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How to Spy on Your Girlfriend

Updated on January 10, 2015

Go "Bond" and Spy on Her

If you are wondering whether your girlfriend is cheating on you or not and it is eating you up inside, you could just come right out and ask her but you might not believe her answer anyway.

So how do you find out if she is cheating or not?

There are a number of ways to find out but most of them would involve asking people that she knows, asking her and not being satisfied with the answer or getting the answer and have her dump you at the same time.

A good way to find out and put your mind at ease is to go "Bond" and spy on her.

That way you will avoid an argument and you can put your mind to rest and continue on to be happy or sad.

I do have to mention that if you suspect your girlfriend is cheating on you then the chances are that she probably is or that you have trust issues which you will then need to deal with or you might never be happy in any relationship.

How to be a "James Bond" Spy
How to be a "James Bond" Spy

Trust Issues - A reason to Spy

Some of us do have trust issues either because you started your relationship that way or you have past experiences that have led you to this place.

Spying is not healthy and it is also against your partners free will and if you are caught there will be consequences.

However, there is a time where you have to put your mind at ease and if spying is the only way to do that, then so be it.

You can finally get the peace of mind that you need or you will have clarity in a situation that has been disturbing you for a while.

Cheater or no cheater at least this way you will know for yourself and you can work towards a healthier you or you can send her packing and move on.

How do you spy without getting caught?

There are a number of useful tips to do this but you have to be a sneaky as possible and remember that if you do get caught and your girlfriend has been faithful, then you will be opening the door to a whole set of other problems.

In saying that here are a few easy steps to be "James Bond" and spy on your girlfriend.

Spy on Your Girlfriend - Step 1

The first step is an easy one as you need to know where she is going to be and at what specific time.

Unfortunately if your girlfriend is cheating on you, she might lie about her whereabouts so you cannot just come out and ask her.

You will need to follow her with some discretion in order to find out what she is up to and if where she said that she was going is true.

To do this you will have to ensure that you are at a very far distance when you decide to play "tracker" as she might notice you in her rearview mirror.

If possible borrow a car or bike from one of your friends so that she won't notice you.

Avoid wearing dark glasses and a cap because this will just draw attention to yourself and you will need to come up with another disguise....perhaps a wig?

If you are going to wait for her outside her home, then do not park in view of where she will be able to see you, instead, park a few cars down.

Once you have established where she is and how she will be getting there, then let the games begin.

To follow your girlfriend, keep a distance between you and once she has arrived at her destination, you then need to again, park away from where she is.

Give her a chance to get out of the car and space to move but do not let her out of your sight.

You will then get to see whether or not she is telling you the truth about where she is and you will see who it is that she is meeting.

Spying on your girlfriend can be done by climbing a tree or looking through the windows
Spying on your girlfriend can be done by climbing a tree or looking through the windows

"Peeping Tom" Step 2

Now that you have established where your girlfriend is and obviously you have found that she is not at the location that she gave you, you then need to get a closer look.

To do this you will have to be very calm and extremely quiete because if you are caught it might be a little awkward for everyone.

Once she is inside, you need to wait a few minutes and then proceed to wherever it is that she has gone to.

If she has gone into a restaurant then you will have to find a table behind her or pay someone to get you into the kitchen.

Should your girlfriend be in a house, then you can sneak to the windows but be careful of leaves and twigs that could make you visible!

All you are doing here is observing what is going on and you need to look at body language. If she is with a guy, is it someone that you know?

If it is then the question would be why she wasn't honest with you.

To see if she is flirting or taking an interest in this person you need to watch carefully.

If she likes the guy then she will be twirling her hair, touching him, laughing and making eye contact and last but not least, if she kisses him and holds tightly when they hug.

Keep calm and do not approach them, wait for the opportune moment.

Have you ever spied on your girlfriend?

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Confronting Your Girlfriend Step 3

Once you have seen that your girlfriend has lied about her location and who she was going to meet, you then need to ask a few questions.

Be calm and ask her how her day was, then ask her where she went and who she was there with.

Should she continue to lie you then need to keep calm and let it go....yes for now!

You wouldn't want her to know that you have been spying on her and the best way to do this is to wait a few days and then let her know that someone saw her with the guy.

If your dear girl denies it and there is no real reason why she would've been there, (a surprise party for you) then you should be well aware that something is up and this is your chance to walk away without being a fool.

Spying on your girlfriend by checking her emails, cellphone and social networks has to be done discreetly
Spying on your girlfriend by checking her emails, cellphone and social networks has to be done discreetly

Search Engine Step 4

There are other ways to spy on the girl you are in a relationship with and these are invading her privacy in a big way but if you desperately need to know what she is up to you can do a few naughty things;

Check her cellphone for names that you are not familiar with. It could be friends or work colleagues but they might not be and to see if she communicates with them often you can look through her text and call history for regular numbers at odd times.

Another way to search is to go through her emails both in the inbox, drafts, sent and deleted.

Look for anything suspicious and names that seem to be popular on her contacts list.

You could also ask one of her friends about odd behaviour or perhaps just question here for information that she might have. This will have to be done very subtly or you might get caught.

Drastic Measures Step 5

Should all else fail then there is another way to spy on your girlfriend and this way is a huge invasion of her privacy, it is illegal too!

Spyware can allow you to check her emails, social networks and calls to find anything that you might want to see to give you clues.

You can also add a tracker into her cellphone which will give you the location of where she is when you need to know.

Some spyware can even let you intercept a phone call so that you can actually listen in on a conversation.

The final way to be sure is to hire a private detective to do the work for you and this will cost you money but you will also get photographic proof too.

Keep love as light as a feather
Keep love as light as a feather

Love and Free Will

When you have done everything you can to find out if your girlfriend is cheating on you and you are still uncertain, perhaps because you have not found anything of value to add to your claim, you then need to sit down with her and let her know that you have trust issues and that if your relationship is going to work, you have to have an open communication and everything needs to be aired at all times.

I also need to remind you that if you have had to go through all of these measures to find out whether your girlfriend is faithful or not, then it might not be the right relationship for you.

Everyone has a thing called free will. The freedom to make their own choices and live their own lives and by spying you are taking away the free will of the person that you love.

Love should be as light as a feather and feel as free as a bird because you should be in a relationship with someone that you trust completely.

The right person will give you know reason to feel that she cannot be trusted and past relationships do not mean that your future ones will be the same.

Love is peaceful, free and easy and if there is no trust then there is no relationship.


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    • Tashaonthetown profile imageAUTHOR

      Natasha Pelati 

      3 years ago from South Africa

      Hahahaha! yes true.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 

      3 years ago from The Caribbean

      Interesting suggestions for risk takers. Hope they can resolve the trust issue without all this stress. Spies should be trained (smile).

    • Tashaonthetown profile imageAUTHOR

      Natasha Pelati 

      3 years ago from South Africa

      Yes thank you for your feedback. I also think that talking is very important and instead of going crazy spying it is a whole lot easier to just come out and ask. Some people have bad trust issues and won't believe the answers even if they are correct, so to see for themselves can put their minds at ease. I say trust is a big part of a relationship and if you feel that someone is cheating and you need to spy then it is probably not the right relationship to be in.

    • Richard1988 profile image


      3 years ago from Hampshire - England

      In my opinion the bit of this hub that is by far the best and needs emphasis is the last bit. Yes, spying on your significant other is possible (and very well outlined here) but the best advice here is given at the end rather than at the start. If you have trust issues talk about it. You may be worried that you sound like a nut case and will drive the person away but actively spying on someone is much more nutty. It is a tricky one for sure but spying would be a last resort (at least for me).


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