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How to feel sexy: Tips for girls and women to feel sexier and more confident

Updated on November 5, 2012
What do you see when you take a look in the mirror? To look sexy, you need to feel sexy from within.
What do you see when you take a look in the mirror? To look sexy, you need to feel sexy from within. | Source

Before you can look sexy you need to know how to feel sexy. Feeling sexier is all about loving your body, embracing it in its true self and developing a new found confidence in the girl or woman you perceive yourself to be. This post ignores cliché and shortsighted advice that every other glossy column dishes out about buying hot lingerie to feel more attractive. From new underwear to body hair to standing in front of the mirror, here's what it takes to feel sexy all over again.

1) Feeling sexy: Dealing with body hair, nails, brows and the works

The state of your body has a direct impact on whether you feel sexy or not. The first step on your way to feeling sexier is to spruce up every element of your body that defines your being.

Starting with body hair, get your arms and legs waxed, trim or remove hair from your pubic area, have your brows and facial hair looked at. Strip your body of unwanted hair and give yourself a smooth and light feel.

Move on to other things including doing a DIY manicure and pedicure at home, scrubbing the soles of your feet with a nice foot scrub and covering your skin with a dab of soothing and fragrant moisturizer. Feeling sexy begins with knowing that your body is smooth and clean.

2) Look in the mirror and appreciate your body

Rushing to catch the school bus, getting ready quickly to make it to the morning lecture in college or rummaging your way through makeup items to get ready for work, the rut of life may leave you little time to look at yourself in the mirror in admiration.

When you are in a hurry you are likely to look into the mirror and look for things you can fix, whether it is an out of place lock of hair or how your bra strap is making your formal top look bad.

Take some time out for yourself when you can be with yourself in your bedroom without being disturbed. Appreciate and admire your own self as you stand in front of the mirror. Do it clothed, and naked. It can be something as simple as loving how pretty your hair looks when it drops over your shoulders.

Rub your body down and cover it with an enriching body lotion.
Rub your body down and cover it with an enriching body lotion.

3) Feel yourself: Rub yourself down with lotion or oil

What is your typical morning shower routine like? Jumping straight out of the shower in your towel and hurrying to get dressed for work, college, school or mommy duties? Schedules and responsibilities can take a break for a day as you treat yourself to a nice bath.

Buy a nice body lotion, preferably one with moisturizing elements like Shea Butter. You won't go wrong with popular brands like Olay or Dove. Step out of a hot shower or a bath in the tub and dry yourself. Take out small quantities of lotion, spread it in your palms and rub your entire body down very slowly.

Consciously make an effort to feel your body as you apply lotion and think of it as giving yourself a tender soulful massage. The skin on your entire body will feel soft and radiant, making you feel sexier instantly.

Wait a minute or two for your skin to absorb the moisture, and put on nothing but your underwear and a bathrobe made from soft fabric. Veg out in front of the TV or while talking to someone on the phone and feel your body rejuvenating as you take a break from the hustle and bustle.

4) Buy new underwear: Experiment with different types of bras and panties

You may not have noticed but the bras and panties that you wear regularly will have been worn out from daily use. If the wear and tear makes them look dull or feel loose, maybe it is time for a change.

Hipsters, boy shorts, tanga panties or the classic brief, whatever your style is, head out to the local departmental or simply log on to and buy a few new pair of panties. Do the same with your bra and feel free to experiment with different cup styles or buy ones without straps for special occasions. Popular online shopping portals generally have a return policy. So if the size isn't right, the bra doesn't provide enough support, the straps bite or other discomfort issues arise, you can return or exchange the bra for one that fits better.

The tight fitting and fresh feel of new undergarments will instantly make you feel better about your body. It is one of the morale boosts that reaffirms your belief in something that was already there – Your sexiness.

It is good to be health conscious but don't start becoming obsessed with every mm and inch. It may only cause frustration.
It is good to be health conscious but don't start becoming obsessed with every mm and inch. It may only cause frustration.

5) Workout regularly but stop obsessing over your stats

Working out regularly is your best bet to not only feeling sexier from within, but looking sexier as well. Your quick initial workout sessions will soon bloom into elaborate and sweaty sessions of cardio and weights. Your body will firm up and you will start seeing definition as the months go by.

As you patiently wait for results to show, promise yourself that you won't be obsessed with your vital stats. It may be a good idea to keep a monthly track but taking out the measuring tape every other day and obsessing with every mm of your bust, waist and hips is not the way to go.

Such an obsession will make you unable to spot the difference in your body and can even make you feel dejected. Rather, measure yourself at regular intervals spaced out at least by a couple of months so you can really notice the difference your workouts are making.

6) Wear a nice fragrance

Feeling sexy is all about getting a bounce in your step all the time. A spray or two of your favorite perfume can instantly make you feel sexier whether you have just stepped out of the shower or you are nearing the end of a hectic day at work and heading out for after office drinks.

Besides the mirror cabinet in your bathroom and your closet, you can also tuck away a tiny bottle of Eau De Parfum or any other fragrance in your handbag.

If selecting a good perfume is outside your area of interest, play it safe by picking best selling numbers for women like Chanel No. 5, Burberry By Burberry, Dolce & Gabbana Light Blue By Dolce & Gabbana, White Diamonds By Elizabeth Taylor, Lovely by Sarah Jessica Parker or Euphoria by Calvin Klein.

When was the last time you posed like a diva and took pictures of yourself?
When was the last time you posed like a diva and took pictures of yourself?

7) Take pictures of yourself in different clothes and poses

To feel sexy, you need to realize how good you can look when you put on your best clothes and pose like a diva. Dress up and use your iPhone to take pictures of yourself. Pout, cross your legs, put your hand on your hip and pull of every pose you possibly can. You could also put a traditional digital SLR on a tripod, set it on auto-timer and give one pose after another as the flash goes off.

Look at the pictures over and over again to realize how pretty and beautiful you can actually look if you really wanted to embrace your inner diva. This new found admiration of self will make you feel sexier and give rise to a self confidence that you never knew about.

8) Wear the clothes that make you look good: Put your comfort clothes aside

There is no doubt that comfort clothes like your favorite pair of leggings or a worn out but smooth t-shirt that you've been holding onto since childhood feel really nice. But sometimes you need to push yourself out of your comfort clothes and into new clothes.

To address this issue, tuck away your comfort clothes in a drawer and lock it up. Promise yourself that you will not wear them for at least a month. The change in your everyday clothes will infuse a sense of vitality and freshness not only in the way you look, but also in your mindset. You will feel sexier and trendier.

Glossy women's magazines are fun to read. But don't ever compare your body to that of professional models.
Glossy women's magazines are fun to read. But don't ever compare your body to that of professional models.

9) Don't compare yourself with girls in magazines

Unless you are a model yourself, you are doing no good comparing your body to the skinny and lean figures of twenty something girls in risque outfits. Pictures of models and celebrities in women's magazines, tabloids and gossip columns may be edited and airbrushed. Stop wasting your time feeling sorry for yourself and your body by looking at size zero models.

Just like every man is not a younger or older version of Brad Pitt, every woman is not supposed to look like Mila Kunis or Miranda Kerr. It would be unnatural to expect yourself to have curves like models and celebrities because even they aren't like that all the time in real life.

10) Don't make fun of your body

Promise yourself that under no circumstances will you ever make fun of your body, including passing silly jokes. Whether you are having a candid talk with your female colleagues or a comical discussion with your best friend, no longer will you crack jokes about how you are gaining weight or how your love handles are ruining your new top.

When you make fun of your own body, you could be passively subjecting yourself to ridicule from others. Your crude jokes can also leave a dent on your confidence.

Start appreciating your body today at this very minute. Pamper yourself and always remember that feeling sexy comes before looking sexy.


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