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How To Tell If He Loves You: Read The Signs

Updated on November 30, 2016
Cardisa profile image

Carolee is a passionate writer with a love for learning and teaching. She is a published author, poet, blogger, and content creator.

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Women have instincts, and so long as we use those instincts we can usually tell when something is off or on. With practice we can usually spot when a guy is faking it, lying, cheating and just plain dumb.

If you are in a relationship and your instincts have not been fully developed or you are confused because your instincts tell you one thing and your spouse is acting in other ways, here are some sure signs that he loves you.

A relationship is built on more than just mouth talk or sex so exclude those from the list and take notes. When a man loves you his actions will tell you so here goes.


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The signs

  1. One of the first signs that a guy really cares for you is when he wants to be with you all the time. Not too clingy or jealous, but love spending time with you and he does not find excuses to stay away. It your man is always making excuses to break a date than make an excuse and dump him.
  2. Some men are kind so you have to be careful with this one but if your man offers to fix your problem instead of waiting for you to ask then you are in the company of someone who is caring. Some guys like to rescue people so you must note whether or not he is like that with everyone else or just you.
  3. A man who loves you will be unhappy when you are unhappy. He will do everything in his power to make you feel better. Some men stay away when you are facing rough times, claiming that they are giving you some space, or that they are busy. But if he loves you he will not go far even if you send him away. He will be waiting for you to call him back.
  4. He will not wait for two or three days to call you after a date. If he loves you, you will be on his mind so he will call you. A guy who is willing to spend hours on the phone talking to you when he could be in bed might be a guy worth giving a try.
  5. When a man loves you he will not want to keep his relationship a secret. If he doesn't want to date you publicly then beware of another woman or maybe he just wants sex.
  6. He will want you to meet his family. A sure sign that he is ready to commit is when he introduces you to his parents or children. If he keeps making excuses not to meet the family be wary. Don't rush him though because he could just be nervous.
  7. When the man asks you to move in with no prior hints from you. This is one sign that he is ready to commit to you.
  8. If after spending the night at your place he wants to stick around and maybe find it hard to leave then maybe you have a guy who is falling in love. The fact that he spent the entire night might also be a sign that he is falling for you.
  9. If he doesn't find excuses to take you to his place. If he is always coming to your place and keeps coming up with excuses why you can't come over to his place then maybe he has something to hide.
  10. A guy telling you he loves you doesn't mean much if he can't express it in certain ways. You the woman have to look for signs of expression such as, him wanting to touch you. He will want to hold your hands in public, he will kiss away ice cream dripping from the corner of your mouth, brush the hair out of your face, look into your eyes when you talk. All his body language will be geared towards you.

Couples who live together

Living together is no guarantee that you are in love. A man will move in with a woman for convenience but when the man asks the woman to move in with him then he wants to be with her.

  1. In addition to the points above, your spouse will do everything he can to make sure of the security of the family. He will work hard at providing and not just give up when the going gets tough.
  2. When you are both in financial trouble he stands by you and not flake out. He will make sure you are still happy by finding ways to make you laugh. He will not ignore your misery.
  3. When there is a crisis he will be strong for both of you and not run and hide or drink his misery away.
  4. He will not take his misery out on you as he realizes that you too are miserable.
  5. He still wants to have sex everyday after three years of living together
  6. He doesn't ask for alone time or space. Sometime you have to chase him out of the house to go out by himself or with friends.
  7. He still finds you sexy or beautiful after many years
  8. He still buys you little inexpensive gifts for no reason, just to make you happy.
  9. He keeps bringing up marriage even if you don't.
  10. He comes straight home from work even if you had a quarrel that morning.


Knowing if a man loves you isn't hard you just have to read the signs. Usually there is more than one sign to read so look out for them.

Sometimes the signs will just hit you and when you realize that only someone in love will do that, you will smile and feel reassured that your relationship is secure.

If you are always wondering if he loves you and you have to ask him outright, than take it as a sign that maybe he doesn't. A man in love will show it in some ways even if he is shy or reserved, you will see it, trust me.

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    • schoolgirlforreal profile image

      schoolgirlforreal 

      6 years ago

      Thanks Cardisa. I appreciate you trying to help. :)

    • Cardisa profile imageAUTHOR

      Carolee Samuda 

      6 years ago from Jamaica

      Schoolgirl, I do hope this man has changed because you deserve the love of a good man. I hope there is a second chance there as it's clear that you still love him.

    • schoolgirlforreal profile image

      schoolgirlforreal 

      6 years ago

      Cardisa,

      Yes he was definitely insecure which is a shame. I did love him but he didn't let me love him completely. I didn't know who he really was, he even told me he was only telling me what he thought I needed to know, therefore I never trusted him completely. Since trust and communication were lacking and honesty, it led to the relationship falling apart. I wanted to love him more but he didn't let me in especially when he got sick, he shut me out, it was so painful that it was the reason I broke up with him. Maybe he'll do it right the next time if there is a second time for us. There are other factors also involved in which he was much much older and had a huge advantage age wise and I wasn't emotionally or mentally ready to handle it all. He certainly was not an "ordinary man" which is what is/was most intoxicating above all. I only hope he can fix some of these things; I don't like how much we argued, how angry he got, and the communication wasn't clear. I know I needed to mature and grow too.

    • schoolgirlforreal profile image

      schoolgirlforreal 

      6 years ago

      Good advice. Nice ladies, good stuff :)

    • Cardisa profile imageAUTHOR

      Carolee Samuda 

      6 years ago from Jamaica

      Hey Kelly, yes number 5 works for my man as well....lol...How could your husband not give an order like that with a beautiful wife who can cook! Irresistible!

    • Cardisa profile imageAUTHOR

      Carolee Samuda 

      6 years ago from Jamaica

      Hi Schoolgirl, he may have been controlling because he was insecure. Maybe he thought you didn't love him. But be careful, he could have changed too so take it one step at a time and see how it goes. I love the new profile as well.

    • RealHousewife profile image

      Kelly Umphenour 

      6 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      Hi gorgeous! I saw this - and have to have a look. My husband is still sleeping and I wonder if hes still dreaming about me:) LOL.

      I think you have a terrific list - and great points. If I'm upset my husband will not rest until I am appeased! Lol. I was at an office party and one of the receptionists came up and told me that all the girls had their orders that if I called - didn't matter what my husband was doing they were to get up and go find him! Hahahaha. That's my man!

      And that number 5 - uh huh...I've been living with my husband for 20 years this year....nothing gets old to him! Hahahaha

    • schoolgirlforreal profile image

      schoolgirlforreal 

      6 years ago

      This is a nice hub, Cardisa, I love the new hubpage profiles and features, it makes it so much easier to learn.

      I had a man who loved me, but who sort of controlled me so I'm not sure if it was healthy. We fought a lot but I think I have changed. I still don't know but I want him back. Getting him back is tough though so I'm dating other people. But I feel in my heart we are to be together. I hope he understands but I'm still wondering about it all.

      Thanks for the great hub, many of these signs he showed. It's good to get some practical advice, voted Awesome !

    • Cardisa profile imageAUTHOR

      Carolee Samuda 

      6 years ago from Jamaica

      Thank you Ebonny, I too sometimes get insecure, but as my relationship mature I realize more and more how much he loves me. Thanks for stopping by, have a great day.

    • Ebonny profile image

      Ebonny 

      6 years ago from UK

      It would be useful to keep this list on hand for those moments of insecurity which most of us have from time to time. Voted up and interesting with thanks.

    • Cardisa profile imageAUTHOR

      Carolee Samuda 

      6 years ago from Jamaica

      Hi Epi, yes it is obvious.

    • epigramman profile image

      epigramman 

      6 years ago

      Isn't it obvious Carolee?

      lake erie time 12:27pm ........ and the whole world tastes better with Blue Mountain coffee .....

    • Cardisa profile imageAUTHOR

      Carolee Samuda 

      6 years ago from Jamaica

      Hey Ruby, Iwish Whitney had followed her instincts earlier, it would have saved her a lot of pain. Honestly, I wasn't too happy when she married Bobby but I couldn't do anything about that.

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Richert 

      6 years ago from Southern Illinois

      You are soo right. Thank you. Been there, done that. I miss Whitney. She had her share of pain...

    • Cardisa profile imageAUTHOR

      Carolee Samuda 

      6 years ago from Jamaica

      Hey James, will try for the men as well...lol. Thank you so much for visiting, I really miss my friend. Whitney is beautiful, I wish I could sing like her.

    • SubRon7 profile image

      James W. Nelson 

      6 years ago from eastern North Dakota

      Beautiful hub, Carolee! And I have loved the beautiful Whitney since her beginning. A long time ago I went to a flea market (as a dealer) and picked up the local paper, and there she was, on an entire page. And I still have the article.

      Now, about your hub: I don't know that I agree with everything, but most of it. So, now how about one for how us guys can tell....

    • Cardisa profile imageAUTHOR

      Carolee Samuda 

      6 years ago from Jamaica

      Attikos, thank you. You have just given me an idea for my next hub...lol.

      I have to agree with you on that, however and woman want to be sure the man loves her before she can begin to relax, especially if she has had bad experiences or comes from a broken home. Never the less, she needs to relax and trust him and let nature take its course.

      Have a wonderful day!

    • Attikos profile image

      Attikos 

      6 years ago from East Cackalacky

      In my own experience, most women are so far into doubting, questioning and testing their relationships they kill them as you would a frog you were examining in biology class. It's the rare gem of a woman who can go with the flow and trust a man as much as he trusts her.

    • Cardisa profile imageAUTHOR

      Carolee Samuda 

      6 years ago from Jamaica

      Hey Reynold, thank you. It took me about an hour to put the hub together including finding photos, video and coming up with each point. I think since I live with some that I do have some idea of what I am talking about and used my own relationship as point of reference. Thanks for the vote. have a great day!

    • Reynold Jay profile image

      Reynold Jay 

      6 years ago from Saginaw, Michigan

      Iw as going to try to pick my favorite item from your list, but it bacame too big a task as each and everyone is a true sign. Well done and it must have took some time to figure it all out like this. I enjoyed this very much. You have this laid out beautifully and it is easy to understand. Keep up the great HUBS. I gotta give this an Up ONE AND BEAUTIFUL. I'm now your fan!

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