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How to Write Your Own Wedding Ceremony

Updated on February 25, 2010

Writing your own wedding ceremony can be a wonderful experience for you and your future spouse. It can bring you together, solidify what you want out of your wedding ceremony, and make your ceremony unique and authentic. However, it can be difficult to know where to start. Here are some tips to help you along the way.

Make an outline.

Just like your English teacher used to tell you, making an outline is the best way to start when you are writing from scratch. Decide upon the elements you want in your ceremony. While your vows will take center stage, the rest of the ceremony can incorporate any elements you would like. Many weddings include an acknowledgement of friends and family (such as your parents walking you down the aisle, or your officiant thanking the guests for their support), a unity ceremony (such as a salt ceremony, hand fasting, or unity candle), and readings or performances by friends and family.

Ask your officiant for advice.

Assuming that you have chosen an officiant who is okay with you writing the ceremony, ask him or her for advice. Your officiant has likely overseen many weddings and can offer sample wording, readings, or other resources. Take what you like from what he or she offers, and try to incorporate at least some of the material offered as a good-will gesture to your officiant.

Gather inspiration.

Inspiration for your wedding ceremony can come from anywhere. If you have favorite poems or authors, include some of their phrases or poetry into your ceremony. Consider your ethnic background, as many cultures and ethnicities have traditional wedding blessings and readings you can incorporate. Search online for ceremony scripts, as many wedding bloggers post these for others to view. Use imagery and terms from your interests and beliefs, such as references to nature for outdoors-lovers or references to religious texts for religious couples.


Be sure that your wedding ceremony is something that you and your spouse write together and are both comfortable with. If you are having trouble in starting to write your ceremony, you and your betrothed can each independently write some phrases or ideas, and then come together to meld them into one ceremony. If one partner is uncomfortable with a particular part of the ceremony, take it out. Your future marriage will be built on a commitment to unification, and writing your wedding ceremony should be a major step toward this process.

Image Credit: jurvetson, Flickr


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    Jennifer 7 years ago

    All very creative ideads for planning the ceremony. I would caution brides reading this to strongly consider a wedding coordinator to execute the events of their ceremony and reception. Wedding coordinators serve a important role in making sure your dream wedding ceremony ideas actually take shape. It's impossible to cue the wedding party at just the right time, or cue the special music, while you're standing at the altar. Your wedding coordinator exists to make your dreams a reality! Don't overlook their necessity while you plan out your ideal wedding day.