- Gender and Relationships
Easy ways to be more romantic
Whether you are in a new relationship or a long term one, it is important not to let the romance disappear over time. In new relationships often the romance is there naturally, although I have to say that on some other articles I have written I have received many questions from young people which seem to indicate they are preoccupied with the quality of the sex in their new relationship, and that they have not considered introducing romance at all. I honestly feel that relationships that include romance are the most likely to be the ones that survive for a lifetime. It is the small romantic gestures that often mean the most, and show us our partner, Husband or Wife truly loves us, (and wants to be sure we know it). Couples who have been together a long time are also often guilty of letting the romance dissipate as the years pass, I guess you could call it 'becoming complacent' or even 'taking your partner for granted'.
The reason I have written this article is to share some of my ideas for romantic gestures that couples both old and new can bring into their relationships. Hopefully the use of these ideas will help to keep some of the 'magic' alive and stop the marriage or relationship from going stale, or either partner being tempted to look around for 'pastures new' where they will receive some romantic attention.
A Weekend Break
If your budget can rise to a weekend break then it can be the perfect opportunity to spend some quality time together without the normal day to day chores and pressures getting in the way. Even a night away from home in a nice hotel can give you both time to relax, away from the children, allowing you both to enjoy a good meal, a few drinks and time together just to talk, without telephones, children crying, the television or the washing up to interrupt your evening. You can make the night away more romantic by arranging for a bottle of chilled champagne and two glasses to be waiting in the room for you and your partner upon your arrival.
You can have such fun leaving romantic notes for your loved one, and I am not talking about the obvious places either. Just a few words on a post it notelet saying something like 'Hi Sexy' or 'I Love You', and then placed in a 'surprise' location can mean so much to the recipient, and will most likely bring a smile to their face and give them a warm 'fuzzy' feeling inside. Some examples of the places you can secrete these loving notes might include the following:
Inside the lunchbox that they take to work
Their coat pocket
On their car seat
As a bookmark in their current book
On or under their pillow
In their wallet or purse
The Rose Petal Trail
Whether you use real rose petals or create fake ones from paper, you can have great romantic fun with a trail of rose petals leading to a variety of places. Imagine how loved the other person will feel if they come home from work to find a simple trail of petals they are clearly intended to follow to a destination. Perhaps you could periodically place a loving note (see above) along the course of the trail. Just a few ideas for where the trail could end include:
A candlelight meal for two in your dining room, complete with a beautifully laid table.
A candlelight bathroom with a bath full of scented bubbles and a glass of champagne on the side of the bath
A romantically lit bedroom (either with candles again, or dimmed electric lighting). The trail of rose petals ending on the bed itself
You, dressed in sexy lingerie (if you are a woman of course), and draped across a sofa or bed etc
Outside into the garden where a table, two chairs, a bottle of wine and two glasses await, and some soft music is playing in the background. This is most effective if done in the evening, and again a candle within a lantern helps to create the right romantic atmosphere
To a gift you know they will love, perhaps a giant teddy bear or a huge bunch of flowers
A Phone Call, Text or Email
During the day find time to make a short phone call or to send an email or text to your loved one telling them that you miss them or that you love them. It will only take you a few minutes, but it will let your partner know that you are thinking about them and remind them that you do care.
A simple gesture like reaching out to hold your partner's hand when you are walking along the street can mean a lot to them. It demonstrates that you are proud to be seen with them and want to have physical contact and show the world you two are an item.
A surprise gift doesn't need to cost much, it is the fact that you took the time to stop and think of a little something your partner would like that makes this gesture so romantic. Trust me when I say that most Husbands, Wives, boyfriends or girlfriends will be touched that you thought of them during your day, and then presented them with the small gift when you saw them next. The gifts can be anything that your budget can stand, but some examples might include:
A bunch of flowers
A single red rose
A chocolate heart, bunny, teddy bear etc (Lindt seem to make plenty of these kinds of shapes)
A piece of lingerie (mostly a gift for men to buy for their woman, but who knows!)
A bottle of their favourite tipple
An example of something they collect, be it ornaments, stamps, postcards etc
It may come as a surprise to you to know that one of the first things to 'go' in a failing relationship is the kissing. Couples will carry on having sexual relationships together well after they stop feeling comfortable with kissing each other. Even just a kiss goodbye when you leave the house to go to work or go shopping, or a kiss goodnight when one of you retires to bed before the other, is a romantic gesture in itself.
This might seem obvious, but so many people forget to pay attention to their partner by paying them simple compliments, (and this happens with even the most happily married couples). It is frustrating when you have made an effort to look nice for your partner and they fail to notice or comment on it. Even if you haven't noticed any obvious changes, a compliment can go a long way towards making your partner feel secure and loved. Consider complimenting your Husband, Wife or partner on things like:
Their great figure or their recent weight loss
Their new hair style
Their new outfit
Their physique/muscle tone
Their abilities in the bedroom!
The great job they have done of the gardening, the housework, the decorating etc
Their driving skills
Their sense of humour
Write a Poem
If you are one of those people who is good at writing poetry then why not write a poem dedicated to your partner. You can either give them the poem as it is, or even get it framed and hung up on a wall ready for when they come home from work.
Surely one of the most romantic ways a couple can enjoy a meal is as a picnic. You can fill a hamper with all your partner's favourite foods, and then find a lovely location to surprise him or her with the picnic. Why not take this a step further and make it moonlight picnic under the stars by the light of a full moon.
No matter how old any of us get, we all benefit from a cuddle on occasion, especially when we are feeling down or depressed. It takes just a couple of minutes out of your day to go up to your Husband, Wife or lover and give them a cuddle. It shows them you care and want to be close to them, (without it necessarily being a prelude to a sexual liaison).
A Treasure Trail
Create a series of clues that take him or her on a treasure hunt around your house and garden. Each clue could have a romantic sentiment on it, and a clue to where the next clue can be found. The treasure trail can end with a loving and romantic gift for him or her to find such as:
A piece of jewellery
A box of chocolates
A framed photo of the two of you together
Breakfast in Bed
This is one of the nicest things you can do to show your partner how much you love them. Get up early and cook them a superb fried breakfast with everything on it, bacon, eggs, sausages, tomato, mushrooms, fried bread etc. Take it up on a tray with orange juice and tea or coffee, plus a side plate of toast. If there is room on the tray a single rose in a small vase really finishes off the tray nicely.
Create a CD of their Favourite Music
This one is self explanatory. If you know what kind of music your partner loves, then why not create a customised CD for them featuring all their favourite romantic tracks. I find the soundtracks from romantic movies good for inspiration, e.g. Ghost and Dirty Dancing amongst others. Naturally this depends on the person and their own preferences, but I am sure you can come up with some good ideas based on your knowledge of your partner.
Take time to reminisce over good times you have had together, whether they were last week or last year. This helps to remind both of you why you fell in love in the first place, and allows you to show your partner how much those times meant to you (and how much the future ones will also mean to you).
Give them a Massage
Give your loved one a romantic massage which does or doesn't lead to a more intimate encounter. The important thing is that your partner knows you love them unconditionally, and that they are not obliged to follow up the act by making love afterwards, (for instance if they are tired from work, looking after the children etc). The massage can be purely to show your partner that you care that they feel relaxed and appreciate how tired they are. Of course if they clearly do want the massage to lead to making love afterwards that is perfectly okay, (and an added bonus for both of you).
Praise them in front of your Friends
Say complimentary things that praise your partner to your friends, preferably when your partner is within earshot so that he or she hears how much you appreciate them and why. It is always nice to feel appreciated and loved, but somehow extra special when you hear these qualities being quoted to other people.
A Romantic Walk
Whether you choose a walk along the beach in the sunset, a stroll through a pretty woodland or a snowy walk across the park, these kinds of scenic walks are romantic activities couples can enjoy together, listening to the sounds of nature and taking in some fresh air. Such walks can create some treasured memories for the future.
I hope these suggestions have given you a few new ideas for how to put some romance into your relationships and keep the passion and love alive. We should always remember that every day we are creating memories for the future, and we can never rely on the fact our partners in life will be around forever. In our later years we will draw on our memories to make us smile, so why not make sure those memories are the best they can be, both for ourselves and our chosen partners.
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