How to Deal With Conflict Between Loved Ones in Your Family
Family squabbles are the worst. If you have a fairly large family, you know how quickly these little riffs can escalate into major, all-out family feuds. There is usually one diplomatic person in every family. That person always receives the blunt of family conflict, too. If you have found yourself caught in the middle of conflict between family members, here are a few tips that might help you deal with this problem.
Don’t choose sides.
The worst possible thing you could do is pick a side to agree with. This will only lead to more conflict and fighting in your family.
Instead, calmly listen to the argument(s) without making assertions or assumptions. Be understanding, but do not give in to the pressure of choosing a side to agree with. Being indifferent is the best possible solution in a situation like this.
Let them work it out on their own.
All too often, families who are involved in fights aren’t really looking for solutions when they turn to another family member with their problem. They really just want someone who will listen so they can express their emotions.
Eventually, all family problems will work themselves out. The best thing for you to do is to quietly let those who are having problems work it out themselves. They will eventually come to an agreement (provided they are reasonable adults with sound judgment).
Offer possible solutions while remaining neutral.
You didn’t choose a side. You took a step back, in an effort to let them work things out on their own. If the family feud is still rolling strong, there may be one final last-ditch effort you’ll need to take to help extinguish the fire. If you have an idea for a possible solution to the squabble, and can offer it and still remain neutral, then go for it. However, remember that you must remain neutral because the instant you choose sides, you will become a part of the conflict within your family, too.
This content is accurate and true to the best of the author’s knowledge and is not meant to substitute for formal and individualized advice from a qualified professional.
© 2008 Hope Wilbanks