't hold a grudge or lose his cool. But, it's tough to get this kind of person involved in a serious conversation, and he'll become more evasive the harder you try. A couch-potato finds CSI-type shows fascinating, but will usually be thoughtful and analytical. This guy prides himself on is ability to solve problems, and will be there if you need support.

What's Under it All: A guy who wears tight-fitting white underware is proud of his package and the way he uses it. The tighter the underwear, the more eager he'll be to show off his sexual skills, but he'll be less interested in your needs. Men who prefer boxers and boxer briefs might be less impressive in bed, but most are more willing to focus on you. If he's a commando-type of guy, no doubt he's a free spirit and comfortable with his body.

He's Got A Big Head (Hair, that is): Basically, the more hair a man has, the bigger his confidence. But, he may be limited on sensitivity and expect to be admired, not criticized. But, if the guy's hair is showing signs of thinning, most likely his ego is a bit deflated, too. But, he's probably more empathetic.

Move Over, I'll Drive: A guy who doesn't assume driving rights is likely to share the relationship steering. A guy who hogs the wheel, even in your car, is old-fashioned at best, but could be a complete control freak.


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    • ivori profile image

      Barbara Eisenberg 8 years ago from Titusville

      lol, Chris, but then I don't think I'd pass all those 'ideals' either!

    • ivori profile image

      Barbara Eisenberg 8 years ago from Titusville

      Thank you, Faye. Lots of advice, but no foolproof guarantees! lol

    • carolina muscle profile image

      carolina muscle 8 years ago from Charlotte, North Carolina

      Haha... well, I don't stack up too good here. LOL

    • creativeone59 profile image

      benny Faye Douglass 8 years ago from Gold Canyon, Arizona

      Thank you ivori, for a great hub with fantastic adivce. Godspeed. creativeone59